[This probably could (and should) have been a full 5-star read; however, I have aphantasia which means I was literally incapable of visualizing any of the delightfully detailed descriptions. An experience which sucks as much as you imagine it does.]

While I don't always buy into comp titles, it is absolutely fair to bill this as Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy meets Eurovision — and the best of both. (Or, well, I've never actually watched Eurovision but this seems to capture the spirit, based on my fundamental knowledge of it and other reviewers' feedback.)

FRTC.

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CONVERSION: 13.2 / 15 = 4.5 stars

Prose: 8 / 10
Characters & Relationships: 7 / 10
Emotional Impact: 9 / 10
Development / Flow: 9 / 10
Setting: 10 / 10

Diversity & Social Themes: 5 / 5
Intellectual Engagement: 4 / 5
Originality / Trope Execution: 4 / 5
Rereadability: 5 / 5
Memorability: 5 / 5