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emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Nobody can be in charge of someone else’s happiness. But what does that really mean? If that was true, was it pointless to try to help?
Such a beautiful, touching book that I feel is so important. Recently, the number of stories that focus on what it's like in a mentally ill person's head has been increasing, and I'm glad it is so. It's something that needs to be discussed, both in order for those of us whose brains are actively working against us to see ourselves in fiction and to help others understand. But Breathing Underwater does a no less valuable job by presenting the view of someone close to a mentally ill person. Because—I'm saying this as someone who's been on both side of the divide—it's a big struggle, too.
Olivia had such a mature outlook throughout the book, even when she inevitably snapped for a bit at one point. The way she wanted to make her sister Ruth feel better and struggled against her inability to do so, the way she tried to figure out whether she should tone down the louder, perkier aspects of her personality, the way she used her art (photography) to try and communicate—all of that was just so relatable. I also loved how Ruth's storyline was treated. She did get better at the end, but it was clear that she didn't get magically cured. There are going to be bad days ahead, and The Pit will come calling, and the point of the story is so clearly not about overcoming depression once and for all, but about learning to live with it and sometimes defeat it on a daily basis. And while of course it's mainly the ill person's battle, those who surround them have their own challenges—and their own weapons.
Even outside the central mental health aspect, I just loved the relationship between the sisters, with all the pitfalls and tenderness. And their relationship with their parents' friends who are taking them on their roadtrip, as well. Ellie and Eddie are both the kind of adults I think I wanted to see around myself growing up. And the girls' parents are pretty awesome, too. It was great to see how while Olivia sometimes felt that things were mostly about Ruth, as soon as she needed love, support, and acceptance herself, she immediately got it from the adults around them, without Ruth losing any.
All in all, despite the heavy topic at the heart of this story, it was ultimately so heartwarming and hopeful for me. I'll definitely need to look more into Sarah Allen's work.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Moderate: Medical content
Minor: Abandonment
challenging
funny
hopeful
inspiring
sad
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
“So do you want to keep hurting yourself, or do you want to hurt them?”
Wow! I can't believe how much was packed into such a short read. Honestly, it's more impressive than some full novels I've read (and of course now I positively crave a full novel with these very characters). This story is a great exploration of the ugliest facets of capitalism, and how having a world with magic fixes nothing if the people in charge of it are the same familiar assholes. But of course, there's always someone who will find it in themselves to actively rage against the corporate machine. And even if they lose, that doesn't mean the machine has to win.
I absolutely adored both Noah and Manny and their relationship, and how casually their asexuality and Manny's genderqueerness were woven into the narrative. They were great together, and each of them is great as an individual, and honestly, I had no idea how much I've been craving a story about two badass disabled/chronically ill queers fucking over the system until I read this story.
Also, the magic system? It never gets delved into in detail, which is understandable given the story's size, but everything that does show up on the page is so endlessly fascinating. Because of how the magic is handled, I almost want to call this a sci-fi story instead of a modern day fantasy one.
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I’m ahead of schedule and this is a problem.
This is such a thoughtful and well-written story with a lot of diversity. A lot of Ellen's experience navigating the uncomfortably changing world around her felt relatable and made me think back to my own preteen years. I also really loved Isa and the way their gender identity was handled. This book is a great reminder that even in a world where neurodivergent, nonbinary, and otherwise "different" kids have the language to talk about their experiences and can afford to actually talk about them openly, we still have such a long way to go. At the same time, that long road no longer feels impossible.
I really loved the characters in this book and the way the MC always has a support system to rely on, even when things get too much and out of control. Throughout all the challenges she experiences, being in a new place and facing a lot of unexpected things and being on shaky footing with her best friend, there's just so much kindness and hope. You know, just... this certainty that in the long run, no matter what life throws at them, Ellen and her friends are going to be all right.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Ableism, Transphobia
emotional
funny
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
“Are we really bad at this?” I asked. “We’ve been fake dating for three days and we’ve already fake broken up once.”
“Yes, but we fake resolved our difficulties and fake got back together, and I’m hoping it’s made us fake stronger.”
I cracked this book open with the full intention of loving the hell out of it. After all, it's by Alexis Hall, and he's one of my favorite romance authors. And my friends have been recommending it to me for ages. And everyone kept saying it had the vibe of a far more adult Red, White & Royal Blue, and I absolutely adored that one. Oh, and finally, it's a fake dating romance with a tint of enemies-to-lovers, how cool is that?
However, for the first looong half of the story, my heart just wasn't in it. I kept trying to figure out what was wrong. There were plenty of hilarious moments. And plenty of dramatic moments with feelings. And lots and lots of compelling characters and cool scenes and amazing banter. But somehow, all of it refused to come together into a single engaging tapestry.
It was in the second half that I realized what wasn't working for me: I would have loved this book so hard if it was from Oliver's point of view and not Luc's.
I mean, I don't mind Luc. And he's certainly the logical choice for the POV character if there only has to be one. He's the one with all the stuff going on: family and work and paparazzi and his life and mind both being a huge mess. But Oliver was just so more compelling to me. I would have loved a book focused front and centered on someone who is so put together (but also a strongly contained mess on the inside, because aren't we all), and who gets confronted by and pulled into all of Luc's chaos and inadvertently helps Luc find his footing while slowly losing and then regaining his own.
I felt like Oliver's arc was so much more interesting and had more depth, but it took so long for it to truly become prominent on page. Because we spend the entire book in Luc's POV, and Luc sure took his time to actually see Oliver. He kept catching glimpses here and there, but then his own insecurities kept getting in the way.
So all in all: I enjoyed the story, but not how it was told/presented, I guess. And it well may be a case of "it's not you, dear book, it's me," so I guess 4 stars will be a fair rating.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Abandonment, Alcohol
Moderate: Cancer
Minor: Homophobia
funny
lighthearted
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
You’ve got a date with a prince! Stop being you! And just be yourself!
This book strongly reminded me of those late seasons of Glee when most of the cast were hanging around in New York playing at having new adult drama which was somehow indistinguishable from the high school drama. It left me with exactly the same impression: funny, mindless, ridiculous, absolutely over the top, frankly not good at all, but also a great way to pass the time. I'm unlikely to ever recommend it to anyone, but I had a pleasant few hours in these characters' company. (How was that weird woman the Queen of England, though? And what in the world made the two leads fall for each other in the first place? My brain will never know!)
challenging
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
What makes therapy challenging is that it requires people to see themselves in ways they normally choose not to. A therapist will hold up the mirror in the most compassionate way possible, but it’s up to the patient to take a good look at that reflection, to stare back at it and say, “Oh, isn’t that interesting! Now what?” instead of turning away.
This is definitely the sort of book that leaves a lasting impression. On one hand, I can't say I've learned anything profoundly new; I've been in therapy for a long time, and I've been interested in the matters of psychology and mental health since my late teens. On the other hand, there were plenty of little moments that made me reexamine the familiar things from brand-new angles and arrive to new conclusions. It was also really interesting to see therapy sessions unfold from the other side of the coach, and to see a therapist as a patient.
I absolutely loved the way the narrative unfolded, too; how both Lori and her clients came in with relatively small-scale problems, for the most part, then dug deeper into the large-scale ones hiding underneath, and then arrived into proper existential crises—and figured out their paths through those, one way or another. The book is filled with relentless compassion, kindness, and humanity, and it left me with a strong reminder that if a problem doesn't seem solvable, perhaps you're solving the wrong problem. Or at the very least, perhaps there are other problems you can solve that will make the big central thing easier to live with and change your perception of it.
In a way, I picked up this book because I'm going through a hard time and I wanted more tools to figure out my pain and the methods of dealing with it. I can't say it worked—which isn't surprising, I was just reading a book about people whose problems aren't just like mine, I wasn't sitting in front of a therapist. But it definitely has given me more tools to poke at my pain with while I wait until I can afford therapy again.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Alcoholism, Cancer, Death
Moderate: Child death, Car accident
adventurous
emotional
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I hurt you terribly because I was trying not to hurt you terribly. Can you forgive me?
Somehow, I expected to like this book more than book 2 and at least as much as book 1. Possibly because I loved Piper so much when he appeared in Paladin's Grace and I really wanted to see more of him. Well, in this regard, at least, I wasn't disappointed; Piper's been awesome all along. I really enjoyed his dry wit and his outlook on life.
However, the story at large was somewhat... unsatisfactory. While Piper was awesome, I can't say the same about Galen. He was fun and familiar in the first half of the story, but then he just started reverting deeper and deeper into the one-dimensional "I am very dangerous, woe is me" state and became the embodiment of "break their heart in order to save them" trope, except Piper didn't need saving and it was just all very frustrating. I mean, this is a T. Kingfisher book about traumatized paladins, I except a lot of pining and wallowing and worrying about not being good for each other! But it was just so heavy-handed here, and it didn't feel completely organic for this character. I'm not saying I didn't think Galen would wallow and worry, but I just... expected him to do it differently? Idk.
The non-romance part was somewhat disappointing, as well. I expected a mystery with some adventure. Instead, most of the book was devoted to an escape room quest. Yes, there were some great moments, some amazing banter, some quirky worldbuilding, but for the most part... Eh. Meh.
Despite all that, the cliffhanger it ended on basically guarantees that I will continue with the series. It was nice to see Stephen again, among other characters, and to delve deeper into the gnolls' culture. And I really can't disagree with the book's stance on cops... er, guards.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Panic attacks/disorders, Medical content, Injury/Injury detail
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I was the climber of a sheer cliff, dragging myself on bleeding hands towards a summit that I’d never reach and sometimes didn’t want to reach. The things I cared about were the hooks I’d driven into the rock face. Depression snapped them, one by one, one by one. My only certainty was the fall. Perhaps I should have told him: don’t trust me with anything precious. But I wanted what he had given me too much to be anything other than selfish.
This was my second time reading this book; I'm not entirely sure when the first was one, probably in 2015 or so? Ages ago. It's always a little nerve-inducing for me to return to old favorites. What if a story that moved me so much years ago does nothing for me this time? That would be... a totally normal thing, actually, because we change and our tastes changes with us, but I still feel odd whenever that happens.
It didn't happen with Glitterland, though. I was as invested into the book as I was the first time around, even though I remembered the general shape of the story, and there were plenty of moments that made my eyes wet even though I knew they were coming. Just like I did years ago, I still feel this is among the best books to capture the draining experience of depression and anxiety, and the impact it has on every area of life. That chapter describing the utter existential horror of going to a grocery store? Yeah, I know, this is something that many mentally healthy, neurotypical people may see as ridiculous. But it's a thing, and the days when finally dragging yourself out of bed after a week of staring in the ceiling becomes a victory to celebrate are a thing, too, as is the confusion of personal relationship when people who actively mean to help you actually harm you in the process and you harm them even harder in turn because you don't know how to explain what's going on, and what you feel, and how they impact you.
What I loved the most was that, even though the subject of Ash's mental health was firmly at the center of the story, his bipolar depression and anxiety never became his entire personality. It was clear throughout the book that his bad qualities and flaws aren't a symptom of his mental disorder. It's just that his mental disorder makes it harder for him to manage them. But he still needs to do that, even if it takes him more effort and different tools, and he should be held accountable for the mistakes that he makes. It was perhaps my favorite part of the book—seeing him realize that, too, and take steps toward growth.
Something else I should probably mention is the prose. Honestly, for the most part it borders on purple. It's overtly pretentious. And it works so well to showcase Ash's voice and personality. Just chef's kiss. On the other hand, what I didn't enjoy too much upon this reread was the way Darian's accent was handled, spelling every word the way he pronounces it. Maybe it's an ESL thing, but it made it harder for me to concentrate on some parts of the story and slowed me down. So that's the single reason this is now a 4.75 book for me, not a 5-star book (though really, it's more like a 4.9).
Content Warnings
Moderate: Suicide attempt
emotional
hopeful
lighthearted
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
All he wanted to do was bask in the garden of his brand-new house where everything was safe and warm and friendly, and stay tucked up in Jacobi's embrace forever.
I have to admit I enjoyed this second installment much less than the first book in the series. I came for the 1920s with magic, and the magic part was rather lacking; it may as well not have existed at all, and the plot would hardly suffer for it. True, there's the entire dream-sharing plot that was a big part of the characters' relationship, but honestly, if those were just regular non-magical dreams, very few things would change.
So I came for a slice of light magic and what I got was simply a 1920s historical where a guy who'd rather stay a confirmed bachelor is forced to marry—but luckily, his bride just wants to be friends and provide each other with cover for their respective queer relationships. And that's not a bad thing at all! In fact, that's the sort of story I really like, and I did like many things about this book in particular. It's just... expectations, you know?
Another thing that annoyed me was how everybody treated Alphonse as air-headed and, well, the opposite of clever. He kept thinking that way of himself, too, and I kept wanting him to stop bringing himself down that way. But then of course there were all those well-meaning friends who told him things like "at least you're handsome," and ugh. That's just grating. Honestly, the main evidence of his "low intelligence" in the book was taking a long time to sort out his feelings and put names to them, and that's okay. People feel differently. People think differently. Some people may need more time and space, or perhaps very different conditions, to achieve things an average person achieves in less time. That doesn't make anyone stupid.
That part aside, the book had plenty of cotton-candy sweetness and some super lovely moments. It's all fluff, and could be a great pick-me-up, and in the long run, I'm okay with having to calibrate my genre expectations mid-book. But the intelligence part really bugged me.
emotional
hopeful
lighthearted
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
The wooden door was open a crack and a warm flickering light spilled out onto the porch. I could smell the smoke of a fire, and something good cooking mixed with honeysuckle and wild rose and a million other flowers that I couldn't name.
A lovely little fairy tale with abundant lesbian and trans rep. For such a short novella, it's really plotty, with plenty of surprises and secrets coming the reader's way. Where it fell short for me was the romance; while both characters are wonderful and interesting people, Mel especially, and I could see them working well together eventually, there was just... next to no development. It was like they just started to become friends, and then suddenly there were feelings and invitations to spend the night together—it all came pretty much out of nowhere. I wish the age gap between them was addressed, too, and not just mentioned in passing.
Despite that, I enjoyed this brief yet eventful journey. As I said, the characters were so nice, and I especially loved Fen the (non-)cat and his antics. Also, I really appreciated the evocative descriptions that made every part of this cozy setting come alive in front of my mind's eye, from Mel's cottage in the swamps to the witch market.