Disclaimer: I received an e-ARC from netgalley in exchange for a review. 

When Providence Byrd’s mother goes missing, she returns to the hometown she left, first for a 5-year sentence in prison and then 8 years trying to eke out a living as a felon. The last time she was here, she drove over her mother with her car. But that’s not the only past that haunting her here, from the sisters she abandoned to her abusive father, the adults that betrayed her throughout her childhood and the mother she hasn’t talked to in 13 years there’s a lot of memories to doge her every step. 

I really enjoyed reading about all the characters (except the father holy shit), even if not all of their actions are kind, they can be understood in the multi-faceted portrayal of every character. I loved seeing the many ways people here had chosen to survive, even if it means betraying or abandoning another person. In general, the relationships portrayed here were a really strong point. The complicated sibling relationship, the even more complicated relationship to their addict mother, helpless to save her children in any way, Providence’s understandable complicated feelings for the former police officer that never helped her out as a kid and the current chief of police, who is investigating her mother’s disappearance, but judges her for being a felon as well as her old flame Zoe, a former Jehova’s Witness now turned republican congress woman. 

My favorite relationships in here was Providence’s connection with her best friend Sara, an Oglala Lakota woman, whom she met in prison and who gives her a place to stay and Gil, a black man, who her father was horrible racist to, but who opened his door as a refuge for little Providence when she needed it (but failed her in equally horrible ways by never trying to actually protect her). 

At points reading about the father was tough. When this story deals with abusive parents it really does not pull any punches and the ptsd of the main character (and her sisters) and the way it warps their own relationships to each other and to their bodies plays a huge and heavy role. 

The mystery concerning the mother’s disappearance is compelling, but even after it is solved there is still more than enough emotional and interpersonal turmoil happening to keep you reading, desperate to find out if there can be a happy-for-now after all these horrible, horrible events. 

All in all, this is a fascinating and intriguing read that functions as both a great character study not only for Providence, but for all the characters we are introduced to (except the father, who tbh, doesn’t need more character. What he’s got is bad enough) and a layered mystery with intriguing twists and turns. I really enjoyed reading it and the end felt satisfying in just the right way. 

TW: alcoholism, car accident, domestic abuse (physical, including spousal and against children), emotional abuse, past addiction, racism (discussed), self-harm (graphic), sexual abuse (implied), substance abuse, suicidal ideation, threats of murder, violence