Oh, my.

I didn't expect at the first to love this book as much as I did. I related too much to Sammie, I think. Although I didn't do debate in school, I was choir council president and the drum major and an honor graduate. I pushed myself just like Samie did. All the while I was watching my grandmother lose layers of herself to Alzheimer's. By the time I was in high school, my Nanny didn't know who I was.

This book was like reading a mashed up version of myself and my Nanny.

It affected me so much more than a typical YA book might. Because of my grandmother's experience with dementia, I too am more likely to suffer from it one day. I'm an extremely nostalgic person at heart. So as I read about Sammie reverting back to her childhood memories I thought about what that might one day be like for myself and what it might have been like for my grandmother. Perhaps it wasn't all and won't all be terrible.

I've spent some time in memory care centers recently and am exploring the idea of ministry there in a year or so. This book helped me realize that I really feel called to that kind of work. Even though this book was about a young person's experience with dementia, it is powerful. It's also not romanticized like all the other "I'm sick but in love" novels I've read recently. I'm looking at you, [b:Midnight Sun|34152811|Midnight Sun|Trish Cook|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1517747987l/34152811._SX50_.jpg|55190805] and [b:Five Feet Apart|39939417|Five Feet Apart|Rachael Lippincott|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1529358577l/39939417._SY75_.jpg|61834577].