annoyingtiger888's Reviews (344)

What was that ending?? It just dropped off in a weird spot that makes the book feel incomplete. I know you're supposed to read these in order (which I didn't do) but it just feels like a weird way to end a book, even for a series.

The main story was pretty decent, I love the little chanting song they dead do. It hyped me up more than it should have lmao

"The bones, they crack. The bones, they creak. The men come alive in the briny deep. You ended our death, you ended our sleep. The men come alive in the briny deep."

I don't think I've ever read a book that has 107 chapters lol Actually, I think it's more because I don't think it counted the Interludes and Epilogue. It was such an awesome listen, though.

The story was well written, the plot was interesting and twisty, and the characters were all pretty decent. There were a few that annoyed the hell out of me, of course, but even they couldn't take away from that 5 star rating. The book was just too good and the narrator did a fantastic job, his voice is so calming to listen to.

This story was so long but so good and I wish there was more! Though, there are more books for me to dive into, so that's just as well. I don't know why but I adore Scotland Yard and I adore this period of England. Stories about either of these are just so fun to listen to and this author did such an amazing job.

There's also some great quotes, such as:

"Crime's changing and people are changing. This is just the start, mark my words. I think there's too many of us people and we're too close together. And we're turning on each other like rats in a gutter."

Ah, if only he could see things today, I wonder what he would say, then... This quote is relevant even in modern day!

While the majority of the book is fairly serious, there are a few moments that made me snort, such as:

- "Do you have your pistol on you, detective?"
- "I do."
- "Are you a good shot?"
- "I've never used it except for at practice."
- "That's not particularly comforting..."

I don't know if it was the narrator's delivery or what, but this interaction was just so fucking funny to me.

I'm so excited for book 2, to see the next case and to catch up with these cool characters. Who will stay? Who will go? How will things change? I want to know. I just hope the doctor and the dancing man stay around for a long time because I really liked those two characters!

This is a hard rate for me. On one hand, I want to give this book a 4 because it's funny, had some great quotes and it summed up the Florida experience pretty well. On the other, half the book had me bored to tears because it was not random quirky facts about Florida, but boring political nonsense that made me want to die.

This is the first book I've rated with half a star lol

Now, onto the quotes!

"Florida is out to kill us, so why not enjoy the time we have left? How is Florida trying to kill us? Let me count the ways. 1 - Florida is the lightning capital of the western hemisphere. [...] 2 - Florida is the shark bite capital of the world. Queue jaws theme. [...] 3 - Florida reigns surpreme among the states on the number of reported sink holes that open up and swallow everything on the surface. [...] 4 - Florida gets hit by more hurricanes than any other state. [...] So, put it all together - lightning, sharks, hurricanes, sink holes - and you can see why we're supposed to be the scariest state. And I didn't even mention the clown college in Sarasota."

I knew none of this lmao Well, I mean, I knew about the hurricanes, of course. And probably the sharks since we have so much coast. But sinkholes? And a mother fucking CLOWN COLLEGE? What the fuck, Florida.

"Given our vulnerability to hurricanes and flooding, where's the most dangerous place to live? The coast. Yet where do most of us live? The coast."

I will never understand this shit. How many times must your home be completely flattened, costing you hundreds of thousands of dollars before you finally stop building there?? Do these people just have stacks of cash sitting around, waiting to be burnt? 

"Now that you know all the ways Florida is trying to kill us all, you might wonder why people keep on moving here. The answer is simple, really - it's because we lie to them."

I have always wondered this. I was born and raised here and I HATE living in Florida. Shit's expensive as hell, there's way too many people here, there's way too many tourists on top of the people here, no one knows how to drive, there's mosquitos everywhere, each year gets hotter and more humid... It fucking sucks here and I wish I had the money to move.

The only good thing about Florida, in my opinion, is the rain that comes with hurricane season. Everything else sucks dick.

Stop coming here. It is not the tropical paradise you think it is. Go to California. Go bother to insane people over there instead. Stop retiring here. Stop moving here. Take Disneyland and stop visiting here.

"When I was teaching my teenager to drive, one thing I made sure he practiced was how to manouver through a road that's under construction. 'You need to know this because, at any one time, half of the roads you'll drive on will be under construction,' I said, inventing a dramatic statistic just to make sure he paid attention. 'And then when they're done with those, the road crew will begin work on the other half.' Despite my made up percentage, the fact is that a lot of Florida roads are under construction a lot of the time." 

Fucking FACTS, bro. Where is the lie?? I don't leave the house very often but every time I do, there is ALWAYS some kind of construction. And the funny part? The roads are still fucked up, despite them constantly being worked on. Find me a road without a pothole or dip, I dare you.

"We've got a water crisis, insurance crisis, environmental crisis and budget crisis to go with our housing crisis." 

Bruh, Florida IS the crisis 😭 

I will say, the experience of the author and my own personal experience doesn't fully sync up. It sounds like he he's had money to experience Florida properly - theme parks, springs, canoeing, camping, travelling, etc. I've done none of that because we've never had the money to spare.

Well, when I was a small child, we visited Busch Gardens once a year, but that stopped when my grandad died. I was 12, I think? Everything kinda went downhill from there. 

So, I guess Florida can be fun if you have money. If you're broke, this is just hell's courtyard.

I learned a lot of shit about Florida through this book and I couldn't help but smile at the stories I already knew (bath salts zombie, who?) I won't lie, though, I completely blacked out whenever he went on about political shit. I just don't care, especially given the stressful state of politics today. I came for the funny, dumb Florida stories.

I know, I know. You can't have a history about Florida without politics. Doesn't mean I have to like it, though.

I did not know this book would be told from the horse's point of view. I was quite confused when the book started, but I wasn't disappointed.

This was a great listen, showing both the horror and the kindness of humanity, told through the eyes of a horse. He met kind people who treated him well. He met assholes that treated him like a tool. And despite being separated from his human, he soldiered on.

I mean, it's not like he had much of a choice, really, but still. It was such a good book, proven by the fact that it made me smile, laugh and made my heart hurt all at the same time.

I have listened to, read and watched many different genres in my day, yet this is the first cozy apocalypse media I've come across. I didn't even KNOW there's cozy apocalypse. I've never stopped to think about it, really. I mean, when you think "apocalypse" you immediately think drama, violence, gore, etc. Right?

I wasn't disappointed though. As a lover of cozy mysteries, I'm happy to add "cozy apocalypse mystery" to my collection. It truly was a cozy mystery and I'm interested in the apocalyptic world that has been created for said mystery.

Well done 👏

This fucking book... oh my god. I haven't screamed and yelled at the sky over a book in a LONG time. If there's one thing I can say about this author, it's that she knows how to write a villain that just makes you want to scream and bash your head against the wall. 

Spoilers ahead because I'm losing my damn mind.

This bitch is an absolute PSYCHOPATH who needs to be locked away for life. I don't care that her husband saved your life. I don't care that, technically, she saved your life, too. She KIDNAPPED you, DRUGGED you, and was going to STEAL your goddamn BABY. Send that psycho bitch and her accomplish husband TO JAIL. They do not deserve a happy fucking ending and I'm pissed that the author gave them one.

Having part of this book told through the psycho's POV drove me crazy because she kept rationalizing what she was doing, saying she was doing the 'right' thing. Which okay, yeah, crazy people probably do think that but it still drove me crazy to listen to it!

"I'm not a psychopath." SAID EVERY PSYCHOPATH EVER.

Literally everyone in this book sucks except for the main character, the little girl (who does not deserve to be with two fucking crazy ass parents! Oh, she "passed" the mental health test? BULLSHIT she did) and the lawyer. Everyone else sucks and I hate them all.

Like goddamn, how much betrayal can you fit into one book? If the main character didn't also get a happy ending, I would think the author pictured the MC as someone she hates and was venting her frustration through this book. Like goddamn, give this chick a fucking break.

I am not happy about the ending. I am not happy with the MC letting these bastards go free just because they did ONE good deed in a sea of bad deeds. They should be rotting in jail with that bastard Simon and the MC's brother.

This book was alright, but it feels... incomplete? I don't like the way it ended and I feel like I'm missing out of something. I guess, in a way, the ending just doesn't feel very... fulfilling? 

On the bright side, this is one of the few LGBT books that features gay characters without preaching at you about it or insulting straight people. The fact that they're gay doesn't matter. They're just two human beings living their lives. It's rare to see these days and I applaud the author for it. 

Wasn't a bad story but it felt like it was longer than it needed to be with scenes that didn't really make much of a difference either way. Maybe it's my fault but I expected the queen to sneak around and solve the murder herself, so I was disappointed when she just delegated the job to her people instead.