Ahoy there mateys! Members of me crew may remember that I have a love for John Scalzi as he was featured in Broadside No. 5, tidings from the crew fer the dispatcher, and on the horizon fer the miniatures. As I work me way through all things Scalzi, I realized I had never read his first written novel.

His author’s note talks about how this book became published and states:

“It began in 1997 as my “practice novel” – that is to say, the novel I wrote to see if I could write a novel . . . I had no intention of ever selling it or ever really doing anything with it.”

Luckily for me he did eventually publish it. After one particularly rough day at sea, I decided that I needed a pick-me-up. So I picked up this novel (hardy har har!) It turned out to be the right choice fer me mood. Fer a “practice” novel, it was pretty darn good.

The novel concerns humanity’s first contact with extraterrestrial lifeforms. The aliens come to Earth looking to make friends. The only problem is that they are funny looking and smell real bad. The aliens are certainly not yer stereotypical little green men. So what better person to contact than a Hollywood agent to help spin their introduction to our world? Eventually the agency hands the task to junior agent Thomas Stein who has just had the best day in his career. It is his last best day for quite some time . . .

This first novel certainly contains Scalzi’s brand of zany humor, dialogue, and characters. While I like the main character’s ingenuity and caring, I also like the secondary characters. As usual there are strong and powerful women. Hooray! The is certainly nothing earth-shattering about this one but it is super enjoyable and while silly still has moments that make ye think.

I don’t suggest this as the first Scalzi book to be picked up by newcomers but fer those already established Scalzi fans, I certain recommend going back to this beginning.

Side note: I like the fun cover design!

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Ahoy there me mateys! I was trying to figure out what to read when I saw this old school cover in the hold . . .

The First Mate and his siblings fondly remember this series from childhood. And well I am an easy mark for all dragon-related things. So I gave this a shot. And I had very, very mixed thoughts. Be forewarned, unlike me usual posts, there are spoilers at the end because of a need to rant. Continue at yer own peril . . .

The book is set up in five parts:

The Student Union
Lundeyll
Pandathaway
Bremon
And Beyond

“The Student Union” starts out with a group of college age kids who play table-top role playing games in a club. I was never into that kinda gaming so it took me a bit to get into the novel. But of course the players end up transported into the game world which is actually an alternate magical universe. While the characters are rather stereotypical, I did find the students’ entrance and introduction to “Lundeyll” to be comical. From accidentally destroying their supplies, to having split personalities while coming to terms with the mingling of their real and character memories, the beginning of the magical adventure made me happy. Plus there were a few unexpected surprises.

The third part when they are journeying to the great city of “Pandathaway” is where the story started to go off track slightly. This is where the love interest plotlines start to really kick in. While the good news is that women in this 1983 novel can and do choose to sleep with multiple sexual partners if they want to, the men sulk like whiny babies and get all macho and protective and annoying. It was a glimpse of things to come. However I did like the wonderful library in the city and Doria haggling in the market and we get to meet our first dragon. Arrrr! I loved the silly dragon and its use in the city. Made me laugh that the dragon in the book is described as brown with red glowing eyes. Doesn’t match the cover at all.

After an extremely unexciting tournament (how can sword fighting be boring!) the group heads towards “Bremon” and the book enjoyment soured. Why ye ask? Because 1) it is just wandering with no real seeming purpose and more importantly 2) rape becomes a plot point. The strong men sit in a wagon and listen to the women being raped for hours. While it is certainly not graphic in the telling, it is completely irrelevant to the story and exists only to make the men feel revengeful, protective (after initially failing), remorseful, and so worse yet there can be a burden the men have to handle for the next segment. Sigh.

So okay now that the strong women have been reduced to quivering husks now what? The men get revenge! Which happens off the page and ends up with a head in a bag. Huh? Then more boring traveling. Then onto the a place “guarded by the most terrifying and deadly enemy of all!” Which is the promised dragon of the title. Who DOES NOTHING. Seriously it really does sleep while almost all the characters sneak past it. This supposed first dragon, THE dragon, doesn’t even twitch when a horde of people go past him. Its whole purpose it to GUARD the gate. Some terror. Some deadliness. It wakes up just in time to spit some flame. A super boring dragon! Urgh!

“And Beyond” that, the book got even worse. I won’t even get into it. I finished it because it was short and was remembered with fondness and I just didn’t get it. I guess I am too old and curmudgeony to suspend any real disbelief at the plot and only find meself disbelieving that this series is beloved by so many folk.

I did have the first mate tell me the continuation of the plot in the later novels. I am mystified that there are any people who are fond of this and all I can say is that me head hurts and I will be avoiding them indefinitely.

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Ahoy there me mateys! I received this young adult fantasy eARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. So here be me honest musings . . .

This is one of those books hopping around the blogosphere due to the excitement of a retelling of Snow White with a queer twist and its feminist leanings. Aye, had to check this one out. Plus it has a simplistic yet evocative cover.

Overall I thought it was a likeable story. This is not a book heavy on action or suspense. It also was a little bit confusing at first due to the nature of the flashbacks. At its heart this book seemed to be about family betrayal, overcoming familial obligations, and women choosing how to embrace their future selves and overcome their pasts. Personally I didn’t feel that the story was that feminist in tone because for the majority of the novel the three main women in the story seemingly have their entire lives and personalities dictated by the men in their lives. The women don’t really seem to fight at all for what they believe in and how they gain control in the end was rather lackluster. Also the queer relationship, while lovely, was certainly not even the secondary plot.

While I found all three women to be somewhat unique characters with the potential for inner strength, I felt that the story telling did not really do them justice. The pacing was a bit slow, the world building a bit flat, and the magic system not nearly explored enough. The age of the characters also seemed off. All the women came across as young, inexperienced, and naive. The villain wanted power for power’s sake. The loving father ended up being creepy. The flashback romance aspects of the novel were me least favorite portion. I wanted a fuller rendition of the world, characters, and the magic in particular. I didn’t know it was a debut before readin’ but some of these flaws seem in line with that fact.

That said I loved the huntsman and stepmother’s relationship and history. I adored how the mirrors and their symbolism were used in the story. I thought the relationship between the stepmother and princess was lovely in its complexities. The author’s mixing of fairy tale elements was clever. I am glad I read it but it is by no means a favorite. I wouldn’t reread this novel but I would check out more of the author’s work.

So lastly . . .

Thank you Flatiron Books!

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Ahoy there me mateys! Now sit back and hear me tale of why wendy @ the biliosanctum is to blame fer this adventure. In fact the crew members of the bibliosanctum trio get me into a lot of trouble and introduce me to new worlds, situations, and ports fer plunder all the time. It’s why I like em. But I digress . . .

So one day I was perusing the lists of potential treasure finds by me crew when I came across wendy’s description of “App Review: The City’s Thirst by Max Gladstone.” I thought I recognized the author. So I took a look-see. Well turns out I was thinking of the author Max WIRESTONE whose work I have read before. But I digress again . . .

So the first line of wendy’s pitch was “Remember reading Choose Your Own Adventure books as a kid?” Ummm yes I do! Wendy sure knows how to get me attention. So I read a little further. Apparently Max GLADSTONE has written a choose yer own adventure text-based app set in his Craft Sequence World. I knew nothing about the world or the author but I know I love to choose my own adventure. So I set off to have one . . .

So of the two Craft adventures that are described by wendy’s missive, I thought I would take a gander at this one:

"Choice of the Deathless: 'Battle demons and undead attorneys, and win souls to pay back your student loans! At the elite demonic-law firm of Varkath Nebuchadnezzar Stone, you’ll depose a fallen god, find romance, and maybe even make partner, if you don’t lose your own soul first.'"

Awesome right? So I gather up me kindle, download the app, and proceed to get sucked into me life at the law firm. Only one problem – it was an introductory taste before I hit a pay wall. Just when the going was getting very interesting too. I was rather irked to say the least. I wanted more of this interesting life in the firm! Why didn’t wendy warn me? So I went back and read her pitch. Only to find out that she did in fact warn me but as usual I rush into adventure without paying attention to the details. But I digress some more . . .

While rereading wendy’s warnings properly this time I did see this:

'Both games benefit from some passing knowledge of Gladstone’s unique world of gods, souls, undead, and legalities. By nature of the format, there is not really a lot of time given to descriptions and world building so there are a lot of blanks to fill in. I suspect the basics could still be handled by someone who has not fully immersed themselves in the Craft Sequence, but it certainly helps to be familiar with the major players of the various firms and their ultimate goals within each realm."

Well even though I could very well handle the basics without prior knowledge (and loved it!), I thought that mehaps I should listen to wendy’s excellent advice the second time around and read the first book before I rejoined the law firm. So I did . . .

I had no idea what I was getting into. I absolutely frickin’ adored this book. Now I am not usually an urban fantasy fan but between me thwarted first app attempt and this gem of a book, I was completely and utterly enthralled with the world of the Craft Sequence. The world building, characters, mystery aspects, gods, politics, and lawyering were absolutely wonderful. This is one of those times where I am reminded how much I adore me book blogging crew and would have a lesser life if not fer their contributions to me treasure hunts.

The book centers around a city called Alt Coulumb that was run by the God, Kos. Was being the key word because he is now dead. The firm of Kelethres, Albrecht, and Ao is hired to attempt to find out who killed the God and bring Kos back to life if they can. Of course it is way more complicated than that. And it’s the pesky details that make it wonderful.

Most of the story centers around Tara who is a first year associate. She is snarky, intelligent, crafty, and just plain fun. Definitely how I like me friends. Her Boss is kick-ass and the priest assigned to help the firm is the best type of naive and sweet and intelligent wrapped up.

I am slightly sad because I cannot really do this book justice and explain any further with me paltry words. I am a fighting gal not a poet. But suffice to say that I will be reading all of the other books and certainly be buying the app so I can finish me lawyerin’ adventures. Arrrrrr!!!!

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Ahoy there me mateys! This young adult novel caught me eye because many many crew members wouldn’t stop talking about how funny it was. I was informed it was a young adult historical fiction that veers off from the historical and into the hysterical.

In these rough seas of the past couple months, I felt I could use some laughter so I picked up a copy. And I did mostly enjoy it. Jane of course is the highlight with her book obsession, sassy wits, and intelligence. It was worth reading this book just so I could get to know this version of Lady Jane Grey. Also I loved King Edward VI and Gifford. The relationships of these three characters were sweet and charming. However even the secondary characters were fun and integral to the plot which is always nice to see.

The first part of the novel mostly takes the correct history and then twists it. Adds magic. Woohoo! This part was my favorite. In fact I loved the whole section up until Jane’s marriage. Then the book lagged for me until it was time for the group to storm and retake the castle. It’s not to say that I hated the middle of the book but it was slow and there was a lot of waiting around and wandering in the woods (a bit of a pet peeve).

I don’t think I loved the book enough to read any more of this series but it certainly was a quick, light, and entertaining read. I am impressed at how smooth the storytelling and character voices were even though three authors worked on this book.

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Ahoy there me mateys! I received this young adult sci-fi eARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. So here be me honest musings . . .

Arrrrrr mateys this book be amazing! It has been compared to maze runner and illuminae. While I read both and enjoyed them, this one blows the competition out of the water. The characters are diverse, the plot is enthralling, the pace is blazing, the tension is fierce, and the story drew its hooks in me and wouldn’t let go.

Ten poor kids from all over Earth have been recruited by a corporation called Babel to travel to a distant planet to help mine a substance called nyxia. In doing so, they immediately benefit their families back home. There is one catch – they have to compete on the journey to earn the spots to be part of the final mission. Only 8 out of 10 will proceed.

The story is told from the perspective of Emmett. He is an awesome protagonist who is determined to win but finds himself questioning the other players, the terms of the competition, and his own thoughts and motivations. Even though we see the world through Emmett’s eyes, we still manage to learn plenty of the other characters and their motivations as well. I particularly loved Bilal and Kaya.

The substance nyxia is crazy. I loved how it was used in space life and in the trials. There are also the hints of potential uses in the future. It kinda creeps me out and fascinates me all at the same time.

This novel takes some of the tropes of the dystopian sci-fi young adult novels and turns them upside down. Also this has one of the best endings of a book one in a trilogy that I have read in a very long time. I cannot wait to get me hands on book two.

So lastly . . .

Thank you Crown Books for Young Readers!

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Ahoy there me mateys! I have no idea where I first heard about this book but it sounded like a prince and pauper type story so it went onto the ports fer plunder list. I love those types of fairy tales and was excited to pick this one up. It turned out to be a fun romp that I read in one night.

There are two girls who eventually do switch places. The highlight of this book for me was Elara. She is feisty and determined. I particularly liked the way in which she interacted with her foster family in the beginning of the novel. The other girl, Princess Wilha, had her best moments in the second half of the book but overall seemed bland in comparison to Elara.

While this book was fast-paced, it does have lesser elements. Two in particular were the romances and the plot problems. The romances were mostly surface and not really developed in depth. I liked the guys involved. I just wish they didn’t feel so two dimensional. The plot was also clumsy. The reason for the princess wearing the mask seemed farfetched. A lot of the events seemed disjointed. So many improbable things just fall into place. Both main characters make odd choices that just seem to move the plot along. I would have liked a little more depth to the characters’ motivations. I also wish there had been more about the relationship between the two girls. Though I did not expect that ending at all which was fun.

Despite the flaws, I enjoyed it enough to read the sequel.

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Ahoy there me mateys! I received this young adult fantasy eARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. So here be me honest musings . . .

This novel is about a young gender-fluid adult in a competition to become a court assassin for the purposes of revenge. Should have been a perfect catch but ended up being such a disappointment that I hereby decree that this book must walk the plank! Be forewarned dark opinions abide below . . .

Now this book is getting comparisons to Sarah J. Maas and Leigh Bardugo. Now as I thought that throne of glass was an atrocity of storytelling only worth existing so I could read Liam @ heyashers!, snarky read-along, I was hoping it would fall on the Bardugo side of the spectrum. I can definitively say that it did not.

It certainly is a better version of throne of glass. I mean the assassins at least compete and the clothes and romance are not the sole focus of the main character. Sal is assured of her skills and does use her brain occasionally which is nice. But overall she is not a compelling character. She seems to have no other major thoughts except for revenge and comes across as rather flat. Also for someone with no major education except street smarts, her lack of real struggling to learn and adapt to the court world and political society seem unrealistic at best.

The politics and world building also fall rather flat. I know that there is a young-ish queen struggling to keep her kingdom going but all the interesting political wrangling seemed to have occurred before the novel takes place. As does the magic. Magic has been banished from the land and the hints we get of it seemed tantalizing but nothing is truly explained. The info-dumping that does occur just leaves more questions. There is no real explanation of how the court functions, how any of the laws work, etc. The world structure seemed superfluous. I was hoping for more than that.

I wanted to abandon this book many many times because it was so not what I wanted. I kept reading for three reasons:

- Sal is gender-fluid. This is the first young adult book I have read with a gender-fluid character. I tend to see gender-fluidity dealt with a bit more in adult sci-fi. I wanted to see how this was incorporated for the main character throughout. I am not gender-fluid so I am not sure if this portrayal works for someone who is (and would LOVE to get that viewpoint) but overall I found this element lacking. I was glad to have Sal be gender-fluid. Inclusion of diverse elements is always wonderful. But with the exception of a couple of secondary characters, Sal spends most of the time being afraid of who she is. I would have liked to see more personal growth from Sal and those around them on this issue rather than just discussing how their outfit determined the pronoun used. Of course that may come in the next book . . .

- I rather enjoyed the secondary characters of Sal’s love interest and also Sal’s assistant. In fact I wanted the story to switch from Sal’s perspective to theirs. I knew it wasn’t going to but I was happy every time I got to spend time with either of those secondary characters.

-It was obvious who was going to win the competition, but I wanted to see what the set-up for the next novel was going to be. While there were twists in the story, (mostly because the assassin competition rules made no sense) I kept hoping that the cliche setting and flat characters were going to redeem themselves somewhere. I wanted a powerful ending. It didn’t happen for me.

So basically I will not be reading any further books in this series. The inclusion of diverse characters and me enjoyment of the secondary characters means that I may give the author’s future series/works a chance. But this one did not float me boat.

So lastly . . .

Thank you Sourcebooks Fire!

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