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372 reviews by:
fictionalfelix
3 stars
I really didn't want to write this review. I feel like some kind of traitor to the ace community for rating this anything lower than 5 stars, since it has so many glowing reviews. And it did have a lot of merit – I love how stories of POC and disabled ace people were featured.
However. Some aspects of this book... upset me. Probably because I am a small naive child. But I felt like I wasn't the intended audience of this book. It felt geared toward allosexual allies to spread awareness of the ace community more than it felt actually written for asexual people themselves, and I think aro or romantic asexual people who want a less conventional relationship than I do would be a better fit for this book than I was.
To clear things up: I am an asexual person who experiences romantic attraction, and not only that, but I want a rom-com worthy relationship with all the cheesy romantic trappings, except sex, which I am not open to at all and of which the very concept scares me. I didn't see myself in this book at all. Far from it – this book made me question if I am actually asexual since I want an extremely romantic relationship, and it also made me question if I actually experience romantic attraction since I'm not open to sex at all. This book literally made me cry three times, and books almost never make me cry.
Now, I'll summarize exactly what I did and didn't like:
What I did like:
- As I said, stories of POC and disabled ace people are showcased, focusing on the intersection of their various identities, which was quite enlightening.
- It was mostly very well written and easy to read. My only issue with the writing is how contradictory some of it seemed, which I'll mention in the what I didn't like section.
- I read it in only like 6 days, which is amazingly fast for me.
-I think the book as a whole had extremely good intentions and all the complaints I have are all unintentional on the author's part.
What I didn't like:
-The chapter on romantic attraction seemed off. The author says toward the end of the chapter that she is by no means saying that romantic and platonic attraction is the same thing, but throughout the chapter that seems like what she's implying, and throughout the whole book, romantic attraction seems kind of erased and portrayed as secondary and less important. Personally, I think there's more of a clear boundary between romantic and platonic attraction than the author makes it seem. It made romance seem less romantic and more technical, and I am such an innocent hopeless romantic child that that bothered me.
- Every single romantic couple mentioned in the book has had sex at some point, either on a regular basis, as part of some compromise (now the very word compromise scares me because of this book), or they used to do it in the past and later decided they didn't want to. It makes it seem like a queer-platonic relationship is the only option if you don't want to ever have sex. So I guess I'm going to be single forever then if having sex at some point is necesary to be in a romantic relationship.
- It is implied toward the end of the book that if ace people are accepted in society, the label asexual will be completely unnecessary and can then be done away with. I don't think that's what the author actually meant, but at any rate, that part didn't make any sense to me and made me upset for no good reason because I am extremely attached to the label asexual
-The writing in general is pretty contradictory in some places, as the last several points somewhat illustrate.
In summary, I have no idea what to think of this book. I went into it fully expecting to love it, not have multiple mental breakdowns over it.
Would I recommend it? Hmm, actually I think I probably would, believe it or not. It has a lot of good points in it, and it probably wouldn't upset most people anywhere near as much as it upset me. Besides, most people have rated it very highly. However, another book on the topic that I personally liked better and would recommend more is [b:The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality|20344514|The Invisible Orientation An Introduction to Asexuality|Julie Sondra Decker|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1411447547l/20344514._SY75_.jpg|28348968].
I really didn't want to write this review. I feel like some kind of traitor to the ace community for rating this anything lower than 5 stars, since it has so many glowing reviews. And it did have a lot of merit – I love how stories of POC and disabled ace people were featured.
However. Some aspects of this book... upset me. Probably because I am a small naive child. But I felt like I wasn't the intended audience of this book. It felt geared toward allosexual allies to spread awareness of the ace community more than it felt actually written for asexual people themselves, and I think aro or romantic asexual people who want a less conventional relationship than I do would be a better fit for this book than I was.
To clear things up: I am an asexual person who experiences romantic attraction, and not only that, but I want a rom-com worthy relationship with all the cheesy romantic trappings, except sex, which I am not open to at all and of which the very concept scares me. I didn't see myself in this book at all. Far from it – this book made me question if I am actually asexual since I want an extremely romantic relationship, and it also made me question if I actually experience romantic attraction since I'm not open to sex at all. This book literally made me cry three times, and books almost never make me cry.
Now, I'll summarize exactly what I did and didn't like:
What I did like:
- As I said, stories of POC and disabled ace people are showcased, focusing on the intersection of their various identities, which was quite enlightening.
- It was mostly very well written and easy to read. My only issue with the writing is how contradictory some of it seemed, which I'll mention in the what I didn't like section.
- I read it in only like 6 days, which is amazingly fast for me.
-I think the book as a whole had extremely good intentions and all the complaints I have are all unintentional on the author's part.
What I didn't like:
-The chapter on romantic attraction seemed off. The author says toward the end of the chapter that she is by no means saying that romantic and platonic attraction is the same thing, but throughout the chapter that seems like what she's implying, and throughout the whole book, romantic attraction seems kind of erased and portrayed as secondary and less important. Personally, I think there's more of a clear boundary between romantic and platonic attraction than the author makes it seem. It made romance seem less romantic and more technical, and I am such an innocent hopeless romantic child that that bothered me.
- Every single romantic couple mentioned in the book has had sex at some point, either on a regular basis, as part of some compromise (now the very word compromise scares me because of this book), or they used to do it in the past and later decided they didn't want to. It makes it seem like a queer-platonic relationship is the only option if you don't want to ever have sex. So I guess I'm going to be single forever then if having sex at some point is necesary to be in a romantic relationship.
- It is implied toward the end of the book that if ace people are accepted in society, the label asexual will be completely unnecessary and can then be done away with. I don't think that's what the author actually meant, but at any rate, that part didn't make any sense to me and made me upset for no good reason because I am extremely attached to the label asexual
-The writing in general is pretty contradictory in some places, as the last several points somewhat illustrate.
In summary, I have no idea what to think of this book. I went into it fully expecting to love it, not have multiple mental breakdowns over it.
Would I recommend it? Hmm, actually I think I probably would, believe it or not. It has a lot of good points in it, and it probably wouldn't upset most people anywhere near as much as it upset me. Besides, most people have rated it very highly. However, another book on the topic that I personally liked better and would recommend more is [b:The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality|20344514|The Invisible Orientation An Introduction to Asexuality|Julie Sondra Decker|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1411447547l/20344514._SY75_.jpg|28348968].
The Gravity of Us by Phil Stamper
Genre: Contemporary YA romance
My rating: 2.5/5 stars
Trigger warnings: Anxiety, depression, mention of death
Plot:
The plot was confusing and boring at the same time for most of the book. A lot of the time I didn't understand what was going on, and I didn't care at all anyway. Basically, NASA is threatened by a reality TV show and has to be saved...? Or something, I don't even know.
Characters:
Nothing was inherently wrong with any of the characters, but I wasn't invested in any of them at all. They all seemed really bland with not much personality to speak of.
Writing:
It's supposed to be so atmospheric with all the descriptions on the 1960's style decor, but I felt that the author put a lot more emphasis on useless descriptions than writing in a compelling way. Overall, the writing style is really bland and uninteresting (like most aspects of the book.)
Romance:
There is no relationship development because they are In Love ™ as soon they meet, and only a couple days after they meet, they kiss and are basically dating. Because of course that is very realistic and definitely how relationships actually work. Like every other part of this book, the romance was boring and not compelling at all.
Would I recommend it? Eh, no.
Genre: Contemporary YA romance
My rating: 2.5/5 stars
Trigger warnings: Anxiety, depression, mention of death
Plot:
The plot was confusing and boring at the same time for most of the book. A lot of the time I didn't understand what was going on, and I didn't care at all anyway. Basically, NASA is threatened by a reality TV show and has to be saved...? Or something, I don't even know.
Characters:
Nothing was inherently wrong with any of the characters, but I wasn't invested in any of them at all. They all seemed really bland with not much personality to speak of.
Writing:
It's supposed to be so atmospheric with all the descriptions on the 1960's style decor, but I felt that the author put a lot more emphasis on useless descriptions than writing in a compelling way. Overall, the writing style is really bland and uninteresting (like most aspects of the book.)
Romance:
There is no relationship development because they are In Love ™ as soon they meet, and only a couple days after they meet, they kiss and are basically dating. Because of course that is very realistic and definitely how relationships actually work. Like every other part of this book, the romance was boring and not compelling at all.
Would I recommend it? Eh, no.
The Cybernetic Tea Shop by Meredith Katz
Genre: Sci-fi romance
Short summary: A robot who owns a tea shop and a human fall in love.
My rating: 5/5 stars
Plot:
This isn't exactly a plot-driven book, but what plot it did have, mostly character development, was done beautifully. I don't think I've read such good character arcs in a long time.
Characters:
I've already mentioned the character arcs and development, so I'll try to focus on the characters themselves in this section.
Clara: She seemed like a real person to me. She had her own personality and never fell into stereotypes, and although this is only a novella, I felt as if I've known her forever.
Sal: My robot queen who must be protected at all costs. I liked her even more than Clara. The same things I said about Clara also apply to Sal.
Setting:
I love everything about the setting, especially everything relating to the robots and Raises. The Tea Shop was such a pivotal factor in the plot that I must appreciate it as well.
Other:
I love how the "asexual=robot" stereotype was subverted here, by being taken literally. We have a robot and a human, both of whom are ace, fall in love. It has to be the most beautiful romance I've ever seen.
This book touches upon a lot of themes and philosophical stuff as well that I'm not going to go into here, but it was all very well done and never took away from the story.
Would I recommend it? Yes, yes, yes. Get yourself a copy of it right now and read it.
Genre: Sci-fi romance
Short summary: A robot who owns a tea shop and a human fall in love.
My rating: 5/5 stars
Plot:
This isn't exactly a plot-driven book, but what plot it did have, mostly character development, was done beautifully. I don't think I've read such good character arcs in a long time.
Characters:
I've already mentioned the character arcs and development, so I'll try to focus on the characters themselves in this section.
Clara: She seemed like a real person to me. She had her own personality and never fell into stereotypes, and although this is only a novella, I felt as if I've known her forever.
Sal: My robot queen who must be protected at all costs. I liked her even more than Clara. The same things I said about Clara also apply to Sal.
Setting:
I love everything about the setting, especially everything relating to the robots and Raises. The Tea Shop was such a pivotal factor in the plot that I must appreciate it as well.
Other:
I love how the "asexual=robot" stereotype was subverted here, by being taken literally. We have a robot and a human, both of whom are ace, fall in love. It has to be the most beautiful romance I've ever seen.
This book touches upon a lot of themes and philosophical stuff as well that I'm not going to go into here, but it was all very well done and never took away from the story.
Would I recommend it? Yes, yes, yes. Get yourself a copy of it right now and read it.
What If It's Us by Becky Albertalli and Adam Silvera.
Genre: Contemporary YA romance.
Short Summary: Two boys meet at the post office and fall in love.
My rating: 3/5 stars.
Plot:
I think the main reason I didn't enjoy this book as much as I could have is because the whole plot is 100% romance (and a sappy romance at that), and I don't really like genre romance novels. I guess the plot was fine for what it is, though.
Characters:
I could barely tell Arthur and Ben apart. I kept getting them mixed up, to the point where I kept forgetting whose POV I was in.
Also, both Dylan and Arthur seemed creepy to me. Dylan called a girl he just met his "future wife" and Arthur was very stalkerish. Ben was okay though, if a bit bland.
Writing:
There were Harry Potter references everywhere, which got a bit annoying, but otherwise the writing was all right.
Other:
Here is where I appreciate the diversity. We have a gay Jewish boy with ADHD, a gay Puerto Rican boy, and a side character who is biromantic ace.
Would I recommend it? Maybe, especially if you like books that are 100% romance.
Genre: Contemporary YA romance.
Short Summary: Two boys meet at the post office and fall in love.
My rating: 3/5 stars.
Plot:
I think the main reason I didn't enjoy this book as much as I could have is because the whole plot is 100% romance (and a sappy romance at that), and I don't really like genre romance novels. I guess the plot was fine for what it is, though.
Characters:
I could barely tell Arthur and Ben apart. I kept getting them mixed up, to the point where I kept forgetting whose POV I was in.
Also, both Dylan and Arthur seemed creepy to me. Dylan called a girl he just met his "future wife" and Arthur was very stalkerish. Ben was okay though, if a bit bland.
Writing:
There were Harry Potter references everywhere, which got a bit annoying, but otherwise the writing was all right.
Other:
Here is where I appreciate the diversity. We have a gay Jewish boy with ADHD, a gay Puerto Rican boy, and a side character who is biromantic ace.
Would I recommend it? Maybe, especially if you like books that are 100% romance.