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lory_enterenchanted's Reviews (582)
challenging
dark
emotional
sad
tense
fast-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
The first part of this book was extraordinary, as McCurdy recounted her years in the thrall of the mother of all narcissistic mothers, not judging or commenting on the events, but building a devastating picture of how a child who is made responsible for an adult's happiness is warped and disfigured by that role. This could serve as a psychological case study of a dysfunctional family and of "the necessary delusion" that keeps a person from recognizing they had an abusive childhood. McCurdy did have a sense that something was wrong, at least from the time her mom started encouraging her anorexia at age 11, but the layers of self-protection and deception that build up in a child who is not protected or nurtured by her caregivers kept her from breaking free for many years. In fact, she says she could not have broken free if her mom was still alive. (That's the reason for the title -- and while expressing that feeling breaks a huge taboo in her culture, I think she's absolutely right to feel that way.)
The second part, after her mom's death, felt incomplete, with a large gap skipping over most of the healing process. After some unsuccessful attempts, with a first therapist who in my opinion engaged in unhealthy, enmeshing behavior (though McCurdy does not comment on this) and then unskillfully tried to get her to confront her mom's abuse, the focus shifts to how therapy partly helped her overcome her eating disorder, but leaves all the many other complex issues along with that aside. McCurdy decided she was going to get better, and then suddenly she was better, and able to walk away from her mother's grave.
What happened? How did she get there? That's what I'd like to know. I'm really glad that it seems McCurdy was able to overcome her eating disorder and reclaim her life, but it might be helpful for anyone going through similar issues to know more about her journey. However, she seems to have decided to keep that private, and that's her right of course. It just made an odd gap in the narrative for me.
The first part of this book was extraordinary, as McCurdy recounted her years in the thrall of the mother of all narcissistic mothers, not judging or commenting on the events, but building a devastating picture of how a child who is made responsible for an adult's happiness is warped and disfigured by that role. This could serve as a psychological case study of a dysfunctional family and of "the necessary delusion" that keeps a person from recognizing they had an abusive childhood. McCurdy did have a sense that something was wrong, at least from the time her mom started encouraging her anorexia at age 11, but the layers of self-protection and deception that build up in a child who is not protected or nurtured by her caregivers kept her from breaking free for many years. In fact, she says she could not have broken free if her mom was still alive. (That's the reason for the title -- and while expressing that feeling breaks a huge taboo in her culture, I think she's absolutely right to feel that way.)
The second part, after her mom's death, felt incomplete, with a large gap skipping over most of the healing process. After some unsuccessful attempts, with a first therapist who in my opinion engaged in unhealthy, enmeshing behavior (though McCurdy does not comment on this) and then unskillfully tried to get her to confront her mom's abuse, the focus shifts to how therapy partly helped her overcome her eating disorder, but leaves all the many other complex issues along with that aside. McCurdy decided she was going to get better, and then suddenly she was better, and able to walk away from her mother's grave.
What happened? How did she get there? That's what I'd like to know. I'm really glad that it seems McCurdy was able to overcome her eating disorder and reclaim her life, but it might be helpful for anyone going through similar issues to know more about her journey. However, she seems to have decided to keep that private, and that's her right of course. It just made an odd gap in the narrative for me.
emotional
inspiring
tense
fast-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
Though at first I felt as though I was reading a treatise about Deaf/Deafblind rights in story form, eventually I was swept away by the characters, and raced through the exciting denouement, which although implausible, was certainly heartwarming. I would like to read more Deafblind writers about their own experience, but I learned a lot about what it's like to be an interpreter. If I were younger I'd be interested in training in ASL myself, but alas I think it's too late for me.
I've had firsthand experience of how difficult it can be to see guardians and caregivers not acting in the best interests of their wards or clients, so it's important to raise attention about that problem. I appreciated that all the characters had good and bad sides, all just trying to be human in their own, sometimes misguided ways.
Though at first I felt as though I was reading a treatise about Deaf/Deafblind rights in story form, eventually I was swept away by the characters, and raced through the exciting denouement, which although implausible, was certainly heartwarming. I would like to read more Deafblind writers about their own experience, but I learned a lot about what it's like to be an interpreter. If I were younger I'd be interested in training in ASL myself, but alas I think it's too late for me.
I've had firsthand experience of how difficult it can be to see guardians and caregivers not acting in the best interests of their wards or clients, so it's important to raise attention about that problem. I appreciated that all the characters had good and bad sides, all just trying to be human in their own, sometimes misguided ways.
informative
inspiring
reflective
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
"If there is any hope, therefore, for the renewal of our culture, the Desert Fathers and Mothers remind us that it will not come through a church bent on protecting itself from the world. Nor will it come from a moralizing church spouting judgment on the world--and least of all from a church trying to 'take back' the culture from the world. All of these are but manifestations of the blockade and chief contributors to the desolation of our age." (from an uncorrected advance copy)
Arndt is a preacher who is trying to make the wisdom of the Desert Fathers and Mothers relevant for our time, their radical turning to simplicity, silence, and non-possessiveness in an age when the formerly threatened Church was finally being made secure by its alliance with Empire. Being a Christian is not about "protecting oneself from the world" at all, nor about gaining power and security, but about entering into a process of life as self-giving, constant offering, prayer. It's a good message to keep in mind during our own apocalyptic times.
The excerpts and reflections from ancient texts were good for pondering and reflection, and Arndt's commentary was homely, folksy and down-to-earth -- sometimes too much so for me. I think I'd rather just read the source material. But I did appreciate this introduction to a subject I hadn't known much about.
There were repeated fulminatings against people who are looking for self-realization or to do their own thing, and exhortations to return to the church, which always knows best. I think this is a bit outdated. Humans have evolved, and we do need to individuate and become ourselves, beyond all institutions and rules. Even divorce may be necessary sometimes, gasp! Of course, we do need to return to community, to find our way back to healthy relationships. But Arndt's attitude to the "self-seekers" was too patronizing and one-sided, I think. He admits he's always been part of a church and found his deepest life meaning there, and it seems hard for him to imagine another way.
"If there is any hope, therefore, for the renewal of our culture, the Desert Fathers and Mothers remind us that it will not come through a church bent on protecting itself from the world. Nor will it come from a moralizing church spouting judgment on the world--and least of all from a church trying to 'take back' the culture from the world. All of these are but manifestations of the blockade and chief contributors to the desolation of our age." (from an uncorrected advance copy)
Arndt is a preacher who is trying to make the wisdom of the Desert Fathers and Mothers relevant for our time, their radical turning to simplicity, silence, and non-possessiveness in an age when the formerly threatened Church was finally being made secure by its alliance with Empire. Being a Christian is not about "protecting oneself from the world" at all, nor about gaining power and security, but about entering into a process of life as self-giving, constant offering, prayer. It's a good message to keep in mind during our own apocalyptic times.
The excerpts and reflections from ancient texts were good for pondering and reflection, and Arndt's commentary was homely, folksy and down-to-earth -- sometimes too much so for me. I think I'd rather just read the source material. But I did appreciate this introduction to a subject I hadn't known much about.
There were repeated fulminatings against people who are looking for self-realization or to do their own thing, and exhortations to return to the church, which always knows best. I think this is a bit outdated. Humans have evolved, and we do need to individuate and become ourselves, beyond all institutions and rules. Even divorce may be necessary sometimes, gasp! Of course, we do need to return to community, to find our way back to healthy relationships. But Arndt's attitude to the "self-seekers" was too patronizing and one-sided, I think. He admits he's always been part of a church and found his deepest life meaning there, and it seems hard for him to imagine another way.
challenging
dark
emotional
sad
tense
fast-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
Read this upon the recommendation of Deb from The Book Stop. It was an excellent choice! I've read a number of these "multiple-perspective" novels lately, the most recent being Salt Houses. In some ways I miss the continuity of staying with one character for longer, but it can also add something that we miss when limited to one point of view, honoring the difficult and multi-layered reality of human relationships. I need to reread Antigone now.
Read this upon the recommendation of Deb from The Book Stop. It was an excellent choice! I've read a number of these "multiple-perspective" novels lately, the most recent being Salt Houses. In some ways I miss the continuity of staying with one character for longer, but it can also add something that we miss when limited to one point of view, honoring the difficult and multi-layered reality of human relationships. I need to reread Antigone now.
informative
medium-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
This was helpful as I try to get to the bottom of my own migraines. I was already doing a diet like this but now I have more information about why it may work. The theory about an overly burdened and stressed hypothalamus being the source of migraine makes sense. I think, though, there should be more acknowledgement of emotional and psychological factors, not only the physical, material aspect. For me, diet alone has not been enough to eliminate my migraines, nor is it enough to say to "reduce stress." When stress is a result of longtime, unconscious patterns resulting from past trauma, it is not easy to undo it. But I can see now how necessary it is, in order to restore health and take the pressure off of my poor, hardworking hypothalamus, so I have renewed motivation to keep trying. The quest will continue!
This was helpful as I try to get to the bottom of my own migraines. I was already doing a diet like this but now I have more information about why it may work. The theory about an overly burdened and stressed hypothalamus being the source of migraine makes sense. I think, though, there should be more acknowledgement of emotional and psychological factors, not only the physical, material aspect. For me, diet alone has not been enough to eliminate my migraines, nor is it enough to say to "reduce stress." When stress is a result of longtime, unconscious patterns resulting from past trauma, it is not easy to undo it. But I can see now how necessary it is, in order to restore health and take the pressure off of my poor, hardworking hypothalamus, so I have renewed motivation to keep trying. The quest will continue!
adventurous
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
tense
medium-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
This really hit home for me. Story of a young woman trying to define her own space within a loving but trauma-damaged family, with ghosts and gods in present-day Malaysia. How to transform our rage into regenerative power is much on my own mind right now. Discussion to come for Witch Week at Lizzie Ross's blog.
This really hit home for me. Story of a young woman trying to define her own space within a loving but trauma-damaged family, with ghosts and gods in present-day Malaysia. How to transform our rage into regenerative power is much on my own mind right now. Discussion to come for Witch Week at Lizzie Ross's blog.
challenging
emotional
sad
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
Stories of a repeatedly displaced Palestinian family, told through four generations of descent and set in many countries, circling back in the end to the lost home that cannot be returned to again. The stories bring out both the vulnerability and the strength in the human spirit, the way something continues to spring up and renew itself in spite of the constant pressure of war and violence.
Stories of a repeatedly displaced Palestinian family, told through four generations of descent and set in many countries, circling back in the end to the lost home that cannot be returned to again. The stories bring out both the vulnerability and the strength in the human spirit, the way something continues to spring up and renew itself in spite of the constant pressure of war and violence.
adventurous
dark
fast-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
This was promising in many ways, but it fizzled out so vaguely in the end. So many threads crying for resolution ... What happened to the Inquisitor? Ceceline just lets Sylvie go (it's not entirely clear what she wanted her for in the first place)? Sylvie never finds someone to help her use her gift? I suppose the message was that "life isn't like that," but sometimes books should be.
This was promising in many ways, but it fizzled out so vaguely in the end. So many threads crying for resolution ... What happened to the Inquisitor? Ceceline just lets Sylvie go (it's not entirely clear what she wanted her for in the first place)? Sylvie never finds someone to help her use her gift? I suppose the message was that "life isn't like that," but sometimes books should be.
challenging
dark
emotional
informative
mysterious
reflective
sad
tense
slow-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
Who killed Sylvia Plath? Was it the invasive mother, the dead father, the callously philandering husband, the witchy other woman, the thoughtless lover, the misguided psychiatrist, the inattentive friends? Was it the rejecting editors, the lukewarm critics, the baffled public? Was it the drugs, the doctors, the genes, the traumatic stress, the postpartum depression, the touch of madness? Was it England, was it America, was it all of Western society, was it the whole world? Was it modernity, was it toxic masculinity, was it God or the lack of God?
In this exhaustive and admirably balanced biography, all of these come in for their share of the responsibility for a poet's death. But in the end, that death remains as incalculable as the source of poetry itself. Destiny is a mystery that the biographer can only make a gesture toward, not a final judgment. This short life is one I'll be thinking about for a long time, especially the role of botched psychiatry in altering and probably ending it. That field at least needs to learn some lessons from Plath's tragic end.
Who killed Sylvia Plath? Was it the invasive mother, the dead father, the callously philandering husband, the witchy other woman, the thoughtless lover, the misguided psychiatrist, the inattentive friends? Was it the rejecting editors, the lukewarm critics, the baffled public? Was it the drugs, the doctors, the genes, the traumatic stress, the postpartum depression, the touch of madness? Was it England, was it America, was it all of Western society, was it the whole world? Was it modernity, was it toxic masculinity, was it God or the lack of God?
In this exhaustive and admirably balanced biography, all of these come in for their share of the responsibility for a poet's death. But in the end, that death remains as incalculable as the source of poetry itself. Destiny is a mystery that the biographer can only make a gesture toward, not a final judgment. This short life is one I'll be thinking about for a long time, especially the role of botched psychiatry in altering and probably ending it. That field at least needs to learn some lessons from Plath's tragic end.
adventurous
dark
mysterious
tense
medium-paced
Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle
Read for the Dark Is Rising readalong 2022, reviewed on the blog.
Read for the Dark Is Rising readalong 2022, reviewed on the blog.