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Sister Funtime by Spencer Hamilton
4.0

**Review originally published in SCREAM Magazine**

Sister Mary believes she has found the perfect job when she comes to work at St. Teresa’s Joyous Youths Orphanage. She loves her work and the children, who have affectionately nicknamed her Sister Funtime. Though the headmistress is unreasonably rigid, earning her the whispered title of Sister Killjoy, Mary isn’t going to let that stifle her happy labor. But then, an alarming incident prompts Mary to examine her surroundings more closely, and she begins to unravel one horrifying secret after another. What was once a dream job quickly becomes a realm of nightmares.

Sister Funtime packs a lot into what was a fairly quick read. I enjoyed the mystery aspect as well as the supernatural elements, and it took many twists and turns that I did not expect. Indeed, it became clear early on that this was a book that would defy easy explanation, so I just released the reins and enjoyed the ride. I wouldn’t exactly call this a violent story, but there were more than a few moments of shocking brutality that had me wincing as I read.

Following Sister Mary’s descent from exuberant innocence to maniacal madness is an unsettling and fascinating experience. She’s someone you’re rooting for, but you also worry about her fragile mental state and what she’s slowly becoming. The transformative process she undergoes through the story is incredibly disturbing, but you can’t look away. You just wish she would see the crucifix she believes harbors God for what it really is; that its smile is too wide, that the glint in its eye is unnatural, that the tasks it demands and penance it requires are a far cry from holy.

Author Spencer Hamilton has crafted an intriguing tale of religious horror that works as both a standalone novella and an entry into his burgeoning Smilyland mythos. A playful linguistic style, a captivating, conflicted protagonist, and an enjoyable balance of supernatural, psychological, and body horror all make this an easy must-read recommendation. So come on in, smile wide, and don’t forget to say your prayers!