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desiree930 's review for:

The Sweetness of Forgetting by Kristin Harmel
4.0

3.75 stars.
After the first chapter or two, I wasn't sure what I was going to think about this book. I wanted to reach through and shake Hope, the protagonist, for letting her bratty pre-teen disrespect her in public with no repercussions. This urge to shake Hope persisted throughout the novel, at different points for different reasons. However, I appreciated the journey that she went on, and I really enjoyed many of the other elements to this story.

I liked the historical fiction aspect of this story. True, it's not a true historical fiction, since most of that information is related to us through story and flashbacks and isn't always a cohesive narrative. But throughout the story we are able to take the bits and pieces we learn and weave them together to understand how all of the pieces fit. I've read many historical fictions taking place during WWII, and this actually taught me a few things I didn't know, such as the fact that Muslims assisted Jews in their attempts to escape from Europe during the war.

I like the idea that Hope is connected to France, and Paris in particular, and can't quite explain why. I felt the same connection the first time I visited Ireland, where my ancestors were from. I always say that Ireland is in my heart, so having her character feel a similar connection was pretty cool.

I liked the inclusion of the recipes and appreciate how important baking and food was for her family. I also appreciated how this book stresses that every culture has traditions when it comes to food that are very important to those respective cultures. The scene where they have dinner with an Albanian family really showcases the importance of culinary tradition.

I also thought that the author did a good job at portraying Alzheimer's. As someone who has had loved ones struggle with this disease, I could empathize with Rose's family as they watched her slowly forget them. Rose's chapters were also really beautiful and sensitive.

As a character, Rose was definitely complex. As her story unfolds in front of us, we learn that she was far from perfect, and that she has a lot of regrets and things she would do differently. There are also things that she is very unapologetic about, even as she admits that they don't paint her in the fondest light.

This is not a perfect book. I felt like there were some clues that were too easily figured out, and leaps of logic that didn't seem organic. There is one scene in particular, where
Gavin and Hope are trying to find Jacob. He lives in New York City. They track down his apartment, and he's out. Hope realizes at once where he's at in the city. It holds special significance for him and Rose, but seriously? No chance he was just at the grocery store or something?

The moment the clues would start to dry up, one of the characters would have an AHA! moment where they would have a random hunch that would totally pay off and allow them to continue their quest. It just felt a little contrived in that way.

Also, I found Hope to be a little dull as a character. She's often self-pitying and has very low self-esteem. She lets her daughter continually disrespect her in front of other people and rarely checks her attitude. She holds the pessimistic view throughout the book that just because her marriage didn't work, it must mean that love doesn't exist. It's a little extreme, and it's only there in order to set up a big payoff at the end where she realizes that 'true love is real after all!' Honestly, my favorite scene with her is when she tells of her ex-husband and his new girlfriend for treating her daughter like crap. You finally see some backbone from her and it was about darn time.

When the end of the story happens, it's just a little too contrived and ties up too neatly. The fairy-tale lover in me loved it, but it's not the most realistic of scenarios.

There is a theme throughout this book about allowing yourself to love and being vulnerable to another person. From Rose to Josephine and finally to Hope, they've all kept their distances from the men in their lives for their own reasons. Regardless, people throughout the book tell Hope that she should give Gavin a chance. She rebukes it at every turn. Then people start to insist that they are in love. This is before they've even had a real date or shared a kiss. But they are supposed to be in love? Okay...no. I liked Gavin. He was there for Hope and Annie when they needed him. He was kind, helpful, and just an all-around good guy. But I never felt any chemistry between them. None whatsoever. They go from being somewhat awkward acquaintances to Hope explaining to him all the reasons it would be a terrible idea for them to be a couple. I feel like there wasn't any transition in their relationship. So...kind of the same problem I had with people figuring out next steps with such ease.

Also, Annie needed to be flicked upside the head a couple of times. Sorry, not sorry. I know I was an asshole to my mom when I was growing up (everyone is at one point or another), but I never, NEVER would've behaved that way in public, especially at my mom's job.

Anyway, I know it seems like I had a lot of issues with this book, and I guess I did, in a way. But at the end of the day, I read this book in one sitting and had an emotional reaction while reading it that really made me feel for these characters, and feel for the thousands and millions of people who were brutally tortured and murdered just because some bigoted piece of garbage decided their blood wasn't pure enough.

Anyway, I think I'll check out more from this author in the future when I'm yearning for some adult contemporary.