This was my second time reading this book; I'm not entirely sure when the first was one, probably in 2015 or so? Ages ago. It's always a little nerve-inducing for me to return to old favorites. What if a story that moved me so much years ago does nothing for me this time? That would be... a totally normal thing, actually, because we change and our tastes changes with us, but I still feel odd whenever that happens.

It didn't happen with Glitterland, though. I was as invested into the book as I was the first time around, even though I remembered the general shape of the story, and there were plenty of moments that made my eyes wet even though I knew they were coming. Just like I did years ago, I still feel this is among the best books to capture the draining experience of depression and anxiety, and the impact it has on every area of life. That chapter describing the utter existential horror of going to a grocery store? Yeah, I know, this is something that many mentally healthy, neurotypical people may see as ridiculous. But it's a thing, and the days when finally dragging yourself out of bed after a week of staring in the ceiling becomes a victory to celebrate are a thing, too, as is the confusion of personal relationship when people who actively mean to help you actually harm you in the process and you harm them even harder in turn because you don't know how to explain what's going on, and what you feel, and how they impact you.

What I loved the most was that, even though the subject of Ash's mental health was firmly at the center of the story, his bipolar depression and anxiety never became his entire personality. It was clear throughout the book that his bad qualities and flaws aren't a symptom of his mental disorder. It's just that his mental disorder makes it harder for him to manage them. But he still needs to do that, even if it takes him more effort and different tools, and he should be held accountable for the mistakes that he makes. It was perhaps my favorite part of the book—seeing him realize that, too, and take steps toward growth.

Something else I should probably mention is the prose. Honestly, for the most part it borders on purple. It's overtly pretentious. And it works so well to showcase Ash's voice and personality. Just chef's kiss. On the other hand, what I didn't enjoy too much upon this reread was the way Darian's accent was handled, spelling every word the way he pronounces it. Maybe it's an ESL thing, but it made it harder for me to concentrate on some parts of the story and slowed me down. So that's the single reason this is now a 4.75 book for me, not a 5-star book (though really, it's more like a 4.9).