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anyaemilie 's review for:

5.0

4.5 stars

Content warnings: This book is not for the faint of heart, and I definitely missed some. See the Trigger Warning Database's review for more.
Spoilerschool shooting; car accident; child abuse (recounted); child sexual abuse/rape referenced (occurred in the past); attempted sexual assault of a child by an uncle; absent parent; murder (graphic); homophobia; racism; attempted suicide (recounted)


I didn't quite know what to expect from this book, but I ended up really liking it. I do feel strange saying that about a book where the protagonist spent most of the book suffering--either being haunted by ghosts and ghouls, by bullies, or by feelings of inadequacy. He is one of the only Black kids at his school (the other being his older brother, with whom he doesn't really get along), so he mostly keeps to himself. He doesn't have many friends, and the fact that he can see dead world means that he's constantly distracted by ghosts who are stuck in their death loops. Death is all around him, so no wonder no one in the living world wants to spend any time with him.

The dead world is just something Jake has to deal with. The ghouls and ghosts can see him, but they can't touch him. Until the ghost of a school shooter appears in his life. Jake isn't sure why he's the target, but this kid clearly isn't done killing people.

There is a lot of interweaving of themes in this book: Jake feels alienated, and that feeling comes from several places. He doesn't feel close to his family because his mother is gone for long stretches of time for work, and he and his brother are so different. Jake is gay, but hasn't come out to anyone, which makes him feel lonely. He's also Black in a school of mostly white kids, and is bullied for it. Plus, seeing ghosts is another thing that separates him from everyone else. So he feels very much like it's him against the world (both the living and dead worlds), and he's not entirely wrong. He's quiet as a defense mechanism and tries to blend in to the background as much as possible, but the events of the book start to pile up so much that that isn't an option. Jake has to overcome his insecurities and ask for help, from both the living and the dead, to defeat Sawyer, the vengeful spirit of the school shooter who is back to kill more people.

The one thing that kept me from giving this 5 stars is that some of the actions scenes were a tad confusing. There was a lot of description in some of the scenes where Jake was fighting ghouls, and I got a little confused as to what exactly was happening. But overall this was a great book, and I definitely recommend it!