Take a photo of a barcode or cover
bisexualbookshelf's reviews
793 reviews
Anna Marie Tendler's "Men Have Called Her Crazy" is a candid, raw exploration of mental health, gender dynamics, and personal trauma. Tendler's stream-of-consciousness style is fresh, witty, and darkly humorous, offering a poignant reflection on her struggles with anxiety and depression. Her narrative seamlessly jumps between past and present, providing a layered insight into her deep mistrust of the world around her.
From the very first page, Tendler hooks readers with her evocative prose and brutally honest introspection. She addresses the "good girl complex" and its manifestation in her life, even in places like psych wards. This exploration is represented by standout passages about her time in the psych ward: “Most of my life, my outward presentation has not matched my inward reality, but with my body gaunt, my face droopy and puffy at the same time, I'm forcing the outside world to confront a more honest - and probably scary - version of my mental state.”
One of the book's strongest elements is its portrayal of feminine solidarity. Tendler’s experiences with the other women in her treatment facility highlight the complexities of female relationships, marred by her initial anxieties but eventually offering a form of solace and understanding. This camaraderie is beautifully illustrated, yet the lingering effects of her anxieties persist, capturing a very real struggle many readers can relate to.
However, while the book shines in many areas, it has its shortcomings. Tendler’s aversion to men and the subsequent exploration of her past relationships with them are compelling but become repetitive towards the end. The narrative's focus on her relationships post-hospital feels like a shift from insightful mental illness analysis to a more straightforward "I hate men and my life sucks" sentiment. This pivot diminishes the earlier depth of her reflections.
Moreover, Tendler's acknowledgment of her privilege, or lack thereof, is a glaring omission. Her ability to renovate a home to a "haunting Victorian mansion" post-divorce highlights a class privilege that goes unacknowledged, leaving a gap in the narrative. A simple acknowledgment of this privilege could have added a layer of depth and awareness to her story.
Despite these critiques, Tendler’s exploration of trauma, especially regarding her "good girl complex" and control issues, is both enlightening and relatable. Her poignant reflections on how these issues have shaped her life and relationships are some of the book's most compelling aspects. For instance, her reflection, “I cemented my role in relationships as a pleaser, a convincer, a girl who, well into adulthood, would contort and conform to the desires of a man, overlooking his easy dismissal, and dampening her self-worth, all to be loved,” is a powerful commentary on the internalized struggles many women face.
In conclusion, "Men Have Called Her Crazy" is a mixed bag. Tendler's writing is undeniably powerful and evocative, particularly when discussing her time in the hospital and her struggles with mental health. However, the narrative's latter sections and overall lack of class consciousness make it fall short of its potential. This book will likely resonate with readers who appreciate raw, introspective narratives and those who relate to Tendler’s experiences. Compelling and beautifully written in parts, “Men Have Called Her Crazy” ultimately lacked the cohesion and depth needed to make it a standout memoir in my mind.
📖 Recommended For: Readers who appreciate raw, introspective narratives, Admirers of Stream-of-Consciousness Writing Styles, Those Interested in Exploring Gender Dynamics and Trauma, Fans of Jennette McCurdy’s “I’m Glad My Mom Died.”
🔑 Key Themes: Mental Health and Recovery, Feminine Solidarity, Good Girl Complex and Control Issues, Gender Dynamics and Trauma, Self-Discovery and Personal Growth.
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Animal death, Mental illness, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts
Moderate: Toxic relationship
Minor: Alcoholism, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Infidelity, Sexual content, Sexual harassment
In her debut novel "But How Are You, Really?", Ella Dawson crafts a poignant and heartfelt narrative that delves deep into the complexities of a queer millennial’s journey toward self-acceptance and healing. The story centers around Charlotte Thorne, a bisexual artist grappling with the harsh realities of adulthood, an abusive past relationship, and the daunting invitation to her five-year college reunion at Hein University.
Charlotte's life is far from what she envisioned. Estranged from her parents and stuck in a dead-end job working for a wealthy egomaniac, she is a portrait of struggle and resilience. Dawson masterfully portrays Charlotte’s internal battle, highlighting her financial insecurities and the constant façade she maintains to appear "fine." This struggle is beautifully encapsulated in Charlotte’s introspective moments, such as when she reflects on her dissociation and isolation: “How long had it been since she felt present in her own life, alert and exposed and wanting?”
One of the most powerful aspects of the novel is Charlotte’s intricate relationship with her ex-boyfriend Ben. Through their history, Dawson provides a stark depiction of intimate partner abuse, detailing the manipulative tactics like love bombing that Ben employed. Charlotte’s learned self-isolation from this toxic relationship serves as a powerful commentary on the long-lasting impact of abuse. Yet, this novel is not defined by Charlotte’s trauma but rather by her journey towards healing.
Reece, the endearing "one that got away," emerges as a beacon of hope and potential for rekindled romance. His character, a sexy golden retriever love interest, brings an element of warmth and sobriety to the story. His journey through alcohol abuse recovery adds a layer of depth and representation to the narrative, illustrating that recovery and love can coexist. The delicious tension and unresolved feelings between Charlotte and Reece provide a hopeful contrast to her painful past.
Central to Charlotte’s healing process is her queer chosen family. The support group they form for those with dead or disappointing parents, known as the 3Ds, becomes a source of strength and community care for Charlotte. Dawson’s depiction of this chosen family is tender and authentic, emphasizing the importance of found family in the queer experience: "Her friends helped her see that there was nothing weak about her grief, her resentment, or her fear," a line that beautifully underscores the novel’s theme of communal healing.
Dawson’s prose is both lyrical and evocative, yet remains grounded and accessible. She captures the raw emotions and inner turmoil of her characters with precision, making Charlotte’s experiences deeply relatable. The queer empowerment themes and class consciousness woven into the narrative add a rich layer of social commentary, making the story not only personal but also relevant to broader social issues.
"But How Are You, Really?" stands out as a queer millennial coming-of-age story that resonates deeply with its audience. Charlotte is a character who embodies the anxious, introspective, and ultimately resilient spirit of many young queer people today. Her journey from isolation to embracing community and self-love is both inspiring and empowering.
Ella Dawson has given us a novel that feels like a conversation with a close friend, one that leaves you feeling seen, hugged, and understood. For fans of Haley Jakobson’s "Old Enough" and all the "shy until you get to know them" bisexuals, this book is a must-read. It is a testament to the power of community, the courage to confront one’s past, and the hope for a brighter, more authentic future. Thank you, Ella, for this unforgettable story—I will be thinking about it for a long time.
📖 Recommended For: Enthusiasts of Queer Coming-of-Age Stories, Readers Interested in Themes of Healing from Trauma, Admirers of Character-Driven Narratives with Class-Consciousness, Fans of Haley Jakobson’s "Old Enough" and Queer Chosen Families Books.
🔑 Key Themes: Recovery from Intimate Partner Abuse, Class Consciousness and Financial Insecurity, Queer Identity and Bisexual Representation, Community Care and Self-Acceptance, The Journey Towards Healing From Trauma.
Graphic: Sexual content
Minor: Alcoholism, Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Mental illness, Suicidal thoughts, Death of parent, Abandonment, Alcohol
I listened to this on audio which I'm not great at processing and didn't take notes so will forgo a full review for now but I absolutely recommend this to queer or feminist readers, as well as lovers of women-versus-the void/unhinged FMC fiction. I will definitely be getting a physical copy so I can annotate the fuck out of it.
Love love love. Miranda July can do no wrong.
"Shae" by Mesha Maren is a poignant exploration of the intersection of poverty, teen pregnancy, medical trauma, and opioid addiction, set against the evocative backdrop of the American Rural South. Mesha Maren's novel follows the tumultuous life of Shae, a 16-year-old girl who becomes fixated on Cam, a fellow outcast. As Shae navigates her feelings for Cam, a transfemme teen, the narrative unfolds into a raw and compelling journey of love, struggle, and survival.
Shae and Cam’s relationship is the heart of the novel, marked by an intense connection and Shae’s compassionate yet confused adaptation to Cam’s transition. Maren’s portrayal of their bond is deeply moving, capturing the essence of youthful love complicated by the harsh realities of their lives. Shae’s acceptance of Cam is beautifully rendered, highlighting her deep-seated need for love and security, despite the overwhelming obstacles they face.
One of the most striking elements of "Shae" is its unflinching depiction of poverty and its ramifications. Maren paints a vivid picture of the relentless challenges faced by those living in poverty, particularly focusing on the neglect and exploitation experienced by low-wage workers. The novel delves into the chaos of parenting in such conditions, especially poignant as Shae herself is still a child grappling with the responsibilities of motherhood. Her love for her daughter Eva is palpable, yet overshadowed by the haze of her addiction, a tragic consequence of the pervasive opioid epidemic.
Maren’s writing shines in its atmospheric evocation of the Rural South. The descriptions of pine trees, dirt roads, and cicadas immerse the reader in Shae’s world, enhancing the narrative’s authenticity. However, as Shae’s addiction deepens, the narrative begins to lose focus, mirroring her descent into self-destruction. This narrative choice underscores the devastating grip of substance abuse, illustrating how it can spiral out of control, particularly in the absence of financial resources and adequate support systems. Maren’s portrayal of Shae’s addiction is both compassionate and harrowing, providing a sobering look at the impact of the opioid crisis.
The novel is not without its flaws. The ending, while powerful, leaves the reader with a sense of unresolved tension as Shae’s life continues to unravel. Despite this, Shae’s strength and her unwavering sense of self shine through, making her a memorable and compelling protagonist. Her journey, marked by moments of love, despair, and resilience, is a testament to the human capacity to endure, even in the face of overwhelming adversity.
"Shae" is a vital read, offering a deeply human perspective on issues that are often marginalized or misunderstood. It is a story of love and survival, of the desperate lengths people go to for a semblance of security and the devastating consequences of systemic neglect. Maren’s novel is a heart-wrenching yet essential exploration of the complexities of life in poverty, particularly through the lens of those most vulnerable. For readers interested in stories that highlight political liberation themes and diverse representation, "Shae" is a compelling and necessary addition to your reading list.
📖 Recommended For: Readers drawn to stories of resilience in the face of adversity, fans of gritty portrayals of poverty and addiction, supporters of LGBTQ+ narratives, enthusiasts of contemporary Southern fiction, and those interested in the impact of the opioid crisis on marginalized communities.
🔑 Key Themes: Intersection of Poverty and Teen Pregnancy, Medical Trauma and Opioid Addiction, LGBTQ+ Identity and Transfemme Experiences, The Harsh Realities of Low-Wage Labor, The Struggles of Young Motherhood.
Graphic: Death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Medical trauma
Moderate: Transphobia
Minor: Animal death, Bullying, Child abuse, Homophobia, Infidelity, Self harm, Death of parent, Abandonment
“Fire Exit” by Morgan Talty is a nuanced exploration of family, grief, memory, and inheritance in Indigenous culture, as seen through the eyes of Charles, a white man raised on an Indigenous reservation by Frederick, an Indigenous man. Charles, who has escaped the grips of alcoholism, leads a relatively stable sober life until his estranged mother re-enters his life with advancing memory loss, prompting him to consider reconnecting with his estranged daughter, Elizabeth, who doesn’t even know they are related.
Graphic: Child abuse, Homophobia, Dementia, Death of parent, Fire/Fire injury
Moderate: Gun violence, Abandonment
Minor: Ableism
Minor: Racism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence
Graphic: Racism
Moderate: Misogyny, Grief, Death of parent
Minor: Adult/minor relationship, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Gore, Mental illness, Suicidal thoughts, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Police brutality, Cannibalism, Suicide attempt, Alcohol, Sexual harassment
Graphic: Abortion
Moderate: Drug use, Misogyny, Sexual content, Police brutality, Fire/Fire injury
Minor: Child abuse, Fatphobia, Suicide, Alcohol, Pandemic/Epidemic
Graphic: Suicide, Death of parent
Moderate: Self harm, Dementia, Alcohol
Minor: Child abuse, Drug use, Infidelity, Sexual content, Police brutality