sarahthegaymer's Reviews (305)

This was my Book Club’s pick for the month of May. I was SO excited to dive into a fairly new Thriller as that was something we hadn’t done yet! (Note: I was only 2/3 through when we got to book club and finished it after our meeting.)

I’d been having a rough May, not really finding a lot of things I liked and I even DNF’d about 3-5 books between platforms. I’m not sure if it was finals stressing me out, or work being busy, but I just could not get in the mood to read. This book changed that and got me out of my slump and renewed my love of Thrillers! 

This story is primarily following 3 girls who years ago survived some pretty horrific trauma and have been living with it ever since. Another big event brings them back together where they’re forced to relive the past - and there are some things that were better off left unsaid. 

Even though there was a large cast of secondary characters, I feel that the overall character development of this book was done really well. I don’t think there was a character I really hated and they all gave me *pings* to think that they ‘might’ have been a suspect or were responsible for some of the things that happened. Because of this, there were a lot of times where I thought the story was going to lead in one direction only to be totally flipped and I was like; “Damn, I was so off!”

Highly, highly recommend! A fast-paced page turner that I couldn’t put down.

Solid 3-stars. (If you’re a fan of this book, this review is probably going to upset you.)

So, I went into this book with really high expectations because it’s so popular by BookTubers, BookTok’s, etc. It’s an older book, and I missed the hype when it published but given that people STILL talk about it I figured it was worth reading. 

I went in preparing for a wild roller-coaster ride at like Cedar Point or Six Flags. What I got was the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad at Walt Disney World. We went up & down, up & down, had a really big hill, crashed to the bottom but we never picked up any speed. Truthfully, I had to force myself to the finish line but I knew it was a must finish.

I can’t really say too much because I feel like anything I say is going to be *spoilery*, especially if you haven’t read it. 

I feel like it deserves three stars for a couple of reasons:
1. I finished it & didn’t hate it.
2. There are some really big plot twist but from my perspective, there aren’t any plot holes which is definitely a bonus.
3. I couldn’t help but kinda love Amy no matter what she did.

Maybe if I hadn’t read so many other Thrillers that I viewed as 5-stars, and I read this years ago when it was first published and being raved about, my rating would have been higher. But, I feel like everything that happens in this book has happened in some capacity but it’s all sort of thrown into one book, here. 

I will also note that I listened to the Audiobook, and I think that helped up the rating as well because I had to listen and wait to see what was going to happen next. I wasn’t able to scan ahead with my eyes and spoil something in the next paragraph or page! 

Overall, I say it’s worth giving a shot! 

What in the actual fuck did I just read? 

I have so many follow-up questions. So, so, so many questions. 

Let me be clear, I don't think I like this book. But it was so...catastrophic that I had to give it 4 stars because as much as I was reading it and saying, "What the fuck?" I kept reading because I wanted to know what was going to happen next and if I was going to be hit with some major plot twist. Which. We sort of were, I think? I'm not sure. 

So, yeah; that is all I really have to say about this. If you're interested in a wild and crazy ride that will likely leave you speechless, this is the book for you. 

I'm thinking there were likely some things that were like metaphoric or hidden meanings, but I must be too stupid to have understood that or realized that. 

So, yeah..enjoy, Bunny!

Let me start this off by saying that I was in a MAJOR reading slump - my worst of the year so far - before coming into this book. I think I had started & put down 2 physical books and 4 audiobooks. I don't know what was happening...

I am a super huge fan of cozy mysteries. When this was recommended I immediately went out and bought it but took my sweet time waiting to read it. I am so glad that I finally was able to pick this up and draw myself out of the slump I was in. 

Veronica Speedwell is goals! (I mean, maybe aside from searching for butterflies but maybe in another life..) She is a strong female character who is confident in herself and what she wants & I can really appreciate reading about a character like that - especially when they don't come across as a 'bitch', just strong! 

Stoker, and the relationship he has with Veronica is also impeccable. Every woman should strive to have a Stoker (in any form) in their life; always going along with even the craziest ideas while knowing they're crazy but knowing they care and trust you enough that they'll be there right along with you.

We're watching the two of them try and solve the mystery of Veronica's heritage and how to stop the multitude of people who are pursuing them and want them dead. 

While I overall really enjoyed the story; I gave it four stars instead of five because there were a few spots where I felt it was overall a little chaotic and that it took a LONG time to get somewhere with the story. I understand setting the scene and that they needed to 'hide out' due to things that had happened, I just felt like that part was dragging on for a little long. 

Overall, I super enjoyed this dynamic duo and am looking forward to the diving into the rest of the series at some point!

"Once your goodbye is perfect, you have to leave me and not look back. Life your life..it's an awful thing to miss someone whose still here."

"A great brain can never be kept on Earth."

Holy shit. Fredrik Backman...sir who hurt you? Why do you do this to us? Why do we keep doing it to ourselves. 

I've read/listened to 3 things by this author and each has destroyed me in it's own way. I have a few more on the shelf but I think I'll have to take a little break before I decide to dabble any further. 
Coming in at just about an hour; this is a beautiful novella that dabbles with one gentlemen's struggle with dementia and his family's struggle to care for him in this difficult time. 

Proceed with caution. As someone who has worked in healthcare and experienced dementia firsthand, and someone that has (had) a close relationship with my grandparents; this just hits in a away I was not prepared. 

That's all I have to say. You've been warned.

The third installment in the Wayward Children series by Seanan McGuire, we find ourselves back and Eleanor West's school for Wayward Children - at least for a couple chapters, that is! 

While these novellas 'could' be read as stand-alone's, I definitely recommend reading the first novella in the series before this one as there are some cross-references that might not make complete sense otherwise. 

When a seemingly magical girl falls from the sky landing in the Turtle Pond, she convinces the students, and Eleanor, that the world of Confection NEEDS their help. Without question; Kade, Cora, Nadya, and Christopher take off on an adventure with a rough center and bittersweet (ha!) ending. 

As a forever chubby girl with a sweet tooth, (whose favorite childhood game is admittedly Candyland) Confection is my kind of world. I love the nonsense it brings and thing that so far, it would be my most favorite door (or home) to visit! I also loved that some of my favorite characters from the first novella were brought back for the adventure! 

As with novella #2, I don't want to give too much away - but again, this is your sign to READ THE DAMN SERIES. What are you waiting for?! 

Oh, Notes on an Execution....
I had to sit with this one for a while before giving it my final review (and if I'm being truthful, I still don't know if I'm giving this book the rating and review it deserves because I just can't make a 100% decisive decision). Let me start with saying that I think a large part of my disappointment in this book is due to the fact that while I'm not sure what I 'thought' I was going to read, it was not what I actually read. The only information I had about this book was from a trusted BookTuber who rated it their top book of 2022. So, for me, that was enough praise and conviction to go ahead and make the impulse purchase. And, I'm pretty proud of myself because I pulled this off the shelf AHEAD of other anticipated reads because I was that excited to dive into it. Ultimately, I was disappointed. While I was reading it, there were a lot of times where I wanted to 'DNF' the book and move on, but something kept me going. Maybe it was because I was hoping it would end different, or there was some big plot twist that would be worth it (there was not). Immediately after finishing the book, I graciously gave it 2 out of 5 stars (and I wanted to give it 1). As I sat with it a little longer and came back to write up this review, I went ahead and bumped my rating to a 3 out of 5 stars. I don't really have an explanation for the increase in one whole star other than the fact that as much as I sit here and claim that I disliked the book; it's sticking with me for some reason and that must be accounted for in my honest opinion. All of this is to say; I just don't think the book was 'for' me, or maybe I just didn't get out of it what I was suppose to; but I don't think it was terrible, or horrible, or that you shouldn't read it yourself. 

Now, onto the book..
Basically in this book you're following Ansel Packer, a serial killer who is living the last 12 or so hours of his life before being given a lethal injection in order to 'pay' for the price of his crimes. While a large majority of the book is obviously surrounding him and the emotions/thoughts he's experiencing leading up to his end; that's not the only perspective you have. You are also seeing perspectives from Ansel's mother who gave him up (it's always the Mother), the twin sister of the woman that Ansel ultimately marries (or lives with - I honestly can't remember), and the cop who knew Ansel in the foster home and is hellbent on proving he committed these heinous crimes. You also get a brief insight into the lives of Ansel's sister-in-law and niece, later on in the story. 

This story is told from each of their perspectives; from their first (and later) interactions with Ansel; to how they feel about him being executed. Each of these perspectives help to paint the picture of who Ansel is, or was, and their feelings towards what he is facing. These perspectives are being told simultaneously as you watch the countdown to the end of his life tick closer and closer and closer..
While I would agree that multiple perspectives are necessary for this book and the story it was trying to tell, I'm going to be completely honest and express that I feel that a lot of the information being given was just 'filler' information and I'm not sure that it was necessary to the story being told (If I'm brutally honest - I don't think it was). Each of the perspectives were unique in their own way, and in some way that I'm unable to identify, 'might' have been necessary. Again, I just can't make a decision to if they were or were not.

While I don't have a lot of positive things to say, one thing I can give praise for is the author's ability to take a touchy (read: strong opinion subject) and write about it in a way that doesn't attempt to sway or help formulate your opinion. They're simply just writing the story and allowing you to draw your own conclusions and feelings. While I don't typically read books with an opinion that is opposite my own; I feel like this book allows you to read the story and get something no matter what side of the spectrum you're on regarding capital punishment. If you're for it; it may allow you to see some ways that would make you think twice. If you're against it; this story may allow for you to see some ways that would make you be in favor of it. It might confuse you more. Your opinion might stay the same. But, I ultimately like that the decision is yours and no one can make you feel otherwise; right or wrong. 

The story line wasn't overly boring, though there were parts that to me felt like they were dragging. I'd find myself zoning out while reading and forcing myself to pick it up and 'power through' to finish. I've been really good about putting down books that I'm just not jiving with - and while I felt like this was a 'non-jive' book; I kept going because as I mentioned previously; I wanted to see it through in hopes something else would happen. Multiple perspectives helped, because when I found was becoming uninterested or frustrated with one particular character, there was a good chance that the next chapter was circling back to someone else; making it worth while. 

Finally, my intention here is not to deter anyone from reading the book if they so choose. I'm sure there are a lot of people out there who like the book, or even love the book; it's just not me. It's not really a thriller or cozy mystery; it sort of stands alone. I guess if I had to label it - it's perhaps Literary Fiction? I'm honestly not even sure. 

If you're looking for a book with a heavy topic, that allows some intellectual perspective/thoughts on the subject matter; I recommend it. If you're not looking for a 'slow-burn' book and appreciate things that make you think outside the book; then this might be the one for you.

The second installment in the Wayward Children series by Seanan McGuire, I simply couldn't wait any longer to dive in. 

This story is following Jillian and Jacqueline (you meet them in Every Heart a Doorway), twins who were born to parents who should have never been parents, and are forced to attempt to mold into the visions their parents had for them. When their door appears, they head off to a world that holds a different life for each of them - the Moors.

Jacqueline, now going by Jack, easily decides to become an apprentice to Dr. Bleak and finds her time in the Moors full of learning and loving. 

Jillian, now going by Jill (get it? Jack and Jill), decides to stay with the "Head" of the Moors, a vampire, eager to grow and become an adult so that she can find eternal love with him. 

This novella will give you a beautiful, yet heart-breaking background into their lives and their time in the Moors, which is obviously before they arrive at Eleanor West's home for Wayward Children.

I don't think this book was "as good" as the first in the series, but I don't want to say much more as to not give too much away.

I am here to tell you that if you only plan on reading one nonfiction book in all of 2023; COMING HOME IS THE ONE!!! 

Sawyer is a beautiful person who shares their heart and soul with us in this moving memoir. They happen to be trans non-binary.

In a world where being yourself can be detrimental to your well-being and safety, Sawyer lays it all out there on the table. While I am not trans or non-binary, so much of what Sawyer has to say resonated with my "upbringing" and "coming out". (Let me just say I tabbed the SHIT out of this book). Religion. People turning their backs on you because you no longer fit the mold they had created for you. How those of us in the LGBTQIA+ community are CONSTANTLY 'coming out of the closet' and that we're currently trying to be shoved back in, indefinitely. Trying to love yourself. Man, the feels are just so fucking strong here. 

I encourage everyone to purchase this book - especially if you're not a member of the LGBTQIA+ community. I encourage you to take the time to read Sawyer's memoir and TRY to understand what is happening in the world (mostly, the United States) around us and why it's so important that we don't celebrate, nor erase, the existence of trans people. My hope for you is that reading this memoir will make you remember the most important fact: Trans, Lesbian, Gay, Asexual, however someone identifies - we are still fucking people and still having feelings. These feelings matter. 

We are valid. Always. (And any platform of mine is always, always, always a safe space - feel free to reach out.)

This story had me laughing and crying. The tears, I mean..lit-er-al tears.

It made me realized that sometimes we do need to give some people a little grace with learning - it doesn't have to be all or nothing. It's when people don't or stop making an effort; that's when it matters.

It reminds me that while our stories don't define us, they help mold us.

It reminds me that family doesn't need to be blood. You are under no obligation to explain yourself to anyone for any reason. 

It reminds me that it's alright to just be.

It reminds me that therapy - especially today - is your friend.

Anyways, congrats to Sawyer on a bang-on job and I commend your courage and resilience. I hope to one day have the courage to put my own story out there for the world to read.

The Swifts is definitely a family I would love to be a part of! 

This is a middle grade story that I was apprehensive but hopeful about. A trusted BookTuber had posted it and while I didn't know much about it, my Goodreads search revealed this line: 
"On the day they are born, every Swift child is brought before the sacred family dictionary. They are given a name and a definition, one it's assumed they will grow up to match. Unfortunately, Shenanigan Swift doesn't much like being told what to do." The rest was history, I needed to have it. Then, Sam bought it for me as a surprise and I opened it without finishing what I was currently working on. 

In this book, we're following Shenanigan Swift on her quest to solve a mystery during the Swift family reunion. In this cozy mystery, chaos ensues in the best possible way and I love everything that this book stands for. It's a fast-paced and easy read that you don't realize is a Middle Grade when you're reading it. It also discusses some 'big' topics that put it in a simplistic and easy way to understand. If you have Middle Grade readers and are a decent human being, this might help you start or engage in some conversations that are necessary. 

One of the biggest conversations is surrounding gender and pronouns. For example, Erf, one of the Swift cousins that is similar in age to Shenanigan is non-binary and has changed their name. After Shenanigan sees Erf in some distress about the name tag that her Grandmother had given them, this was their conversation:

"Why don't you want to wear your name badge?"
Erf looked warily at Shenanigan, as if they were expecting an argument. "Because Gran calls me by my Dictionary name, but I'd rather be Erf."
"Is 'Erf' like a nickname?"
"Not really. It's just my name. I picked it."
"Oh." Shenanigan hadn't known you were allowed to do that. "I also wanted to ask if you were a boy or a girl earlier, but I wasn't sure if that was a rude question. Is it a rude question? I've never met anyone new before, so I'm not really sure how to do it."
"It's okay. Meeting new people is hard for me too. And, um, I'm not a boy or a girl."
Shenanigan hadn't know you were allowed to do that, either. "Well then, hi, Erf. We're cousins!"

*THIS IS HOW YOU DO IT.*  Throughout the book, Beth Lincoln continues to us they/them pronouns when referring to Erf. Yes, it's really that simple.

Later in the story, Erf has a conversation with another older cousin, Fauna who I believe is transgender. It's a heartwarming conversation, but most important are these two quotes.

1. When Erf is asking Fauna if it was hard getting people to listen to her.."Sometimes." Fauna sipped her tea. "There will always be people who think they know you better than you know yourself. But I quickly learned that they don't matter; the people who love you are the people who listen..."

2. When confronting the idea of Erf telling their Gran.."I just don't know if Gran will let me."
[Fauna replies] "Your gran doesn't get a say in who you are. No one in the world makes that decision but you."

Throughout the book there are also a lot of other mentions of found family and guardians that are not necessarily parents. It shows the unique love between siblings. It shows that being you is enough. Always. And in between all of this is a cozy mystery! 

So, so good! I highly, highly recommend it for YOU and your Middle Grade readers!