Wow. This is a book for and of our time not just because of the content which pushes the bounds of definitions of abuse previously understood, but also for the goddamn wonderful experimental, textural prose. Each chapter is titled as "Dream House as ______" and most are vignettes of one page or less. Machado breaks herself into two versions of herself so that "you" is her character of the past and the "I" is the better off self of the present, looking back. This adds to the ease with which a reader can place oneself (yourself) into each situation, allowing for maximum impact as the relationship escalates and breaks apart. Machado makes reference to the original film Gaslight and its remake, the Framingham Eight, a group of women imprisoned for killing their partners (7 men and 1 woman), signs of folk literature (often marked at the bottom of the page), turbulent relationships between other remarkable writers of the previous centuries, and even has a section constructed in the style of and named after Choose Your Own Adventure®.

Machado's words here on a granular level were brewed with the power of the torture she describes throughout and are further heightened by the strength she found after the end of her relationship with the woman in the Dream House, after the freedom she reclaimed and with the clarity of hindsight. Her experience, as she mentions with that hindsight towards the end, can easily be laden with clichéd descriptions of fearing for her life, waiting her out, and metaphors of love, etc. and which thus become descriptions that many readers, queer or not, having lived explicitly, through a physically/psychologically abusive relationship or not, will be able to relate to. Machado also aptly presented snippets of her younger years, to give example to how she has, for years, been anxious and inexperienced with romantic partners, until she noted her bisexuality and how she had gained practical experience but the woman in the Dream House was still a first for her, her first proper girlfriend. So, everything she threw at Machado, actual or verbal, Machado took, feeling she deserved it, thinking that her girlfriend's outbursts and criticisms were exactly what she deserved.

Knowing now how properly revered Machado is as one of Literature's great contemporary voices, it pains me deeply that for the duration of her time in the Dream House, Machado lived through constant fear of bullying and humiliation, always tiptoeing around the other woman's unpredictable temper, sometimes getting too comfortable and mistakenly setting it off in public or private, and using her base instincts to just get them both home safely just so Machado can then be berated again for doing every little thing wrong.

I'm enormously thankful that she decided she had the stamina to write this tome and do the research on the history of heterosexual and homosexual abuse in relationships AND THEN took up the responsibility to create a new archive by combining personal testimony, pop culture, and historical fact which can and will show all readers how despite the prevalence of the "battered woman", we have to extend our sympathies beyond a straight, white woman struggling under the angry control of a man, to cover and believe the experiences and abuses of gay men and women, gender non-conforming people, trans people, and ALL people of all races and sexualities in relationships of any combination of the above.

I feel akin to her in how much catharsis I felt reading, and how much I hope she felt while writing. When I feel intense emotions, rage or confusion or joy, I take to the page to make sense of it or take note of it to return to again to relive it and make sure I did justice to the reasoning behind whatever was driving me. In the Dream House will act as a sort of guidebook for me for years to come. It points to the potential of how many different ways one can craft a personal essay and, I think, how necessary it is to be honest with oneself and push the bounds to share the hardest, most personal topics because, ideally, both the writer and the audience can forever seek solace and knowledge and growth from between the pages that were so carefully created.

I'm grateful for this book. How many times can I say that? I'm just so proud and in awe of this woman. I cannot wait to see where the hell she is going to take us along to in her next story or the next. I will trust the expanse of her gorgeous mind for the rest of our lives. Amazing.