It took me 2hrs post finishing this book to even realise I’ve not ate anything the whole day bc of this book 😭 the moment i picked the book up today till I flipped that final page I didn’t stop to eat drink I didn’t come up for air not even for any guests that came, this book was the very definition of consuming. It became my life force and now that it’s over I actually feel destitute, idk what to do with myself 😫

I laughed, I cried — shoulders shaking, tremors racking my entire bruised and battered body from every blow, nose stinging, swollen red eyes, ugly fat tears running down my face wetting the pages of my book. God. My heart bled for Joey. I loved him since book one, was as good as gone for him the second he spoke. 

I have so many words, so many feelings for this book. It was by far my favourite in the series. Joey is by far one of the most complex and compelling mmc’s I’ve ever had the pleasure to read about. The shit he’s been thru and the way he handled everything to the way he.. *I’ve started tearing up omg… and now I’m crying those fat tears again with my chin wobbling and eyes stinging — the whole works* he makes me emotional like no other. Genuinely, this is a first for me, I just think about him and I tear up because I remember everything he’s been put thru how he felt during it all and just… he deserved so much better, so so much better. 

There’s this inexplicable feeling i get where whenever Joey is out of the picture or not in the scene I’m always tense with the thought that anything could go wrong but as soon as he enters or speaks the tightness eases and I feel like everything will be okay, he will take care of everything. Joey makes me feel safe. He just has that presence and it makes me cry because of all the reasons he’s had to be this way, of what it took from him to turn out the way he has, to be the protector… and I’m crying again. 

The last two parts were so healing but really valuable to me. The way Aoife’s worries and complexes around the baby weren’t neglected or sidelined for Joeys struggles. As Aoife would say, they’re mirrors and everything they are is because of each other and for each other. Their love was all encompassing and raw but the best thing about their relationship was their foundation being friendship and loyalty and trust. I would absolutely MELT when he would refer to her as “my best friend” even after they got together. Like it’s such a small thing but it wasn’t to me — it was everything as someone who isn’t a big fan of friends to lovers THIS is how it’s done right. 

I’m so proud of him and his growth, seeing Aoife grow to not only put her baby first but also place those boundaries it was so rewarding even if it was painful as hell to swallow. As much as this book broke me, it also pieced me back together with gold and I’m better for it. I don’t think I’ll ever get over Joey the hurler and I never want to. 


𝗦𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲:
Not me crying the entire time writing this review 😭 no bc I’ve got fresh tear stains on my face I’m a mess just thinking about him. 

A huge huge thankuuuu to my support angels Hoda and Clace for listening to my tearful rants and appropriately gaslighting me when I asked for the lies I needed to hear to keep me going 😭 u were right it was full to the brim with so much happiness I couldn’t take it !!!!!! (I can’t wait to return the favour when u guys read addicted Calloway series 😝👹)

𝗦𝗼𝗻𝗴𝘀: 🎧
Need a break — jann 
Family line — Conan gray
Promise — jann
Remains of us — amira elfeky
Can’t break me — lemarvin
Bonnie & Clyde — Beyoncé & Jay Z 
Get by — jayci 
Boy who’s so blue — Brooke Williams 
Hell or high water — Andrew raposo
Lookin at u — ciara 
Like I love you — Justin timberlake
Old wounds — pvris


𝗙𝗮𝘃 𝗤𝘂𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀:

“Hey, queen”
“Hey, stud”

“Nice shirt”
“Nice legs”

“I just wanted a burger”
~THE WAY THIS HAD ME PEALING WITH UNCONTROLLABLE CACKLES