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just_one_more_paige

Jade Legacy

Fonda Lee

5.0

adventurous dark emotional tense medium-paced

Plot or Character Driven: A mix

Strong character development: Yes

Loveable characters: Yes

Diverse cast of characters: Yes

Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

I did it! This chonk of a book, over 700 pages, is the final installment of the Green Bone Saga...and I have conquered it! It took me an extra four renewals at the library (thank goodness for staff privileges and no one else having it on hold - the guilt of someone else waiting would have really stressed me out). I buried myself deep into it over the recent Holiday long weekend and, once I gave myself that space and time to settle in, got through the final two thirds in just two days. And what a finale it was!

In Jade City, the story focused on the city of Janloon, in the country of Kekon, introducing us to the Kaul family, leaders of the No Peak clan and their rival Mountain clan. In Jade War, the story moves outward, as other countries get involved in the fight for dominance of jade, the substance that enhances a person's innate physical/intuitive abilities, and No Peak and Mountain start leveraging international influence against each other in sort of proxy wars. And here in Jade Legacy, the focus is split between the intra- and extra- national struggles for power. As the Kaul family grows, despite familial angst and drama, they stand together against all their enemies: the Mountain clan in particular, and in defense of Kekon against outside interests in general. While at the same time, the Mountain clan, whose ruthlessness and willingness to partner with any ally, has long been a step ahead in their years-long feud, seems on the verge of finally "winning" in the fight to control Kekon and the jade trade worldwide. However, the Kaul family has a few final moves to make, that could prove with finality that family is the strongest of all powers, and with a new generation of leaders on the horizon, maybe it actually is possible to move beyond grudges and vengeance in partnership for a better future.

Y'all, the scope of this novel is extraordinary. Never once, in the 700+ pages, did I think that it was too long or wish for it to end faster. It was a page-turning rollercoaster of emotions and nonstop action (violence and tension and kidnapping and politics and loss and grief and so much drama) from start to finish. There was all the violence and political maneuvering that we've gotten used to, but with messy and complex and deeply human relationships (Shae and Woon, Hilo and Wen, Niko and his whole family/legacy, Ayt Mada and Shea, Anden and his role within the family) smoothly interwoven into everything. I didn't have any inkling how much time we'd traverse throughout this novel, but watching the next generation come into their own was an unexpected bonus. We only get her as a primary focus towards the end, but I loved Jaya's fire, like a young Hilo. Across the board, the way the Hilo and Wen's kids "aged up" was fun to watch, and watching the young generation we met at the beginning becoming "old hats" was fulfilling in its own ways.

Worth mentioning: I cried for a single death in this entire series (and there were so many) but when it happened, I full-on sobbed, I was that invested. But other than that, I don't really want to say too much more about the plot itself, the relationships and growing up and deaths and subplots and plot twists, because the journey is one that I want everyone to take fresh and clear-eyed, like I did. Suffice it to say, that *a lot* happens and it's the edge-of-your-seat type stuff mixed with complicated machinations that Lee has shown herself to be a master of. Honestly, Lee’s ability to create such complex growth, with so many moving pieces and all the meandering and complex paths and decisions of the characters, and pull it all back together perfectly for this stunning finish (with nothing getting lost) is so impressive.

Side note: I have been waiting through this entire series to see where Bero’s story finally goes and it delivered, but in a really unexpected way. Like, he was part of a major moment, but not at all the way I (or he) expected, and it easily could have been a kind of letdown. Yet, his subplot gave fascinating insight into the way the rest of the “normal” people in Kekon dealt with the excessive "slow war" and clan based war stuff in a way that was a great narrative balance and perspective.

Thematically, I thought what Lee did as the story got darker, in addressing the harder truths of always dealing in death and violence, the mental health aspects, was an intense (but necessary) piece of this closing book. I also really appreciated that, as the war over jade became more widespread, the fight over control of the market and its approved uses/roles was fought both in military and political spaces, above and below ground, in a frighteningly familiar demonstration of the privatization and monopolization of war (through governments, mercenaries, criminal leaders and more), and the way that civilians are caught in the crossfire so often in modern warfare as a result. Plus, the way this modernization of war brings in so many platforms that were hitherto "out of bounds," like cinema, medicine, athletics, and in the court of public opinion into the game as actual difference makers was also really accurate to real life and added dimension to the breadth of the novel.

I was here for the culmination of feuds closed, but with the twist of future generations being better and moving forwards. The way Lee balanced holding on to traditions that are important and the backbone of culture in a way that is safer and more accepting and truly opens options for a new future, but within the cradle of respect and honor for the past, gives the reader a lot of hope for what's to come in our own future, tbh. And what a gorgeous bringing together of how the depth of ties and support of family are, in the end, what makes a person powerful, as opposed to the more measurable/objective power of money and influence (and can, in fact, lead to the latter, in a stronger way).

In the Acknowledgements at the end, Lee writes that this is the “epic urban fantasy gangster family saga of my heart” and OMG was it ever. It was the epic urban fantasy gangster family saga that my heart didn't even know it wanted/needed and I loved every minute of it. What a f*cking finale - breathtaking - this is how you bring a spectacular series to a spectacular conclusion and I could not recommend it more highly.

“No one is destined to become like their parents. In fact, we can learn from their mistakes and be less likely to repeat them. […] You’re your own person, Niko. You have many people who love you and are proud of you.”

“Why not escape reality, when it was so unbearably cruel to wives and sisters and mothers?”

“…he’d imagined that the foreigners were right - the world of Green Bones was brutal and outdated, nothing like the rest of the world. Now he knew better. There was jade and blood and cruelty everywhere.”

“Clans and jade, murder and vengeance, burdens and feuds and failures passed down from father to brother to son - none of it was a myth…”

Content Warnings

Sweet, Soft, Plenty Rhythm

Laura Warrell

3.0

mysterious reflective sad slow-paced

Plot or Character Driven: Character

Strong character development: Yes

Loveable characters: Complicated

Diverse cast of characters: Yes

Flaws of characters a main focus: Yes

This title/cover combination is one of the most soothing, and thematically inter-supportive. Together they just give vibes of music and physical intimacy that are, in fact, the cornerstones of this novel. Shoutout to Libro.fm for the ALC, which both helped me move through this (very) character-centered work, as well as added to the rhythm and sensuousness of the book, with the gorgeous lilt of the narrator's voice.

Sweet, Soft, Plenty Rhythm centers on Circus Palmer, a jazz trumpet player and ladies man who is holding on to his musical prowess, womanizing, and hopes for a "big break" even as he stares down his mid-forties. When the one woman he seems to always comes back to tells him she's pregnant, it creates a chain of interactions and realizations that are perhaps prescient of Circus' becoming more settled in his upcoming years. As the man Circus is comes into full development through both his own narration and internal consciousness, as well as the perspectives of the women whose lives he weaves in and out of, we learn a bit about each of those lives in turn, with special focus on his first daughter, Koko, who is coming into her own both as a woman and in her sexuality.

This book was definitely written as one of those that is supposed to slowly seep into your bones. It is very much not a plot-driven novel, but rather an exploration of concepts, of love and longing and jazz and the attendant culture. And while there is a kind of quiet power to the representation of different kinds of each that are detailed, I felt more lulled than compelled by the voices and the rhythm, so that while I appreciated the novel, I do not think there is much of it that will stick with me as long as I'd normally expect such a tightly character-biased telling to endure. That being said, the writing was very good. It meandered and the novel was perhaps a bit too long overall, but it was lovely writing. The audiobook was a great option for moving through in a way that allowed me to appreciate the word without getting bogged/stalled by the length versus lack of "action." The way these sort of vignette-style chapters were all brought together in the end, whether actually or just in impact, was nicely handled. One really legitimate literary device highlight for me was the communicating back and forth between two women sleeping with the same man through the marks they leave on his body: incredible and unique. And the ending...it left me with that “deep sigh of contentment” and “the promise of fresh beginnings” kind of feeling, in a way that fit the story and storytelling exactly right.

There were some reasonably compelling characters. I do always love an unlikable and frustrating, but complexly nuanced, character sketch...and Circus was all that. Koko too was a great multi-faceted coming of age character, with all the obsessions and nerves and foibles of youth, but the sweetness and naivete and yearning for recognition, that together make you want to roll your eyes *and* tug on your heartstrings...if that isn't perfectly encapsulated adolescence, I don't know what is. And as one of the central relationships of the novel, once it builds to a point that we are ready for it, as readers, Circus and Koko really shine in the spotlight.

The themes of this novel are, for me, the real strength. Warrell's ability to portray the myriad ways that unavailable and unrequited love are lived and experienced, and how different people handle them, is profound. Circus is the prime example, though not the only one, of someone "never able to settle," who flits and flirts and sleeps around, and has that irresistible magnetism that pulls people in even if they can’t ever provide what the other person needs. Perhaps that is not their fault, especially if they are up front about not being able to fulfill fantasies of settled life and long term relationships. And yet, should not the burden of the empty spaces those people leave behind fall to them at least in part? Because there is no way to flit and flirt through so many people's lives without understanding and acknowledging the pain and loss they have the potential to leave in their wake. Where should that line of fault, of responsibility, be drawn? There is also a dive into the needs of some to have that strife and (emotional) distance and impatience and tension in a relationship, when love can only be felt through/within spaces of desperation and generosity creates a sense of entrapment. There are so many ways that a person can be unavailable, so many ways space can be either necessary or a breaking point, so many ways the people take advantage of each other and pretend not to notice.

This is a novel of the empty spaces and filled spaces of affairs. It was threaded through with a deep seated heaviness, the way that one feels when reality becomes a weight that is borderline too much to bear. Warrell speaks to "the strange comfort that came with relentless disappointment,” because the unknown is so terrifying that even the crushing reality of emotions/interactions unrequited is at least safe is its recognizability. If you want a *vibes* style read, this one has got you covered.

but the way Circus ends unfulfilled/lonely and as a failure, after leaving so many other unfulfilled in his wake, doesn’t feel like enough to make up for what he left in his wake throughout his life - and yet he never lied about who he was/how he’d act ;

“He needed a home, so I made it. That's what you do when you're in love. No one likes to admit it, but that's what we do. Clear the ground so the person we want plants himself there, so we always have whatever it is we love about him. So it stays with us.”

“Why jazz? [...] It’s new every time [...] You got the notes and arrangements, yeah, but once you start playing, something different happens. You don't know what's gonna come. That's what it is about jazz. Everything else about living stops surprising you at some point, right?”

“Why would loving me be so bad? what does love take from you?”

“She wished she was a different kind of woman then, the kind of woman who could relax like he wanted her to, the kind of woman who didn't need so much, the kind of woman love didn’t make smaller.”

“The horn has been the only thing that doesn't change. The notes are always right where I expect them to be. The things I say to my trumpet, I can't say to anyone else, and it's always said things I can't say. I become part of it, you know, put my breath right into it. That's my soul. Maybe I needed a safe place to put that breath. And I tell you, I haven't found a safer place than the inside of a horn.”

“Why don’t grown-ups like being happy?”

“…you never think yourself responsible for the feelings you stir in people.”

Content Warnings

All My Rage

Sabaa Tahir

5.0

challenging emotional reflective tense medium-paced

Plot or Character Driven: A mix

Strong character development: Yes

Loveable characters: Complicated

Diverse cast of characters: Yes

Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

This is two years in a row that I happened to start reading the National Book Award winner for Young people's Literature the same week it was announced. Last year, it was Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Melinda Lo and this year's is All My Rage by Sabaa Tahir. Two years of happy coincidences in a row. And two years of wonderful young adult literature in a row as well.

Salahudin and Noor have been best friends since they met in kindergarten, both quiet and unsure, finding refuge in each other that made them inseparable for years. That is, until The Fight. They haven't spoken in the months since then and both are struggling without the other. Salahudin's mother, Misbah, is dying and he's scrambling to run the family hotel, care for his mother and prop up his father, who's fighting his own battle with addiction. Noor, having lost both her best friend and the maternal connection with Misbah, is struggling alone to survive life with her angry uncle, working in his liquor store and secretly applying to colleges to get herself out of their small town forever. When Salahudin's questionable choices, made to try and save the hotel, rocket out of control and the fallout pulls Noor in against her knowledge/wishes, the budding re-growth of their love for each other is shattered again. But this time, the consequences may be too much for their relationship to survive, and they must fight individually to defeat the monster of their past and present.

Tahir wrote this novel in three voices, Salahudin (Sal), Noor, and Misbah. The first two alternate in the present tense, while Misbah's narration gives us background about her arranged marriage to Sal's father, Toufiq, and the events that led to them leaving Pakistan to "restart" together in California. I listened to the audiobook for this, thanks to Libro.fm for the ALC, and loved all three narrative voices in the recording. As the story unfolded, I honestly felt like the dual perspectives of Sal and Noor were complex and developed enough to stand alone. While I had nothing against Misbah's sections, they were interesting and added nice context since she had unique relationships with both Sal and Noor, I wasn't sure that they were fully necessary or that they added enough to need to be included. Regardless, I was overall deeply impressed by the writing. This is my first experience reading Tahir, but I am sure it will not be my last (her series An Ember in the Ashes has been on my TBR for awhile, and this definitely makes me want to get to it sooner rather than later). She writes with an incredible deftness and authenticity about real emotions. It’s literarily evocative and simultaneously so…everyday...as feelings and reactions go. There is unrequited love, grief over losing a family member, guilt and love and gratitude, and the way that, combined, they overwhelm and confuse everything is just so universal and gorgeously expressed. Specifically, in consideration of the title, Tahir writes the intricacies of rage, an emotion of more nuance than it gets credit for (the anger, fear, grief, uncertainty, and helplessness that make it up), with exceptional skill; really a highlight of the novel for me.

Looking past the writing to the plot and themes, this novel covered a lot of hot topics. I spent basically the entire time I was listening tense AF. It was scene after scene, interaction after interaction, of feeling right on the precipice of rage and grief overflowing into disaster, like major disaster too hard to recover from. The ebb and flow of coming right up to the edge and pulling back over and over, waiting for the inevitable fall (or falls, really, which absolutely did eventually come), was exhausting. And maybe some of the details were unnecessary, or perhaps they didn't all need to go to the extremes that they did (so we could have gotten a bit more focused in on a few more central ones). But for the most part, the role each topic played, or character they brought in, was connected back in more than one instance or with more than one thread, which did, on the whole, make the story stronger. As a heads up to potential readers, these themes include addiction, references to sexual assault, physical abuse, racism/racial slurs, religious bigotry, bullying, substance misuse/abuse, and some tense interactions with police and the justice system. I don't want to give too many specific details of how each plays into the greater plot, because the intensity and not-knowing was a large part of what made this such an impactful read. So, suffice it to say that you should be mentally prepared before reading this, but that it's a very worthwhile experience.

Just a few additional closing thoughts. Tahir speaks a few times to the concept of “people always see the wrong things” and “people see what they want to” concepts in a way that so perfectly encapsulates it...which I know because reading about it was enraging. In exactly the way it needs to be to get the point across. There is a lovely weaving of music into the story, as reference and meaning and escape and release, and with literarily "bringing it back around" symbolism that ties it all back in so smoothly. Salahudin and Noor's interplay felt incredibly genuine, in the healthy and unhealthy ways, the support and the anger and the confusion of emotions, all of it. They were tangible. I was very invested in them both separately and together, and my heart went to them so many times, for so many reasons. And last, maybe I am cynical, but that ending seemed too..."everything works out" for the circumstances. Like, prices were paid, absolutely, but I don't have the kind of faith in the consideration of the US social justice system that was on display here. On the other hand, this was a beautiful example of the unconditional support faith communities can provide.

This book packs a heavy dose of reality, but also a very fulfilling look at the strength you can draw from meaningful relationships. I was blown away by the emotions I experienced while reading - I've really never identified with a titulat emotion as much as I did here. And while I was at times overwhelmed, I also truly appreciate writing that can make me feel that much, be that invested. Wow.

“A part of me is broken [...] Saying I'm not erases the fact that someone did something horrible to me. It erases that I've survived. Because yeah, maybe I'm broken, but I'm strong too. [...] I'm just saying, [...] that there are some things we shouldn't forget, because if we do, then bad people get away with bad shit. And we keep getting hurt.”

“Becuase you're right. The body remembers. [...] But the body heals, too, Salahudin. Promise me you'll give yours that chance.”

“A mother carries her child's innocence in her memory. No matter who they become. We carry our hopes and dreams for them and such things are woven into our souls as God is woven into the fibers of this earth.”

Content Warnings

The Black Tides of Heaven

Neon Yang

3.0

adventurous medium-paced

Plot or Character Driven: A mix

Strong character development: Complicated

Loveable characters: Complicated

Diverse cast of characters: Yes

Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

This is the most recent iteration of the "read out loud together before bed" tradition that my partner and I began a few years ago and have been surprisingly consistent with. This is the first time we have read something totally new to us both that also doesn't have another related fandom/media with it. So kind of a new experience. We chose it like this: I listed the "owned" fantasy/scifi I haven't read yet and he picked the one that sounded the best to him. I have the four-novellas-in-one publication of the series, so we'll be reading all of them. But since I haven't read these yet before, I wanted to do my normal review-per-book situation.

Akeha and Mokoya are twins, born to The Protector, the mother who rules the Protectorate with a heavy hand, and traded to the Grand Monastery to pay back a favor. As they grow, Mokoya realizes she has the gift of prophecy, while Akeha pulls into the background, watching the pieces of their world move around them. The twins choose different paths moving into adulthood, they reach, from their individual perspectives, the same conclusions about the poison that is their mother's reign. Mokoya from within and Akeha from the outskirts, they each support the rebel Machinist movement, while simultaneously trying to maintain their close connection to the other.

This got off to a very intriguing start. I always appreciate when a new magic system and world can be introduced in a way that is not too much explanation/exposition (dropped right in), yet still has enough paced unfolding that you don’t feel completely lost/overwhelmed. The relationship between Mokoya and Akeha was really well developed, considering the length. There was a lot of nuance to the way they grew so intertwined and yet so separate (in everything from their personalities to their genders to the role(s) they play in the larger world). I felt like the rest of the characters were fairly flat, the affairs of the world very background, while Moko and Keha did hold the central role through all their years and growth and separation and individual/parental trauma and rebellion. Although they ended very much back where it started, a potential commentary on the cyclical patterns of life (though perhaps not clear enough to be fully successful), I wonder if the next books will cover their "second chance" to choose their paths forwards and if different choices will be made or the same circular paths followed.

A side note on gender/sexuality, I did love the use of neutral pronouns until a person is old enough (as defined by themselves) to choose gender for themselves, but a little disappointed when it was mostly presented as a binary choice (unless I missed something...but I can’t find any indication remaining outside the binary in some way was an option.) Related, I liked the "complication" of the twins choosing different gender paths but having feelings for the same person (who clearly feels connected to them both in return, though it's never specified how exactly). It introduced a lot of wonderful nebulous sexuality complexity and representation.

I was otherwise super invested as the story unfolded, as I am used to these short novellas having a real "punch" in the end (like Binti and The Empress of Salt and Fortune), but this one didn't deliver in quite the same way. I mean, there was a nuclear turn, and a tragic death, but in both cases, I wasn't really fully sold by the plot point or, for whatever reason, not invested enough the care the way I think I was supposed to. Plus, the ending felt a bit hanging, like, unfinished. I can get behind a well done open-ended ending, but this one felt less complete, more unfulfilling, as opposed to purposefully open to interpretation. I'm here to give the series the benefit of the doubt, because the world and magic systems feel well fleshed out, and there's still a promise for the greater story. But I think in part that's because I have the rest of the series already at hand - if I didn't already have it, or if I was waiting for the rest to be published, I don't think I'd be invested enough to continue.

I do have to say, to end on a big positive note, that the writing was really special. The short descriptions and turns of phrase are lyrical and gorgeously evocative, and really smart in vocabulary. I pulled a couple examples, but honestly the whole thing really brought you along with its flow. Here are some highlights though: “…an ocean of missed opportunities and wasted futures roiling between them.” and “…their lips issuing a commandment of desire, playing a symphony of desperation.” and “So great was the appetite of empire that it would not even spit out the bones.” I mean, what poeticism.

Overall, not as stunning as I had hoped. Though the language and world-building and magic, as well as the twins primary relationship with each other, met expectations, I was left wanting something more from the story itself. Here's to hoping the next novellas add enough plot and depth to redeem this opening.

“In the monastery, [...] they taught us that fortune is both intractable and impartial. That when bad things happen, it's the result of an incomprehensible and inhuman universe working as it does. The mountain shrugs, but thinks nothing of the houses crushed in the avalanche. That was not it’s purpose.”

“Legends form around grains of truth.”

"The saying goes, 'The black tides of heaven direct the courses of human lives.' To which a wise teacher said, 'But as with all waters, one can swim against the tide.'"

“Because he had always known, even as a child, that he was the lightning, while she was the fire in the core of planets. And the world needed both. Revolutions needed both. Someone had to wield the knives, but someone also had to write the treaties.”

“With all the horrors in the world, it was easy to forget there were wonders too.”

Content Warnings

Shutter

Ramona Emerson

3.0

dark mysterious reflective medium-paced

Plot or Character Driven: A mix

Strong character development: Complicated

Loveable characters: Complicated

Diverse cast of characters: Yes

Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

I don't usually read thrillers, a trend that is probably pretty obvious if you even cursorily follow my reviews, but I was intrigued by this one that made the National Book Award longlist. It's not really that common, at least in my recreational following of the award, for a book categorized as a "thriller" to make the list. (Side note: shout out to libro.fm for the advanced listerner's copy!) And so, here we are.

Rita Todacheene works for the Albuquerque Police Department as a forensic photographer. She's loved cameras and taking photos since she was a child, and this was one of the only options she could find that provided her a stable income and the chance to take photos. It is, perhaps, just inconvenient (or is it more like fate) that she is also secretly able to see ghosts. In her job, they sometimes point her to clues that others have overlooked. In her personal life, it caused quite a bit of strife, as her superstitious Navajo reservation community treated her differently, isolated (with the exception of her grandmother, who raised her), once they found out about her taboo ability. Rita has figured out a way to, for the most part, shut out the ghosts, but the victim of a recent case she photographed just will not leave her alone...and the ghost's push for vengeance will lead Rita into a dangerous cartel inside-man/cover-up situation.

Well, I can see what made this particular thriller special, a literary sort of mystery, that could get it added to the NBA longlist. The writing is...incredibly evocative. I literally made the note "shit, this opening descriptive monologue is visceral" after the first couple pages. And then it never let up. It's intense, I can't lie. The specifics and particulars of the crime scenes Rita photographs are not for the faint-hearted. Seriously, it's an onslaught of gruesome murder scenes and details. Please be ready: all the content warnings for death and violent death and blood and disfigurement, etc. But the use of the photographs and the perspective of the photographer as a narrative device works really well. It adds so much to the tangibility of the narrative. This is just writing that sticks to your bones. And I enjoyed the way the ending took “making peace with death” to a whole new/different level.

Rita's personal development throughout the novel was kept me interested. The story is told in dual storylines. One of the past, as Rita grows up and realizes both that she has the "gift" of seeing ghosts, as well as the turbulent home life that she was thrust into off the reservation as a result of the visions of ghosts and communication with the dead that people’s superstitions made it too hard to live alongside. One in the present, as Rita struggles to help her victim's ghost get answers, and revenge, while trying to balance her own relationships and jobs and normal life stressors. It took me longer to get into the “past” storyline, but about halfway through it got more compelling for me, and the way it built from there, alongside their mystery in the present, balanced well. I loved Rita's relationship with her grandmother, it was an overall highlight, for me, as it was nuanced and genuine in both its flaws and its fullness. Tied in with that, the thread of Navajo culture/traditions/beliefs and contemporary history interspersed lightly, but thoroughly, throughout was phenomenal. It was beautifully tender and esteemed, while Emerson showed great insight into the complexities of the advantages and disadvantages of being raised solely on the reservation versus in combination with off-reservation life (both the involuntary, like the residential schools, and the self-determined).

Interestingly, I feel like the literary side of this novel overshadowed the mystery/thriller aspects a little too much. Like, I felt a weirdly low amount of tension while reading, considering the intensity and high-stakes of the plot and the life-threatening situations Rita finds herself in. Also, there was some plot stuff that either didn't feel right or wasn't my cup of tea. First, and this is my thing with thrillers, something always happens that feels too convenient or easy (in this case, the party photos) and, really, information she gets from a “retired” detective seemed like it came too easy (like, is he not afraid of backlash or whatever?!). Also, unrelated to most of the rest of the plot, she had a one-night stand with a guy who then never came back...and he was supposed to? It felt like both an unnecessary plot point that then turned into a loose/hanging thread by the end and I felt we could have done without that half-hearted attempt to highlight that Rita "also has a personal life/life outside work." Her friends felt similarly "iffy" as far as their development and role(s) in the greater plot - more convenient that worth being developed in their own right.

Overall, I just don't know about this one. I realize that I might be biased because it's not my typical genre. And there were parts that were great - the writing was a real highlight and the cultural aspects were phenomenal. I also thought the concept was so cool, the idea of ghosts helping a forensic photographer find evidence to capture is wonderful in theory and vision. But the plot and development left something to be desired. And the combination of literary fiction and thriller wasn't enough of either/both together. So, in the end, this maybe was just...not enough...for me.

Content Warnings

Bird Uncaged: An Abolitionist's Freedom Song

Marlon Peterson

4.0

challenging dark hopeful informative reflective medium-paced

I know for sure that the one and only place I've seen this book is on @thestackspod IG feed. That put it on my radar, but it wasn't until I was shelving books a few weeks ago at the library and it caught my eye on the shelf that I spur-of-the-moment decided to go ahead and check it out. And here we are, after I read it in two sittings, because it was just that compelling.

In this short memoir, Marlon Peterson takes the reader through his experiences growing up the son of a Trinidadian mother and a deeply faithful Jehovah's Witness father in 1980s NYC. From the daily violence of the school and neighborhoods to his very intimate and personal experience being sexually assaulted and raped as a young teen, he gives the reader an unflinching look at the many ways his years growing up shaped him to make the decision to participate in an armed robbery that resulted in two murders. At the age of nineteen, he was convicted, and spent his next ten years in prison. While incarcerated, Peterson became absorbed with social justice activism, education, and abolitionist efforts that would define not only those years of his life, but the direction of his work and life after prison as well. In these pages, Peterson unflinchingly lays out not only his choices and their consequences, but also the variety of cages, both self-inflicted and externally applied, that exist within the reality of American society. And he lays out with deep emotion his reasons, with many credits to the original authors of these ideas alongside his own interpretations and philosophies, why incarceration is neither rehabilitation nor justice.

Oh my goodness. Peterson's narrative voice is visceral and piercing. Starting as early as the dedication page, it just stops you right in your tracks. It is at times repetitive, or a bit choppy and jumps around, but the conversational stream of consciousness and the emotional intensity of his words is a highlight and, once you're adjusted to his style, you cannot help but be deeply affected. Some other literary high points include letters (some to his younger self, one to his rapist, one to "freedom") and quotes that open each chapter, which are in turns tender and heartbreaking and, at all times, incredibly expressive. It is so clear the role that they have had in his personal journey of healing. The inclusion of his own words, poetry and journaling, are exquisite. In particular, the poem he wrote inspired by Maya Angelou’s I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings is stunning, extraordinarily illustrative, a true resistance in words (one of the only forms within his control during his incarceration).

Thematically, of course, this is a very potent and passionate reading experience, with a number of moments and topics that could be potentially triggering to readers, so please be aware of that going in. However, if you are in a place to be able to handle it, it is well worth it. Peterson writes with a very accessible philosophical voice and I want to list out a few of the points he makes (or at the very least, explores) that I was particularly struck by. I'm going to just bullet point my thoughts here, as I jotted down so many reactions while reading through this (honestly quite short) memoir that I'm afraid I don't have the capacity or capability to make them all into a flowing paragraph of any worth. So, here they are:

- Peterson takes numerous predatory “normal/everyday” moments and interrogates why they are normal and everyday, despite their inherent and consistent harm and toxicity (things like violence against women, fighting, gun violence, gang activity, etc.) It's a searing condemnation of the need to take your own pain out on someone else, the longing for belonging and community and safety, and (unavoidably a primary cause) the patriarchy and white supremacy.

- The concept of disconnecting from feelings in the face of so much daily fear/trauma/unhealthy external expectations (the face you show the world versus the pain you mask), in order to maintain sanity, both prior to incarceration and then reiterated even more strongly as a survival tactic in prison, is terrifying. And explains quite a bit about why/how people make the choices they do.

- Prison as a crime against the people within. It preys on the mind in a way that, as mental wellness/illness cannot be seen, it also cannot be quantified, and therefore the system can never be held accountable for its crimes, cannot have justice searched for against it. And this applies to all those within the system, both people who are incarcerated by it *and* those who are employed by it.

- So much gorgeous focus on the saving power of imagination, as a coping mechanism, as escapism, as a breeding ground for hope.

- The removal of Pell Grants for people in prison is infuriating. Retribution and punishment do nothing to help with “rehabilitation,” plus this further reduces the chance for people to make different choices or work towards a future of greater opportunity, of redemption and contribution and purpose. “Incarceration doesn’t rehabilitate; people do.”

- Peterson really asks and explores, profoundly, the concept of being defined by one’s worst moment. He comments on, once incarcerated for that worst moment, it is extrapolated onto every decision made and every potential action taken, always with the worst assumptions at the forefront. And he includes how that affects a person's internal and self-views as well, and how that encourages growth and “rehabilitation” (spoiler: it does not).

- Even after prison, there are myriad mental cages, the feelings of being trapped, stuck in only negative self talk and self awareness, because how does one balance being both a perpetrator and a victim?

- Addressing the specific issues of toxic masculinity and patriarchy, as it complicates all these things even more for Black women, was an important acknowledgement. Along these same intersectional lines, I would also have liked at least a nod towards trans populations in prisons.

- Related to the above point about trans populations, there are a few other intersectionality misses (specifically Peterson questioning if concentration camps could ever rear their heads again), that I felt like did dismiss/ignore the experiences of many peoples who have, or currently are, experiencing realities just like that. However, I will say that, despite that, he does acknowledge his own learning journey, and how it continues and his understandings/beliefs evolve with time, so there is space allowed for continuing the journey, which is key.

The final chapter of this memoir was full-on *feels.* It came hard and fast and was exactly the perfect fierce, furious finish this book deserved. Peterson unshakably calls out America for its falsities and dual realities, while offering what growth into real Justice could look like, if we were just willing to acknowledge the hypocrisy and try to create something new, more inclusive and universally beneficial, in its place. He advocates that we all deserve that kind of freedom, one with no cages, no “prison identities,” whether they be ones we create or those created for us, and calls for us to commit to the education and activism to get us there.

Y'all I spent more time highlighting and transcribing passages while reading this than any book I've read before. This was, as I said, incredibly accessible in its philosophical explorations and narrative voice, and Peterson's personality comes across so strongly through all his words. So, that being said I have a lot of pull-quotes below. Take a peek. And then go read it yourself!

“I wish someone told me that simply moving on was not freedom from the harm felt and seen.”

“Who taught us that there was no sense behind our responses to being treated senseless and empathetically? Survival of the oppressed isn't always logical to the oppressor when observing the oppressed. None of our people are monsters - none. The moment we describe people as monsters we shift human behavior into the realm of the unexplainable. Every act of violence can be explained…”

“Racism is always working, ain’t it; even when you don’t have the data and language to articulate it.”

“By puberty I was committed to notions of manhood that were determined by how much pain I could keep to myself.”

“I had no purpose, and while that's normal to most teens, a purposeless existence in the midst of serious traumas and real concerns about safety can be a poisonous concoction.”

“I was committed to my own demise in the pursuit of safety…”

“Feeling unnecessary is a terrible thing.”

"In life you get to choose your choices, but you don't get to choose your consequences."

“Jail is a miserable place filled with people living through miserable situations, miserable guilt, miserable abuse, and miserable shame. It was hard not to want bad things to happen to people as irrelevant as you.”

** “America harms and sells the lie of the American dream to everyone, including those of us not incorporated in the framing of this nation - women, people who are Black, Brown. America's inability and unwillingness to acknowledge its first lie - the American dream - prevents it from creating a new nation, a new document that is inclusive of the humanity of everyone.”

“You have to be fully aware of your capabilities - good and bad - to understand your power to create a better self-image.”

“But most people like to believe the illusion that prison is the intervention that stops crime. But no, it's getting older, having a sense of usefulness, believing in something you want to live for.”

“We were a medley of people who were usually insecure and rarely certain. We were a community of healers, warriors, jesters, and teachers. We were people broken by experiences, surviving the best way we knew how. We were you.”

“Though some of the world's greatest thinkers, healers, and leaders have spent time in prison, in real time incarcerated people aren't allowed the grace of possibility and purpose.”

“Broken people break people, even those whom they love…”

“Prison is never experienced in a vacuum. Never.”

“Everything about prison and jail is designed to compel worthlessness. […] Feeling good about yourself when you are walking with daily depressions is a revolutionary act in a cage designed to deplete. The shame of the act committed, the guilt of the conviction, the anger of the daily humiliation, the hurt of being abandoned by loved ones, the hurt of abandoning - all of it was so heavy.”

“Prison are flippant with people's humanity, aren't they? They treat people like an illness or a disease. So you get why feeling good about yourself in prison is labor.”

“Whenever you place people together you create possibilities of growth.”

*** “Abolition is a politics of creationism. Wanting to end policing is wanting to create thriving communities that do not need an armed state security force that has no true legislative and judicial accountability. A world without prisons is a root-reckoning of the community problems that preface the prison problems… [...] Abolition is wanting to live without fear. Have police succeeded in establishing societies of safety? Has parole? Probation?Deportation? No. No. No. No. And, no.”

“America’s refusal to listen to what Black people ask, plead, strategize, and demand is the core of the American sickness. Justice is undoing all that is needed to acquire redemption from brokenness.”

*** “But, America believes in armaments more than it believes in its lies of white racial superiority, more than the possibilities of the people here, more than it believes in life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And in my experience, people cling to weapons when they are scared. I don't know if I live in a terrified nation, but I know that this nation is terrified of people who look like me, which makes people like me terrified of this nation. All of this fear suffocates space for love. Love for others makes you want to undo behaviors that hurt.”

“Prison offers no rewards for being selfless and contributing to humanity and community. Prisons leech time and dignity.”

“Prisons can do this thing where [...] Living with the memory that you were the purveyor of some great harm toward another person or people can have the unintended effect of blinding you to the injustice of being treated unfairly. Critiquing a system for injury can feel sacrilegious and incongruent with accepting guilt for your personal transgressions.”

“America the blighted that loves the brutal bravery of its beginning more than its ideals of justice for all.”

Content Warnings

Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism

Amanda Montell

5.0

informative reflective medium-paced

I've had Montell's nonfiction, both this one and Wordslut, on my TBR for a bit now. If I remember correctly, she originally came across my radar with Cultish through @thestackspod. In any case, I was immediately interested, but apparently I am not the only one. The waitlist at my library for the audiobook was...long. But I finally got it! And then I listened to it in less than two days because oh my goodness I could not put this down.

Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism is titled to perfection, as the book talks about exactly that - the way that language is the linchpin in all cult and cult-like situations, from Jonestown to social media gurus, from Scientology to CrossFit to multi-level marketing companies. Moving from an overall examination of why we are, as the human race, so fascinated by and drawn into stories of cults to a survey of the various types/levels of cults and cultish language, with personal interviews and stories to add depth and interest, Montell really gives an insightful introduction and overview in this book.

So yea, this book was absolutely mesmerizing. I was completely caught up in Montell's narration and the picture she was painting of the world and words of cults. She sets the stage by talking the reader through the various definitions of cults, the different levels of extremity of a group of like minded/similar believers, and consequences for when one strays. She gives introductory examples from all over the spectrum, like doomsday groups, boutique fitness, pyramid schemes, AA, religious groups, fraternities, “stans,” militant vegans, social movements - the majority of which are essentially harmless (and at times even helpful) - but points out that they all share certain similarities of language, and promises to further detail each throughout the rest of the book. During this primer, I actually really enjoyed the discussion of common understandings, like cult members being brainwashed and cult leaders preying on the most "vulnerable" types of people, and how Montell basically disproved all those mainstream beliefs. She presented a breadth (if not an extreme depth, as she covered quite a bit and this book isn't that long) of research and information to correct these false conceptions.

There were so many "oh!" and "whoa" moments while reading this and I want to have them all here for posterity, but putting them into organized paragraphs seems like...a lot of work. Haha. So please enjoy this bulleted list of the most fascinating things I learned/read. And consider this like a highlights list of what Montell captures in these pages and then go pick it up for yourself to get more details about and connections among it all.

- There is a confirmation bias of cults as bad, because the bad ones get news coverage, so we know more about them, and the cycle continues.

- What is a "cult" versus what is a "religion" is based mostly on support/acceptance from the establishment (socially and legally).

- The language of cults allows for othering and demonization of non-followers. Developing that “us vs them” dichotomy is key in creating isolation from the outside world, which is part of how people get pulled so deeply in and then are not sure how to get back out (well, that and the other language and the potential heavily harming consequences for leaving).

- Other language maneuvers to create that complete buy-in include the importance of renaming members and the confluence of mysticism and scientific vocabulary.

- Instead of preying on the most emotionally vulnerable ( those “damaged” or needing saving), cults often get their most fanatic followers from the most idealistic, because of the vulnerability of big dreams and what utopias the cults promise (which totally makes sense as to why they're such intense followers and don’t fall apart mentally).

- Really interesting discussions of using confirmation bias and gaslighting by cult leaders to manipulate followers towards self-distrust (and thus further dependence).

- Connections drawn among cultish language use from Great Reformation and evangelical preaching/church to the American Dream/capitalism/toxic positivity and productivity and Protestant work ethic (as universal definition of professionalism)... all in all the "prosperity theology" was captivating. So many different concepts all tied together over time to get us to where we are now!

- Actual science behind gullibility and systems of thinking and impulsivity and levels of need and even what mood a person is in as contributing (or mitigating) factors for potential cult involvement.

- This intellectual and academic look at boutique fitness, like SoulCycle and CrossFit, is fascinating to read with lived experience of my own. It was sometimes hard not to get defensive (but I worked through it, cause I have my own issues with it and, as someone more personally enmeshed, it would make sense that my feelings have more nuance), and so many true/good points were made! I'd also have loved Montell's take on the crossover of boutique fitness replacing religion for millennials and the extremely religious CrossFit communities - it's a subsect (a cult within a cult, if you will) that I feel would make a fascinating study.

- Exploring the ways the connectivity of the internet and social media has created space and opportunity for like minded people to find each other, for good (those living isolated, for whatever reason, and needing a community for mental health/safety/protection) and bad (the small numbers of violent dissenters and/or remote guru-types with negative health influence). On this note, Montell's explanation of the ever more single-circle-Venn-diagram situation of Qanon and extreme leftists (government and medical distrust) as the most recent iteration of a centuries long slew of doomsday cults was fascinating.

As the finale, Montell sums up the "explosion" of smaller cult-like groups and options in recent years by drawing a line from the unique "developed but few-safety-nets" reality of American life and the withdrawal of millennials from religious and civic-minded community groups to the pull towards the connection/community of cults/cultish groups. There was so much about the discussion - the idea of taking pieces of different things to meet your needs - that resonated with me. And I can truly empathize (though I do think I am too naturally skeptical, or confrontational, to be drawn in to an extreme). But I did feel better about the distinctions made about cult versus cult-like, in regards to who is given power/empowerment (the leader/guru or the individual) and the "are you free to make different decisions/ask questions/leave?" aspect, in knowing that I can buy into something for my own benefit but not let it take me too far. Honestly, I wish this had been twice as long, three times as long. I don’t remember the last time I was this absorbed and I recommend this *so* highly. Enthralling.

"What techniques do charismatic leaders use to exploit people’s fundamental needs for community and meaning? How do they cultivate that kind of power?"

"Language is a leader’s charisma. It’s what empowers them to create a mini universe—a system of values and truths—and then compel their followers to heed its rules."

"Whether wicked or well-intentioned, language is a way to get members of a community on the same ideological page."

"Hassan says that groups toward the destructive end use three kinds of deception: omission of what you need to know, distortion to make whatever they’re saying more acceptable, and outright lies."

"Ultimately, the needs for identity, purpose, and belonging have existed for a very long time, and cultish groups have always sprung up during cultural limbos when these needs have gone sorely unmet."

"That’s because language doesn’t work to manipulate people into believing things they don’t want to believe; instead, it gives them license to believe ideas they’re already open to. Language—both literal and figurative, well-intentioned and ill-intentioned, politically correct and politically incorrect—reshapes a person’s reality only if they are in an ideological place where that reshaping is welcome."

"The majority leave before things get deadly, but the reasons some don’t might also sound familiar. They’re the same reasons you might put off a necessary breakup: denial, listlessness, social stresses, fear they might seek revenge, lack of money, lack of outside support, doubt that you’ll be able to find something better, and the sheer hope that your current situation will improve—go back to how it was at the start—if only you hold on a few more months, commit a fraction more."

"When you’re experimenting with faith and belief, there has to be room to ask questions, express your misgivings, and seek outside information, both early on and deep into your membership. “The most important thing to remember is that if something is legitimate, it will stand up to scrutiny,” Steven Hassan told me."

"Combine this withdrawal from mainstream medicine with young people’s disillusionment with traditional faith, and cult fitness exploded to fill these corporeal and spiritual voids."

"Exercisers driven only by numbers tend to quit within twelve months. It’s when elements of belonging, self-worth, and empowerment enter the picture that members are moved to renew their fitness memberships year after year. Language is the glue that binds that “addictive” combo of community and motivation."

"In lieu of a physical place to meet, cultish jargon gives followers something to assemble around."

"The internet scammeth, and the internet fact-checketh away."

"It’s not that smart people aren’t capable of believing in cultish things; instead, says Shermer, it’s that smart people are better at “defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons.”"

"...martyrdom. Events like this serve as proof that overlooking the nuances of cultish communities only perpetuates a culture of hyperbole and chaos."

"It’s in our DNA to want to believe in something, to feel something, alongside other people seeking the same. I’m confident there’s a healthy way to do that. Part of me thinks it’s actually by becoming a part of several “cults” at once—like our Jonestown survivor Laura Johnston Kohl exchanging her one-commune lifestyle for involvement in a medley of separate groups. That way, we’re free to chant, to hashtag, to talk of manifesting and blessings, to use glossolalia even . . . to speak some form of Cultish . . . all the while staying tethered to reality."

Content Warnings

The Memory Librarian: And Other Stories of Dirty Computer

Janelle Monáe

4.0

adventurous challenging emotional hopeful mysterious reflective tense slow-paced

Plot or Character Driven: A mix

Strong character development: Yes

Loveable characters: Complicated

Diverse cast of characters: Yes

Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

This is a super eye-catching cover, with the bright white and gold, and a title that really makes any book nerd really want to see more of what it's about. I had read a few reviews that said this was, at some points, a bit hard to follow (for various reasons), so I waited until I was able to get both a physical and an audiobook copy from my library. And to whoever's reviews said that (I think @shriekingstack was one of them), I'd like to say thank you, because that was absolutely the right call for me.

The Memory Librarian: And Other Stories of Dirty Computer is a collection of short stories all set in the Afrofuturistic world created by the absolute icon, Janelle Monáe, written in collaboration with a number of well-known and respected writers (Alaya Dawn Johnson, Danny Lore, Eve L. Ewing, Yohanca Delgado, and Sheree Renée Thomas). This sci-fi reality is based in a future where thoughts and memories are gathered, monitored, and edited as a means of control and it explores what life is like under that kind of invasive and totalitarian technological rule, and what people must do in order to live outside it or attempt to overthrow it. Each story represents a different perspective on this, with a focus on the artistic and "counterculture" communities who fight to maintain their creativity, individualism, right to love and express identity, in the way(s) that feel right to them.

I didn't originally realize that this was a collection of stories with shared setting and themes, as opposed to a full-on novel following the same characters and plot throughout, but once I realized, I organized my thoughts as I always do: with some small notes on each story and ending with a finale of overall reactions. Enjoy.

The Memory Librarian - This first novella sets the vibe and scene perfectly, with themes about the power of memory (maintaining or repressing it) in shaping who we are. It explores the cost of suppressing bad memories, despite it *seeming* easier than having to live with them. And it highlights the individuality and experience we gain, what we are able to learn, from having both the good and the bad within us. It's a cautionary tale as well, about being so afraid of the darkness and memories of loss/grief, that we give up too much of ourselves in favor of forgetting. It also provides a steep learning curve on the history of the world of "dirty computers" and introduces the reader to the reality that they'll exist within, while reading this collection.

Nevermind - This homage to the gathering places that have, historically, provided a safe and welcoming space to anyone on the fringe of "acceptable" society (especially queer populations, but with intersectionality of different races as well) has a very comforting undertone throughout, despite the constant concern over the potential of governmental forces breaking the safety of the community. Thematically, the concept of the "dirty or clean" binary acts as a (not-too-subtle) metaphor for many other false binaries (like gender and more) in a really fascinating way. I really loved the exploration of compassion, how showing it to everyone is a tool of liberation, even when that means it must be shown to those of the opposition as well (because that’s how we separate ourselves from the oppressors). And the way the writers show how fear can steal the compassion from anyone, despite their good intentions, is really affecting. In addition, using storytelling to communicate traumatic memories/experiences was a therapy technique used a lot, and in a really touching way. Overall, this was a great representative story of how exclusionary tactics are wrong on all sides (right wing extremists, TERFS, and all...alike); freedom isn’t truly that until everyone has access to it.

Timebox -There is a fine line of what is good for the greater community and what is good for an individual, and when to put the community first versus knowing when you cannot help others until your own cup has been refilled, and this story explores that with intensity. And in a wonderfully traditional "sci-fi" way. It was tough. But also, I got a little detached from those emotional reactions and reflections becasue the ending...lost me. I mean, the writing was awesome and I was left with a deeply unsettled feeling that something went *super* wrong, but like, I have no idea what it is that happened. Strange.

Save Changes - This one was intense too, full of plot-based tension from beginning to end. The suffocating fear of surveillance is visceral. It explored the concept of being an outcast by association, as a byproduct of totalitarianism and governmental determination of right and wrong (in the vocabulary of this world, clean and dirty), with no room for dissent or disagreement. It also had some psychological themes as well, looking at the different ways children/people react to the same life experiences, sometimes in diametrically opposite ways. I enjoyed the structure and pacing and plot of this one, as a story, but (as usual with time change/travel) I had some logistical questions (ahhhhh, the joys of reading sci-fi).

Timebox Altar(Ed) - What a gorgeous final story full of hope for the future and closure with the ones we love!! Allowing youth to find and experience the agency to do something to make their world that kind of better is a balm for the soul to close out. And again, there was some really cool classic sci-fi plot devices in this one that I felt like were really well-used.

So, I don’t think I realized how much more media there was to this world (like from Monáe's other work, a recent-ish album as a primary example), so I’m adjusting my reactions based on not having exposed myself fully first, as that's on me. Bearing in my that my feeling lost or lack of understanding is, at least in part, a result of that, I do want to mention that I did sometimes feel like I was dropped right in makes it feel like floundering as a reader. I did individually enjoy each story for what it was, as each was well crafted and delivered. In a general sense, this was like reading a technological alternate-reality fever dream that is just enough recognizable to our world (social structures and biases of race and gender and power) that it feels familiar-ish, but then the setting/plots are so foreign and the language is so flourish-y and artistic, that is feels incredibly unrecognizable at the same time. Definitely a unique and very cerebral (literally - dreams and memories, and figuratively - narration and world building) science fiction reading experience. And, as a the major connecting vibe and message, it stands as a profound acknoweldgement and honoring of of Black/Brown queer revolutionaries of the past, present and future.

“Imagine a flood, imagine a wave, imagine an avalanche, imagine a storm. Imagine any disaster you please, but note that it always begins as one before it becomes many. What in singular expressions seems simple, laughable, beneath your notice, becomes, in the plural, the last thing you notice before you die. This is the bleak magic of exponential growth.”

“Humans repress their own memories, of course. They do it all the time. [...] The fact that --- weaponized this effect for its own purposes doesn't mean that people don't forget things for their own simple survival every second of the day.”

"In the hard, old way of forgetting, which is remembering with grief."

“We’re not too much. Never too much. Who we are and what we feel can't be too much. Might feel that way sometimes, but it isn’t true.”

"He understood something about hunger and how it ate at more than the lining in the belly, how it ate at the heart and made it harder to concentrate and dream at night."

“Can’t build nothing if you can't feel nothing. Community comes from feeling and feeling comes hand in hand with creation.”

“You’ve got to dream a future before you can build a future.”

“They can’t just keep taking and taking from us, from everybody, and making it impossible for us to breathe and live in our own skin.”

Content Warnings

Count Your Lucky Stars

Alexandria Bellefleur

4.0

funny hopeful lighthearted fast-paced

Plot or Character Driven: A mix

Strong character development: Complicated

Loveable characters: Yes

Diverse cast of characters: Complicated

Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

I find romances to be fantastic vacation reads, light and fun and easy to jump in and out of as you. So, I was thrilled when my hold on this final book in the "Written in the Stars" romance series came in the week before I was set to travel for a long weekend. I sped through the first half on the flight and finished up the rest over coffee in the mornings before heading out for sight-seeing (and eating and drinking, haha).

The final installation in this series focuses on Margot, Elle's best friend and former roomie who, though very excited for the pairing-off of all her friends (Darcy and Elle, Brendon and Annie), is starting to feel a little bit left out, sort of a fifth wheel. When she shows up to tour a potential venue for Brendon and Annie's wedding, she runs into a very unexpected person: the wedding planner is Olivia Grant, Margot's childhood best friend, longtime crush, first love all rolled into one. Olivia, excited and nervous at this major opportunity in her career, is *just* as surprised to see Margot for the first time in over a decade. They've both lived full lives since then, are coming in with emotional changes, but neither has managed to forget the perfect week they spent together in high school, and those feelings are coming back strong for both as they spend more time together.

As with all the books in this series, when this friend group gets involved, all bets at how supportively nosy they get are off. I honestly love reading about them. I mean, sometimes it walks the line of healthy or not, their emotional codependency, but they're so lovable and cozy and, at the end of the day, so supportive, that I cannot help but feel safe and at home with them. That's probably because I know, despite any disagreements and over-involvement they have, that in the end they will both tell the hard truths and support whatever the other(s) decide...and because it's a romance, it'll end happily.

Other things I loved, in general, included the group text messages with Margot's family. I wish we had gotten to actually meet them, or at least get a little more on page time with their voices, because they were laugh out loud recognizable (thank goodness airplanes are loud, because I am not joking about laughing out loud), with the two brothers and the spot on sarcasm. Also, Bellefleur again crushes the sex writing. The sex scenes are steamy and fantastic. And as a particular highlight of this book, the way she wrote sensuality and sexual tension into the small things, like eating a piece of cake on a fork or the way a shirt lays over a character’s body, is top notch. Finally, and this has gotten better from book to book, in my opinion, I thought the "third act conflict" here was great: realistic and well-handled and not overdramatic. Just a regular fight like anyone would recognize, where things are said that are maybe too aggressive, but not unforgivably hurtful, and both Margot and Olivia are mature enough to want to keep working on it after a little time to cool off/regroup. I so appreciate that, as a contrived situation in this part of the story is really a turn-off for me. Plus, in this case, there was a little tongue-in-cheek disaster humor, the "everything that could go wrong does," that was a bit humorous, since as a reader we already know it will end happily. And on that note, Bellefluer again delivers on the "sparkles and fairy lights and champagne bubbles" style romance vibes that I have come to expect (and love) from her. When you want that, there are few better.

My final note is a small criticism. And to be honest, there is a chance that I was just reading too fast because these romances are the "speed through the pages" type reads for me, so please bear that in mind. But. I found that I struggled to tell Olivia and Margot apart, perspective-wise. Their holding back communication issues about the relationship were basically the same. (However, let me please note that I appreciated that they recognized when they were falling into the insecurity/miscommunication trope. It makes it easier to handle as the reader. I get that it is hard, for real, but the self-awareness is a real balm for me in dealing with this heavily overused way to create tension). Anyways, I’d have liked more separation of development/voice for our two MCs. Even in their dialogue sometimes, I lost the thread of who was speaking. And though their individual stories (jobs, families, life trajectories, etc.) were well developed, their personalities and mannerisms just seemed too similar.

All to say that, I was super pleased with the closure we got for everyone's relationships at the end of this final book. I had fun reading this whole series and this was a spectacular overall ending. This is just really high quality fuzzy and comforting reading material.

“Love isn’t supposed to be quantifiable, relationships held up against one another, pitted against one another. That's a shitty thing to try to do, like asking someone to compare their love for their mother to their love for their partner or their best friend.”

“Reality was different. Talking, sharing, like so many things, was easier said than done. 'Look, normally I am totally team talk about it. But it's so much easier to tell someone to talk than to actually do it. The problem isn't opening my mouth and saying the words - that's the easy part. It's - it's what comes after. When the words are out there, and I can't take them back.'”

Content Warnings

The Language of Thorns: Midnight Tales and Dangerous Magic

Leigh Bardugo

4.0

adventurous dark mysterious medium-paced

Plot or Character Driven: Plot

Strong character development: Complicated

Loveable characters: Complicated

Diverse cast of characters: Yes

Flaws of characters a main focus: No

This was a follow-up read for after my partner and I finished our joint read-out-loud-together-at-night-before-bed journey through the Grishaverse. We started with the Shadow and Bone trilogy, then the Six of Crows duology (both rereads for me), then we got through the King of Scars duology for the first time together (I don't have separate reviews for those - they were solid additions to the world and we really enjoyed reading them together, but I didn't have enough feels to warrant the time spent on full reviews). I'd had this book on my shelves for *years,* but hadn't ever gotten to it. And after finishing all the other books, and being fully immersed in the Grishaverse for so long (we watched the first season of the Netflix series too), we decided to finish it all out with this collection of tales from the world. It was a cool enough reading experience that I am going to go ahead and give some quick thoughts on the six stories included, and the overall vibe, in a more official review situation.

Language of Thorns is a collection of fairy tales set in the Grishaverse and, in the same way that that universe is inspired by and has shades of our real world in it, these stories are informed by the mythology and folklore we will find recognizable as well. I will give little blurbs about each tale, of course, but want to start by saying that one of the real gems of this collection is the illustrations. They are on each page of the book, and grow and develop alongside the story they're with. They are simply gorgeous and add so much visually to the way Bardugo's words bring these stories to life. Definitely a reading experience that you'd want the physical copy of the book for.

Ayama and the Thorn Wood -- A combination of a sort of minotaur in the labyrinth and Scheherazade's tales, with a fun letter versus spirit of the law twist on the meaning of "bring me someone’s heart." Looking past skin deep for beauty and connection is always a great message in fairy tales, but this does it in a more subtle/subversive way. Plus, the king as the bad guy, trying to be secretive but not smart enough to be more sneaky about it, is a cool take on the more conventional "power corrupts" theme. “They pray for sons with red eyes and daughters with horns.”

The Too Clever Fox -- Ohhhh that was dark (the good creepy/horror vibes kind, but without going so far as to be too much for me), and took a turn that I guessed *right* before it happened, but was enough of a surprise to sit well with me. This one had shades of Little Red Riding Hood and The Fox and Crow of Aesop’s fables. Some nice (and not as often seen) morals about not judging goodness based on beauty and not being too confident in one’s own cleverness (great encouragement to ask for help when you need it).

The Witch of Duva -- This one took a turn for the dark and gruesome, like pretty hard at the end. It was actually the toughest of all of them to read (kinda cannibalistic and also some very icky implied child sexual abuse aspects). As the story itself goes, it was a lovely flipping of Hansel and Gretel, where the witch/stepmother is blamed for everything (as a superstitious anti-woman evil), to shine a light on the always unsuspected (but usually at fault in reality): man. In this case, the cozy and/or protective vibes of the women, while still trying to provide autonomy for the young girl, were really nice to read. I kept waiting for the hammer to fall in that regard though, but when it did, it was in such an unexpected way and that was great, storytelling-wise.

Little Knife -- I loved this one, a new take on the classic "three tasks to win the bride" story, with the twist of sentient nature and Grisha magic to add some fun and uniqueness. This story has that unique fairy tale story narration style. The free woman finale, allowed to be herself without the gaze of others to tell her what to wear/do and where to go and using her for their own ends, was super uplifting and fulfilling. And the story to get there played out in a creative way.

The Soldier Prince -- This was like the Nutcracker and Pinocchio (kinda), with creepy pedo vibes from the toy maker and a wise-sage rat king. It was super creepy, with the dolls coming to live/people turning into dolls. Probably my least favorite of the bunch (but also my least favorite source/inspirational materials too, so take it with that grain of salt). “I know who I am without anyone there to tell me.”

When Water Sang Fire -- This was far and away the longest tale, but with good reason. There was a really cool magic system introduced (singing magic into being!) and some awesome sapphic mermaid vibes. Also, my partner and I have some suspicions about cameos from The Darkling and Baghra here, though that's mostly unsubstantiated. It felt a little long/slow until the end and OMG was this an Ursula origin story?! Totally redeemed and likely one of my top two of the collection after that ending!

And some wrap-up thoughts... I love the twist on story development/endings to have a fairy tale vibe but still reflect reality more so (with a distinctly femininist anti-patriarchal bent that I was *here for*). I enjoyed them all, though of course I had my favorites, as indicated above. What a fun way to finish out our time in the Grishaverse. If you're looking for a familiar, but also distinct, fairy tale reading experience, this collection is worth your time (and even more so if you can recognize all the easter eggs from the Grishaverse sprinkled throughout).

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