// Notes on Grief by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

"For the rest of my life, I will live with my hands outstretched for things that are no longer there". - Adichie


Notes on Grief is a sad and moving book of essays that Adichie wrote after her father's demise. The year 2020 saw a lot of deaths. No matter how hard one tried, there really wasn't anything they could have done when a loved one had died oceans away. All you could do was watch it all on a video call. When the world had stopped moving briefly during the virus outbreak, Adichie's renowned and well respected father passed away silently. He was a man who was loved by the entire community and even more so by his children. Adichie's words drip of grief, of unbearable anguish with an edge of accusation. Notes on Grief gives meaning to the pain you've been feeling after suffering a great loss.

I read this book quickly but not before I hugged the words close. I saw my own loss reflected in her lines. My own anger and then acceptance that the person is now truly, really gone. Her writing is exquisite and raw, pain shining till the very last page. She speaks of her father with love, admiration all the while thinking that she'll never be able to see him again.

I will keep this book close to me and reread it again when I suffer another impending tragedy because books like these are important to understand that loss is really inevitable.

I'll leave you with this line that Adichie writes at the very end.

I am writing about my father in the past tense, and I cannot believe I am writing about my father in the past tense.