This is an interesting collection of Essays by Kai Cheng Thom. Written in a similarly lyrical style to her other work, I found this one at points sadly lacking in comparison to Falling Back In Love with Being Human. This collection is definitely a lot angrier, but at times also more defeatist and still often times caught up in the (shattered) dream of a queer utopia, and so I did not enjoy every essay in here. Some of them felt quite insular and inspired by the authors own personal experiences (which is obviously fine!), but were then portraid as universally applicable, when that just is not the case.
However I still found myself moved and inspired by other essays.
Part one mainly deals with problems in leftist circles centered around autonomy and call out culture. I found this part to be important and interesting, in particular "Stop Letting Trans Girls Kill Ourselves". Part two deals with trauma and (sexual) abuse in queer communities, as well as the dangers of abusive mentorship in marginalized communities. Especially the hardship of facing abuse in a marginalized community and being unsure how to speak out about it when your abuser might also be marginalized is something that has been discussed more and more in recent years and I found these essays interesting but lacking in depth (again the dealing with isolated experiences and portraying it as universal). Part three, my favorite part and the one that enabled me to give this a four star rating despite being not aaaas excited about part two as I had hoped I would, deals with familial connection and Kai Cheng Thom's experiences as a transgender woman of Chinese descent. This part was touching and moving and I enjoyed most of the essays in here, but particularly "Rediscovering Identity at my Grandfather's Funeral", "The Chinese Transsexual's Guide to Cheongsam" and "Where did she go?".
All in all I am still glad I read this collection of Essays and there are interesting aspects in it, but compared to her later work or "Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars", it wasn't as groundbreaking as I had hoped it would be.