This is definitely a really important book and I just wish I had enjoyed it more than I did.
I want to start my review with what I really liked about the book: I love the cover. I like Tara a lot, she's a really interesting character and even though I sometimes felt frustrated with her being so completely unable to express her wishes and desires to anybody else the further I got into the story, the more sense it made. And at least thats something she managed to develop over the course of the story. She is definitely a character you can find yourself rooting for, even though your heart breaks for her constantly as she doesn't really have any real friends and even the few people she starts to form bonds with often cross boundaries or act inconsiderate, which made me feel for her a lot. I like that not everything is black and white and especially Tara tries to be comfortable in these inbetween zones even if it isn't always easy at times. This made for an interesting story. In general I enjoyed that a lot of characters existed in this tough inbetween place of being somewhat prejudiced while trying to do the right thing, but failing. Some of them managed to do better by the end and that felt really good to see. I also liked the sapphic relationship, that was cute. And finally I really enjoyed that Tara's existence as a trans girl who is unable to go on blockers or hormones is discussed. While others may doubt her gender, she knows who she is. There are also one scenes that deals with arousal causing further dysphoria and I found the frankness around that discussion refreshing. And I enjoyed that she was able to find gender euphoria in her relationship, despite being unable to eliviate it in every aspect of her life.
Now to what I did not enjoy: the writing style was stillted and awkward at times. Some dialogue especially was just weird. And the plot was choppy and so scenes that I wish had been explored more fully just weren't. The characters fell a bit flat for me due to that. And I disliked how Tara treated Liam at points. She once thinks that he could have been a really pretty girl and ignores how he must feel as the only out trans guy at an all girls school and only believes that he faces transphobia in his own family after a cis girl confirms it to her, even though he has complained about it multiple times. The first comment really shocked me and it just feels really weird for a trans character, who understands how painful it is to be misgendered by other people, to just randomly have a thought like that without ever examining it. I also disliked that the first time we are introduced to Liam she immediately decides he is overexaggerating the transphobia of his own family. Her thinking might have made sense if we had seen him overexaggerate things before (and we definitely do see him cross her boundaries repeatedly later on) and so this scene just really did not make me feel like they have any real form of friendship besides the fact that they are the only trans kids. Plus I didn't really enjoy the way the Sybils were seen as Oh So Different from the vapid normal girls, the only ones who care for truth and justice, when everything they did in the book are things that could have happened without a secret social club (shopping, reading books & picking fake names are something that doesnt have to be confined to a secret club...) and so I did not really understand their appeal and why Tara was willing to risk so much just to join them especially in the beginning of the story. I would have liked her to have some further motivation or exploration why she thinks her desire for female friendship cant be fullfilled elsewhere and in general I think this book would have profited from more depth, especially with pretty much every characters' motivations (but especially Angel, Tara & Liam) and the way the school works in general.
This unfortunately kept me from really being drawn into this book as I had hoped I would and so I can unfortunately only give it two stars, but I do enjoy that we have a book that really examines the pain and prejudice that can be caused by an unjust government, transphobia and racism and why it is important to stand against that (even if it is only through seeking joy and self-acceptance as Tara does).