clovetra's Reviews (262)

i hate men named jacob black!!!!!!!
ok thats mean i dont hate him
im just a bit dead inside
i think what hooked me on to <i>twilight</i> was the relationship between bella and edward. this entire book was just jacob and bella fluffing around until edward loses his shit in Italy.
this was painful for me. i still cant rate this like a 2 because there was some edward moments!
and alice! my love. she makes everything better <3 welcome home to my brain
anyways yeah there were still some good edward moments and up until the epilogue i was like "ok cool this is an easy 4 star".
why was the epilogue like that????????
im sorry i hate the love triangle angle! im not a big fan of the trope as is, but the fact jacob is 2 years younger and so emotionally immature.... im sorry i cant. it feels forced and i hate it!
anyways here's to less jacob black, and more alice cullen

wow. that was incredible.

the way ziwe mixes the comedic with the incredibly poignant and serious actually has me in awe. from going to talking about she is afraid for her life in an airbnb to talking about her wikifeet score was magnificent. i don’t think i’ve seen someone mix comedy and seriousness this masterfully in my reading journey.

also, as a white person, i did learn a lot from this. obviously i’m not a mind reader, but learning that some things may be seen as microaggressive that never even crossed my mind now do. like the entire essay about “how many black friends do you have?” was something i needed to read. i really quite enjoyed that essay, it’s probably one of my favourites.

i also loved how ziwe tackles the intersectionality between womanhood and being black. obviously i have no fucking clue what that is like, and i know it does exist, but i’ve never actually heard a black woman explain their thoughts surrounding this to me. granted it’s never really come up in conversation, but i’ve also never asked. this had me reflecting on a lot of the behaviours i’ve thought were me being an ally, but were not really helping anyone.

i will say though. the fucking footnotes became the bane of my existence. and that is ENTIRELY the reason why this isn’t a 5-star.

yes i know ziwe explains the footnotes. and at first i found them charming! quirky! unique! but then they would span over 3-5 pages, and go on insane tangents, then i’d come back to the original essay and have forgotten what i’ve just read. the tangents are cute it theory, but some of them needed to be cut down for me to have not been annoyed at this book. like i was flipping back and forth between pages like my life depended on it. for some things i almost wish instead she just used brackets, but alas i am not ziwe 

anyways she gobbled the fuck out of this book go ziwe

im actually soooooooo normal about twilight
ok so confession - i have never read twilight before. or seen the movies.
until 2024.
FUCK THAT WAS GOOD???
now i will say. yes the book is cringe at points. like when edward literally eats bella's tears.
and also meyer is um. Odd! like calling jacob "indian"....... Erm!
but i did in fact gobble this book up so. i think im at fault here.
i don't know why i was so addicted to this book but i swear to god its laced with crack.
ummmm i actually cant put how i feel into words.
the ending ate, the story ate, the characters ate (shout out alice u remind me i like women), the pacing, everything (minus the cutesy-cringe moments & the microaggressions....)
i hate you alastair because im an addict. i need my next twilight fix.

fuck.
genuinely i think this is a must-read for everyone.
not only did this book educate me on what life is like as a palestinian in such an intimate way, both in the past and present, but it was also well written.
i found myself craving this book.
and my god the ending. i am this close to crying.
i have no words this was heartbreakingly good.

i went in thinking i was gonna love this book. and my main criticism was that i was just bored.
reading this i fully understand why people would love this! i just did not like the writing style at all. and i don't even mean all the speculative fiction. the voice used just didn't vibe with me. it felt very soulless and made me bored. but i did want to see what happened so this is why i did not dnf (also i didn't want any dnfs for 2023 lol don't ask me why) (its probably my autism)
i found it overall incredibly hard to connect with the writing, and not many of the stories were memorable to me.
now a big issue i could've possible had with this book is that this is very. ummm. Smart. writing. and i read this when i had covid! so i may have simply been too dumb to comprehend this and im not even joking bro covid gives me worms for brains.
i found this hard to rank too! like some stories i loved and some i wanted to claw my eyes out because of boredom. in the end i decided to just average out my scores per story but i did round down because ummmmm i wanted to. so lets delve into the stories individually !
los angeles: ok lowkey an odd way to start an anthology! um i kind of enjoyed this one? i liked how it ties into the next one but. the ending is weird. i also did not get what metaphor this is supposed to be! like i couldn't tell if she actually had 100 boyfriends living with her or if she was just a bit insane. did have a bit of a fun time though i won't lie. 2/5
oranges: this one fades into the background for me. i feel like the overall meaning is a bit clearer, as is the protag's voice. i cannot remember anything remarkable about this except where she enters the house. 1/5
g: so cute! this one actually had my attention, as i could empathise with the narrator, but yet again i have no idea what happens at the end lmao. could be my covid brain forgetting what i previously read, could be because my brain thought it wasn't important. the world will never know. 3/5
yeti lovemaking: easily one of the best in this anthology. so insane. balls to the wall core. i love the tenderness displayed and also just how insane this concept is. 4/5
returning: umm this was crazy! i love how a random country was made up i think that's so silly in a good way. anyways i like the interpersonal conflict, as well as the small exerpts from the in universe book. 3/5
office hours: ehh. it was a story. i didn't really find anything to enjoy in this. i think this is just a personal taste thing here, as i could see how this would be considered amazing. i kind of didn't like the protagonist, and not in a "love to hate" way but in a "ur boring" way. oops. 2/5
peking duck: ugh this was great. i forgot i was reading in this one. no comments. 5/5
tomorrow:aaaannnddd im bored again. i did like the dystopian-reality-core, but im sorry the arm really freaked me the fuck out. i could NOT get over the arm. also, with the other stories the ambiguous endings were chill! this ending just annoyed me ngl. i honestly think this should've been moved to the middle as for me, it ruins the pacing of the stories, and probably flows better next to g. but that's just me also shoving the stories i didn't like into one place. also i didn't write this so i should shut the fuck up. anyways personally this is a 2/5.
um i kind of want to read Severance because I've heard such good shit about it!!!! but i also heard good shit bout this and i didn't particularly live laugh love so. we'll see.
anyways much love clover-nation. and ling ma. mainly ling ma im so sorry my love

oh i am fearful for people to see this.
im going to be honest - i haven't read too many celebrity memoirs, but this.... was the worst ive read.
now, i will say, i am a britney stan until i DIE. she is an icon, a legend, and she is the moment. i was in the trenches during her conservatorship, and i wish her nothing but peace for the rest of her life.
however, this was incredibly surface-level.
now, i understand this is her book!!! she can choose how much she wants to spill!! and truly she did spill at some parts. but if you don't want to reveal a lot, why write a memoir.....
i understand how her life has been traumatic & understand how dredging up those feelings and memories may have been too painful for her. but in that case, why write a memoir about it?? i also know she wants to raise awareness on conservatorship but girlie i promise you did not have to write a memoir to achieve that.
i also would like to say the writing is incredibly..... lacklustre. i know she said she's been robbed of her childhood & womanhood..... and i can tell. the writing is incredibly juvenile and lacks depth. like when she'll describe an event, she'll go "i loved that. it was great". like my last celebrity memoir was <i>im glad my mom died</i> so my expectations for a celebrity memoir are incredibly high. idk i felt disappointed. it also felt like the same points were just being reiterated regarding certain events over and over again, and then other events were barely even discussed.
however, this was incredibly addictive to read, and allowed me a new insight into mother herself. i hope she is living her best life, because god knows she fucking deserves it. queen shit. 

i loved this so much
this was such a cute & lighthearted read
plus as a cat owner reading about things my cats do made my little heart sing
easily my favourite junji ito book :')
bless up yon little homie

oh wow
this was a very conflicting book. but one i ultimately fell in love with.
let me start with the positives, as although i can't find too many negatives with this book, they are quite jarring.
first, going into this book, i thought the "lgbt+" tag was queerbating. did i know the story? nope. that was just my opinion. and boy am i happy i was wrong. i loved how unapologetic characters like harry and celia are, and it made my little heart sing.
i also loved jenkins reid's style of writing. this is my first time reading a book of hers, and i can confidently say i'll be reading other works of hers. this was scrumptiously written, and i adored every second. 
one final note is that evelyn is a protagonist you love to hate, and that is one of my favourite tropes, if not my *favourite* trope, so this book gets big ticks from me. 
now, on to the parts where this book failed.
a white woman so clearly writes this. explaining evelyn's heritage in the start and ending of the book, plus the way monique's race is described made me feel a bit sick if im honest. it was.... Not Good!
also the biphobia in this is fucking disgusting. i don't care if due to this being a historical fiction book its time accurate, as a queer reader it was fucking vile to see celia dunk on evelyn for the 50th time because she likes men and women. i wasn't too mad with how harry was portrayed up until the end. also im sorry did the d slur need to be included? im a lesbian and i feel that that word is reserved for black lesbians only. seeing jenkins reid throw that word out like nothing made me sick. and not in a good way reflecting the narrative, it soured me towards this book. i felt similar to this in regards to the misogyny & sexism present, as well as the extreme domestic violence portrayed. yes, it is reflective of the times this book is following. it still should've been written with some tact. 
this book was very conflicting. and even writing this review i am still largely conflicted on how i feel. but, i will say, even if i find a book shit, if i don't want to put it down, in my mind its worth an additional star. and i actually could not get this book off of my mind. 

what no internet does to a mf

IM GOING TO VOMIT THAT WAS SO GOOD
I AM SPEECHLESS.
i have no complaints except that the third and final book isn't here. i bought it yesterday and booktopia says it might take until 2024..... i don't think my soul can take that amount of time waiting.
anyways that cliff hanger was magical and had me gasp out loud, the lows of this book were tense and the highs were intoxicating. each dimension was as good, if not better than the russian dimension. also im sorry i don't care how cliche this book is, with its love triangle and evil corporation and an abundance of plot twists. i DONT CARE!!!!! anyways i need to read about my baby girl paul RIGHT NOW.
ive only read fanfiction about the tv show lucifer (i don't want to talk about it /lh) but i reckon i'll be reading fanfiction about this series after ive finished the last book. claudia gray i could marry you