annoyingtiger888's Reviews (344)

This review may contain spoilers, so read at your own risk. This is more of my thoughts during the book rather than a traditional review. Also, I started reading this as an ebook and, halfway through, I bought a physical copy.

Starting this book, I wasn't sure what to think or what I was going into, but I really wanted to read it because it's listed as a classic and most people have read it during school, something which I didn't have the option to do.

My biggest annoyance with this book is the fact that most of the time, full names are used each time a character appears or speaks rather than just their first or last name. Given the fact that it takes me ages just to sound out the names, to begin with, it's fairly annoying having to repeat both first and last names every time that character appears.

About halfway through this book, I came to a simple conclusion: all of the men in this story are nuts. They talk on for ages and most of it is just jumbled nonsense. They're worse than a couple of old maids gossiping at the salon lol

Razumihin, for whatever reason, quickly became my favorite character. There was just something about him that drew me in, but I had to seriously rethink this the moment he met Dounia. He turned into a total neckbeard and reading it made me feel soooo uncomfortable. He definitely lost a lot of respect from me for that scene, yeesh.

Now, as stated in the beginning, I started this book as an ebook on Google Play because it was free but I hate reading digital books. It's just not the same as holding a physical copy in your hands, plus headaches, ugh. I really enjoyed this book so far, so I bought a physical copy and they seem to be quite different. The PC has been edited to make more sense and, at the time, I was faced with a choice - continue on with the digital copy which I wasn't fond of, or pick up halfway through the PC and let the cards fall where they may. I suppose both are saying the exact same thing, just in different wording, yeah? I chose the PC.

I can't stand Peter. He's so damn self-righteous and full of himself. I think he might even believe the bullshit that comes out of his mouth. Dounia can do so much better than this douchebag. It kinda sucks because I was actually rooting for him when he first made his appearance, and totally not just because I love his damn name. Peter Petrovich - beautiful name, ugly-ass man. He's the type that always has to have the last word and won't let anything go, he just keeps coming back for more.

"He failed to understand how others could not but admire him for his heroism."

I won't lie. I literally laughed out loud when I read this damn line. The NERVE of this man! He has such a god complex. Even thinking about it now, I'm trying not to laugh.

Now, I'm not sure if there's anything wrong with Rodia, if there is any, but I get the feeling that maybe he's depressed or feeling anxious. Then again, he's under a lot of stress so maybe it's not a disorder and it's just stress. Either way, I feel for him. I really fell for this character.

And can I just mention how fucking suspicious Porfiry is?? I honestly can't tell if he's being genuine or playing cat-and-mouse with Rodia and it makes me uncomfortable. It feels like the Cheshire cat swatting at a mouse. I don't know if he suspects him or if he's just weird and I know it's stressing Rodia out because it's stressing ME out by reading it.

There's a couple times when the story shifts to focus on people other than Rodia and when it does, it becomes so boring for me to read, like a chore I'm forcing myself to do that I'd rather avoid. It's strange because I feel super invested when Rodia is the center focus but the side characters, at least the ones chosen, I have no love for and I just don't care about them. By the way, Katherine is a total fucking bitch and I can't stand her. She reminds of me of Mean Girls 50 Years Later. Those poor kids, man.

I actually didn't hate Svidrigailov when he first appeared. I thought he was quirky and interesting, but my god. When he started talking about his 16-year-old fiance, I felt so creeped out. The way he talked about her and knowing how young she is, it was so fucking creepy. Now I can't think about anything else when he appears. Plus, his name is used so many damn times I found myself repeating his name in my head like a random song that starts playing in your head for no reason. So thanks for that, I guess.

Aaaaand his creepiness just hit the fucking roof when he tried to take advantage of Dounia! What the fuck, man. I would have been so pissed if he hurt her. His only redeeming quality is the fact that he let her go without hurting her. I mean, yeah he's being super generous with his money which is praise-worthy but that doesn't forgive the shitty way he acts and treats people. He could give away a lifetime of fortune but he'd still be a fuckin' creep.

"He began to undress her."

Reading this line while following his storyline made me feel sick to my stomach and my mind immediately went to the worse (as it typically does). I had a feeling he was going to kill himself, but I wasn't sure if the book was going to take that turn or not, but it did. Damn.

When it came to Pulcheria's death, that really struck my heart hard, I almost started crying. She was so distraught without even knowing the full extent of the situation. Maybe it was worse because she didn't know and her mind was able to run wild. That poor woman, may she rest in peace ='(

So, the physical copy of this book came with an Afterword by Robin Feuer Miller and he asks a few questions that I'd like to try and answer.

Q) Is this the ending to the novel that you expected?

Honestly, I wasn't sure what to expect with the ending. If I had to guess, I would have leaned more toward the side that he would keep holding the secret as opposed to turning himself in.

Q) Did the narrative tone of the epilogue jar you?

I didn't even really notice a difference, to be honest. It just felt more... rushed and jumbled together but I guess that makes sense since the story was officially over. It was just a kind of TL;DR of what happened after he turned himself in.

Q) Now that you have finished this novel, do you know why Raskolnikov committed his crimes? Has he really repented of them?

I don't. I don't think anyone can know for sure without walking in his shoes. Personally, I feel like he committed the murder, not for money, but because he wanted to see if he could get away with it. I want to believe he repented because I really do love him, but the pessimist in me says he doesn't and probably never will. He doesn't regret his choice and he would probably do it again if he had the chance to rewind time.

Q) Has he changed much from the character that he was at the beginning? If so, at what point did this change occur?

I feel like he changed a couple of times. He seemed fairly normal and relaxed at the beginning, but he quickly started to spiral into madness with emotions running high and he became super irritable, like a grumpy old man. The smallest thing would set him off. But then, when the time came, he started to show a bit of who he really is deep down, I think - the soft, caring Rodia as he hugged his mother. I feel like this is his true self, a warm caring man that he hides heavily behind moodiness and by shoving people away. Then I feel like he became super cold during the Epilogue like he was trying to pretend he had no feelings. Finally, in the very last portion of the Epilogue, it's like he became a whole new person. Like, he WAS a new person, it was strange.

Q) Why did you first decide to read this particular novel? What kept you reading it?

I chose to read this book because 1, it was free and 2, it's a classic. Lots of people have mentioned/praised this book, or have been forced to read it in school. Since I never got that opportunity and it was free, I decided to give it a shot.

Overall, I enjoyed this book and got really attached to the main character and his story, though I don't think it hit me as hard as it was meant to because I'm not very smart lol Most of it went over my head in terms of politics and psychology.

This review may contain spoilers. Read at your own risk. I would also like to say that I won this book via a giveaway on Goodreads (my first and only winner so far lol). I'm not sure if they are different, but this book is the advanced reader's copy.

The first thing I want to say about this book is that the cover is gorgeous and I'm not sure what they used to make it, but it doesn't feel like a normal book cover. It feels really cool and I like to touch it, which sounds weird but that's how it is lol

The first scene I want to talk about is the scene with them running away from the tanks. It was so damn intense, I swore for a moment I was watching an action scene playing out in a movie. I almost started crying when the horses got hurt, but I can't be mad at Emil. He was scared and trying to save his family! He even felt guilty about it and did his best to help mend their wounds, bless him.

One of the first things I thought about when I was a few chapters in was about how people always write about these supernatural creatures as these evil hellbent beings, but the real monsters, the real demons, are human beings. That's not to say this book talks about supernatural beings, it doesn't, but that's just what I thought about when they were describing the cruelty that was happening around them. This book just reinforces the fact that I would take a demon or a supernatural creature any day over a human being.

I think the scene that left me the most speechless was when Haussman shot at Emil. The way it was written, I was sure he had shot him dead and my mouth hung open in shock. I stopped and stared at that paragraph for a solid minute or so before I moved on. I was ready to cry, too, because I really love Emil. Such a good man and father!

"We come in with nothing, and we go out with nothing." - Emil Martel.

Now, let me say this - I am an atheist. I don't believe in god or religion at all. Not to say that's bad. If someone wants to believe or needs to believe in order to get through the hell that is life, then that's on them, I won't tell them otherwise unless they try to force it on me. Honestly, I just try to avoid it and I felt uncomfortable every time it was mentioned, but I understand. With everything the Martel clan went through, all the horrors they faced and saw, they needed something to believe in. I did find myself getting a bit annoyed at Adeline when she would get upset at Emil when he stopped believing. But as the book went on, she got better about it, which I'm thankful for because I really like Adeline. She's a damn good mother and a strong woman. I don't think I could have survived what she went through, she's a good role model.

Another part that was unbelievable was what happened to Rese. I was in shock at what had happened to her. No one deserves that mess, but Rese of all people? She was such a free spirit, so much fun and full of life. To go through something so traumatic and life-changing... I felt so sorry for her.

Karoline, on the other hand, is a character I'm perfectly satisfied with hating. She's such a bitch. Manipulative and self-centered. She doesn't care about anyone but herself and her own beliefs. What she said about Rese... I get being in shock but goddamn. That was too far. I really fucking hate her, even thinking about her pisses me off. How someone like her can raise such an amazing son such as Emil, I will never understand.

And Marie! Poor Marie, losing both of her babies in such a short time. I'm still shocked that she jumped into that truck and I hope whatever life that led her to, she was able to find some peace within herself.

I feel like the Martel clan splitting up was a bad idea. It's the first rule of any horror movie, you know? Never split up because you're much stronger together. It broke my heart when they separated, I really liked Adeline's side of the family. Though I felt betrayed on Adeline's part when her mother said those things about Emil.

I never went to school, so the things most human beings learned about history, I never did, so the things I read about in this book were... appalling. To think that the women had to hide out in a fucking church with the doors barred just to avoid being raped as a fucking reward of war... I mean, I know women weren't equal back then but that's just ridiculous. I would have flipped my shit if Adeline didn't talk her way out of being raped by that douchebag.

"When you suffer and curse your life, the Almighty listens closely. When you have no goodness in your heart or your prayers. No love. No calm. No desire to help others. No thankfulness for the miracle of your life. When you hold things like hatred or anger in your heart or envy or comparison, when life is all about how everything is unfair to me, me, me, the Divine understands those ancient languages of self-destruction, too. The thing is, the Universal Intelligence will help you even if your dreams come from a dark place, but the dreams will end up destroying you in the process. If you don't believe me, think of Hitler or any other tyrant. So live here, Martel. Love life like it is a miracle every day, every moment, and dream in a way that helps others." - Colonel Gheorghe

Colonel Gheorghe was a weird one when he first appeared, but my god is he one of the very best characters in this book. A wonderful and wise man and I'm so fucking happy he reached his dreams.

Finally, I was surprised when I heard that Emil was only getting .50