abbie_'s Reviews (1.79k)

When I read By the Sea by Gurnah last year it was possibly one of the most frustrating reading experiences of 2023. The first part was brilliant, gorgeous writing and the characters fleshed out beautifully. But as the book went on it slowed to a crawl and too many characters/stories within stories to keep track of. But I thought, given the start, I’d give him another chance - sad to report I’ve been burned again 😭 Afterlives switches from utterly compelling to utterly dull within a page or two. I would be completely invested (typically with Afiyah’s sections but the boys had compelling parts too), and then five minutes later be on the verge of falling asleep after one too many descriptions of joinery or ~trade speak~.

I did appreciate learning more about the colonisation of East Africa by the Germans. I said this about another book I read this year (The Cursed Friend), but remembering the violences of colonialism in literature is often restricted to British and French colonisers. I’m glad for books which immortalise the horrors inflicted by other European entities as well, so they’re not forgotten or swept under the rug.

But my other complaint is the ending - after 270 pages of glacial storytelling, the ending gave me whiplash. At least 50 pages of story is condensed into 10, making the ending feel too abrupt.

I think I’ll probably stop here with Gurnah’s oeuvre… but Gravel Heart does sound good so maybe I’ve not learned my lesson yet!

I’ve been a bit stingy with my five stars this year - or actually, I just think I haven’t been reading much deserving of five stars! I scoured my Scribd list for something I’d been looking forward to (I still have an annoying habit of ‘saving’ books for an unspecified time) and landed on Little Blue Encyclopedia (for Vivian). My prediction skills were clearly on top form that day because I loved every second of this odd, moving little book. I wish it had been 200 pages longer. It’s framed as a journal/memoir but is very much fictional, a trans woman mourning the loss of her best friend and unrequited crush, another trans woman - Vivian. Unsure how to sort through her tumultuous feelings and grief, Zelda settles on writing an encyclopaedia of their favourite obscure show, Little Blue (also fictional and bizarre in its concept). I’ve got no idea where Plante came up with this idea, but it’s legit perfect for the story. It just works. Amongst the backgrounds and lives of fictional (fictional) characters, we get anecdotes and memories of Vivian, beautiful and joyous and flawed and loving and so robustly alive - despite being dead before the novel begins. Just a gorgeous ode to trans sisterhood, friendship and grief. Loved every page. 

My second Etaf Rum novel in 2024 and I loved this one more than Evil Eye. Having the perspectives of three women/girls helped it feel more well-rounded, and made the effects of intergenerational trauma more stark and tough to bear. As always when reading a book by an author from a background traditionally marginalised in western publishing (Palestinian-American in this case), I always hope people will read with nuance, and not come away painting the experiences of all Palestinian-American women with one brush. This story tackles domestic abuse and violence against women under patriarchy, and it goes to some dark places. Through Fareeda, Isra and Deya we see three women who have had their choices taken away from them, and their struggle to reclaim that agency and take charge of their future choices. Some are more successful than others, some end in tragedy.

The audiobook was very well done, though I preferred the narrators for Deya and Isra - thankfully they did make up the lion’s share of the chapters.

I also just reread my review of Evil Eye where I said I’d definitely go for a print version of this book lol. I’m a sucker for a technically free audiobook (thanks Spotify)

Thanks to the publisher for my free digital ARC of Antiquity by Hanna Johansson, translated from the Swedish by Kira Josefsson. I’ll generally request most books based on vibes on Netgalley, and if they’re translated or queer literary fiction I’ll almost definitely request it. So when I saw this one was literary, queer AND translated, I immediately pressed request. Perhaps I should have paid more heed to the blurb likening this to a queer Lolita retelling. Next time an author has an idea for any type of Lolita retelling, I’m going to need them to just put that idea in a little box in the back of their mind and lock it up 🙂

I’m being a bit dramatic - Antiquity is not as grotesque as Lolita, but the fact remains it is a story of a grown woman embarking on an affair with a 15 year old. The blurb describes it as perverse and there’s no condoning of the behaviour but I just… it felt unnecessary.

Icky subject matter aside, the writing also felt cold. It felt objectively beautiful, but it was lacking a soul. I felt disconnected from the beginning and I only really persevered because it was short.

Other reviewers seem to have had a better time with this one, so definitely check out their reviews too for a more balanced opinion.

I started this book on my iPad two days ago because my print book was quite dense and I thought I needed something light to read in between. What then happened was I didn’t read a single page of my print book for 48 hours because I was absolutely engrossed in this book, literally could not put it down.

I’d heard from other readers that this book was MESSY and lord they were not wrong - and I was here for every second of Feyi’s mess and questionable decisions. Literally, get whatever you need, Feyi. I did feel like Nasir was a little hard done by in some of his characterisation though - even when hurt, his actions seemed out of place for the man he’d been portrayed as up until that point.

I’m so glad Emezi’s publishers have so much faith in their talent that they just have free reign to jump around as many genres as they please. So far I’ve read their YA, literary fiction and memoir, and now romance, and each one just has this energy. You Made a Fool of Death With Your Beauty is an MF romance but both MCs are bisexual and it’s all done so beautifully. The sexual tension is 👀

This book is not just pure escapism (though the description of the island and Alim’s mountain home made me want to jump on a plane immediately). Emezi also writes a beautifully painful ode to grief, to losing the love of your life far too early and too cruelly.

A must read if you’re after a messy romance with plenty of heat and heart!

Thanks to Libro.fm and Penguin Canada for my free ALC! 

A collection of essays from a white, queer ex-Jehovah’s Witness turned porn star turned author, this book intrigued me from the get go. However, I expected more of a memoir and overlooked the fact it was written as essays. As a result it felt quite disjointed and scattered. It seemed we’d spend ages on one topic that could have been shorter, then quickly brush past a huge chunk of his life to arrive somewhere else - it could be a bit disorienting. I actually found the later essays, when Cox had left the JWs and Canada for New York and was forging his own path as a model. These sections felt raw and honest and well thought-out, whereas the sections about his youth growing up in the JWs felt muddled. I imagine it takes a lifetime to heal from the trauma of growing up in a cult-like religion which hates queer people, and so I can forgive that Cox might not have the ability yet to write with utter clarity about that time in his life.

Would definitely seek out some of this author’s fiction, and would be interested in reading from some of the other authors mentioned in this book who left the religion. 

An odd, dreamy little novella filled with strange little episodes that push it towards the sci-fi realm, while still remaining rooted in the reality of a trans woman of the 21st century. Our protagonist remains without a name, moving through life and her transition as an older trans woman. I’ve read a few books this year which focus on the ‘older’ trans experience, and I’m extremely grateful that these stories exist. DeNiro explores contemporary issues trans women face such as fetishisation, threats of violence (though she always remains aware of how white privilege tamps down this threat compared to trans women of colour’s experiences), navigating parenthood and a past cis relationship. There’s also a lot of moving parent-child stuff regarding her own parents, how you can love a person even when they do harm, and how to navigate that. As well as these real-world issues, we also have secret societies of trans women pulling the strings, flatpack boyfriends who arrive at your door in suitcases, and a few more otherworldly pieces, some of which left me scratching my head a bit.

I’m never a massive fan of second-person narration, and tbh I’m not sure how much it added here. But a short little piece I devoured in 24 hours with a lot to say!

All the Lovers in the Night is my third book by Kawakami and unfortunately my least favourite so far. I usually love a melancholy little book about women in their 20s dealing with who they want to be, but I found this one a drag to get through. The most compelling parts were the bits that dealt head on with Fuyuko’s depression, which she tries to drown out with alcohol. As someone who also works from home and struggles with depression, those parts did resonate. It’s fine like between revelling in aloneness and feeling lonely, and Fuyuko regularly topples over into existential dread. Maybe part of my ambivalent feelings about this book are to do with Mitsutsuka, the love interest who is simply mediocrity embodied in a middle aged man.

Some beautiful writing, but just not as engaging as Breasts and Eggs or Heaven. 

Translated by Sam Bett and David Boyd.

Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for my free digital ARC of this one! I read a lot of emotionally weighty ‘no plot just vibes’ fiction, so I do occasionally like to pick up a book which I know will be all plot, plenty of action, and I’m just here to be entertained. That’s exactly what I was looking for when I requested We Used to Live Here on Netgalley, a horror novel about a queer couple who flip old houses and get more than they bargained for with an isolated house in the mountains - and I’m glad to report that’s what I got! I’ve seen other reviews talk about plot holes and I’ll be fully honest, I wasn’t looking for any. I was reading to be scared (I was) and so in my view this book was a success!

I like it when horror novels incorporate documents, interviews, articles etc, something Marcus Kliewer does here to great effect. A few of the mixed media pieces included did leave me scratching my head at their relevance, but everything contributed to the creepy, otherworldly, unexplained mystery vibes that We Used to Live Here is Built around. In fact, me being confused may even have improved it, as it put me on similar footing to the MC Eve, who is constantly being gaslit and unsure of what’s real and what’s in her head.

A rollercoaster of a ride, quite a few genuinely creepy moments that made me very glad my girlfriend was at home with me while I was reading, and overall just atmospheric vibes which is all I really was looking for!

My thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for my free digital ARC! I requested this one because which bookworm doesn’t love a good book about books? The premise of this memoir is Nanako recently separating from her husband, finds her career stagnating, reaching a turning point in her life. So she signs up to PerfectStrangers to meet new people and give them book recommendations. While I did enjoy the book recommendations aspect (such a shame that so many of them are not yet translated into English!) I thought overall it felt a bit superficial. I’m finding that unfortunately with a few of the memoirs I’ve picked up this year - too much telling and not enough showing, and too much ‘this happened then this happened then this happened’ without the author taking time to ruminate and reflect on those events. I learned at the end that a good chunk of the book had first been published online, and that made sense. Some sections just have that quick-read quality of an online article, and I sped through the book as a whole.

There were some good parts about navigating online spaces and meet ups as a woman (one part made my jaw drop, the audacity of men). And I also liked the emphasis it placed on platonic friendships - I’m so glad Nanako was able to form such relationships as a middle-aged woman, as sometimes it seems like it’s impossible to make friends after your twenties!

A little underwhelming, but wholesome enough and obviously a testament to the power of a good book recommendation.