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readwithmesashamarie 's review for:
Dumplin'
by Julie Murphy
You can see the full review here http://akamissfiercereviews.tumblr.com/post/144622378790/dumplin-review
Initial Thoughts:
When I heard about this novel, I knew my reading experience could go one of two ways: it would remind me of myself and I’d love it, or it’d be mostly about snobbish pageant girls picking on the body confident fat girl and I’d hate it. When the actual reading experience ended up being a third and totally unexpected outcome, I knew I had to write a review and try to unscramble my many, many thoughts.
Spoilers! *and personal ramble*
Our main character has always been confident in her skin, even when society, in the form of high school jerks, yells at her that she shouldn’t be. Her mom is the head honcho of the towns beauty pageant, her idol is gives-no-s#*!s Dolly Parton, and the hot boy at work is falling in love with her. Everything makes sense in her life until he touches her. It’s not even him touching her that’s the problem, it’s him touching her fat. I’ve been there, I get that, but I never had the mental struggle this character does when she decides *spoiler-ish* she’d rather be alone than ridiculed every time she walked hand in hand with the hottest guy in the room (aka the guy she loved). I was waiting for our character to have some sort of revelation about being okay with herself, when really this novel follows her digression into the uncharted waters of self-conscious land. Call it pack mentality, or what have you, but I digressed right along with her.
I was expecting to feel uplifted, hopeful, and proud of who I am after reading this novel. Instead I felt defeated, hopeless, and depressed about my current situation. I’ve been on a mission to lose weight and get in shape since the New Year (yes, I’m that resolution-er). In the past 5 months all I’ve managed to accomplish was changing the shape of my legs *a little* and adding the slightest hint of muscle definition to my arms. This year is the first year I’ve worn a bikini in public, with any semblance of confidence (real or faked). I know I don’t have a desirable body. I know my friends might be thankful to have me standing there next to them on the beach, because I make them look better. I know I work my ass off in the gym, and the endorphins make me feel incredible. I know I can lift more than some of the guys who watch me, with confused looks on their faces, while I work out. I knew all of this and yet, reading this novel made me question myself. Are those things enough? Will it ever change how I look physically? Will I ever look the way I envision myself in my head and feel incredible about it? Or will I always see the fat friend in the mirror? By the end, I felt like I was resigned to be the fat girl, like my stomach is something I’ll never be able to overcome.
Despite my negative reaction to this novel, I don’t necessarily think it’s something we shouldn’t read. In a way, it’s darkly refreshing. To witness, through the written word, the internal struggles of a girl like me who is confident in her body, transition into uncharted territory is important. Life and the journey to body positivity is not all sunshine and rainbows. It is not a linear or exponential journey you can map out on a graph. The media might portray body positivity as the depressed fat girl becoming confident, but I’ve never seen a confident girl question herself the way our main character does. Watching our main character descend into her new self-conscious shell allowed me to start cracking through my own. Even though I went to a low point while reading this book, I think it was worth it. Even though I questioned my worth, my body image, and my own confidence, I’m now able to piece together what makes me matter.
I am more than my body shape. I am more than this cage that carries around my *if I may be so bold* amazing personality and my genuine soul. I am more. I deserve love. I deserve happiness. No matter how I look and no matter how others see me. I know I’m doing what’s right for me, even if my body (through your eyes) says otherwise.
Conclusion:
Books that make me think, that make me question what I know to be true, books that rattle me as much as this one did, are profound blessings in my life. I may have had a negative experience reading this book, but I learned something(s) about myself. Not all novels accomplish this task, and for that I am thankful. I’m not sure why Julie Murphy wrote this novel or what her intention was, but it was brutally honest and told a story I’m not sure everyone wants to hear. But that’s exactly why we should. Whether you agree or disagree with this message or the character’s journey, I think Dumplin’ is an important book that should be read and discussed.
Rating:4/5
Initial Thoughts:
When I heard about this novel, I knew my reading experience could go one of two ways: it would remind me of myself and I’d love it, or it’d be mostly about snobbish pageant girls picking on the body confident fat girl and I’d hate it. When the actual reading experience ended up being a third and totally unexpected outcome, I knew I had to write a review and try to unscramble my many, many thoughts.
Spoilers! *and personal ramble*
Our main character has always been confident in her skin, even when society, in the form of high school jerks, yells at her that she shouldn’t be. Her mom is the head honcho of the towns beauty pageant, her idol is gives-no-s#*!s Dolly Parton, and the hot boy at work is falling in love with her. Everything makes sense in her life until he touches her. It’s not even him touching her that’s the problem, it’s him touching her fat. I’ve been there, I get that, but I never had the mental struggle this character does when she decides *spoiler-ish* she’d rather be alone than ridiculed every time she walked hand in hand with the hottest guy in the room (aka the guy she loved). I was waiting for our character to have some sort of revelation about being okay with herself, when really this novel follows her digression into the uncharted waters of self-conscious land. Call it pack mentality, or what have you, but I digressed right along with her.
I was expecting to feel uplifted, hopeful, and proud of who I am after reading this novel. Instead I felt defeated, hopeless, and depressed about my current situation. I’ve been on a mission to lose weight and get in shape since the New Year (yes, I’m that resolution-er). In the past 5 months all I’ve managed to accomplish was changing the shape of my legs *a little* and adding the slightest hint of muscle definition to my arms. This year is the first year I’ve worn a bikini in public, with any semblance of confidence (real or faked). I know I don’t have a desirable body. I know my friends might be thankful to have me standing there next to them on the beach, because I make them look better. I know I work my ass off in the gym, and the endorphins make me feel incredible. I know I can lift more than some of the guys who watch me, with confused looks on their faces, while I work out. I knew all of this and yet, reading this novel made me question myself. Are those things enough? Will it ever change how I look physically? Will I ever look the way I envision myself in my head and feel incredible about it? Or will I always see the fat friend in the mirror? By the end, I felt like I was resigned to be the fat girl, like my stomach is something I’ll never be able to overcome.
Despite my negative reaction to this novel, I don’t necessarily think it’s something we shouldn’t read. In a way, it’s darkly refreshing. To witness, through the written word, the internal struggles of a girl like me who is confident in her body, transition into uncharted territory is important. Life and the journey to body positivity is not all sunshine and rainbows. It is not a linear or exponential journey you can map out on a graph. The media might portray body positivity as the depressed fat girl becoming confident, but I’ve never seen a confident girl question herself the way our main character does. Watching our main character descend into her new self-conscious shell allowed me to start cracking through my own. Even though I went to a low point while reading this book, I think it was worth it. Even though I questioned my worth, my body image, and my own confidence, I’m now able to piece together what makes me matter.
I am more than my body shape. I am more than this cage that carries around my *if I may be so bold* amazing personality and my genuine soul. I am more. I deserve love. I deserve happiness. No matter how I look and no matter how others see me. I know I’m doing what’s right for me, even if my body (through your eyes) says otherwise.
Conclusion:
Books that make me think, that make me question what I know to be true, books that rattle me as much as this one did, are profound blessings in my life. I may have had a negative experience reading this book, but I learned something(s) about myself. Not all novels accomplish this task, and for that I am thankful. I’m not sure why Julie Murphy wrote this novel or what her intention was, but it was brutally honest and told a story I’m not sure everyone wants to hear. But that’s exactly why we should. Whether you agree or disagree with this message or the character’s journey, I think Dumplin’ is an important book that should be read and discussed.
Rating:4/5