When My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness first came out, multiple friends recommended it to me because of the sections that deal with learning about sex through yaoi manga. I have read zero yaoi manga, but I have read and written a large amount of m/m fanfiction about other media (BBC Sherlock, Star Trek, and Marvel *cough* *cough*). Gay, bi, and queerplatonic romances between men were a stepping stone for me. The problems in that are a kettle of fish for another time, but they did draw me to this book and caused me to pick it up from the library.

What I found when I actually read My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness is not just a dissertation on why getting sex ed from m/m romance comics causes problems. It is that and a lot more. The "plot" of the memoir is simple: Kabi hires a full service sex worker for the afternoon as a step to becoming a more emotionally well adult. What led up to this encounter and the fallout add depth and context. Reminiscent of Alison Bechdel's Are You My Mother? and Fun Home, Nagata Kabi recounts her psychological struggles and grapples with their consequences.

Kabi's raw, honest look at herself is startling to witness. How her mental health affects her appearance, job prospects, and creative output feel all too real to me. Her earnest decisions to learn and do better: I make those too. I think my only complaint is it's quite short. I wanted to dwell certain places longer and dig more into the day-to-day reality of consciously changing behavior.

The intimacy of the subject, Kabi's earnest truthfulness, and the airy, whimsical art style all work to make the reader feel like Kabi's friend and wish her well. I'm definitely looking forward to the next volume. I heartily recommend this one to all the women who love women out there who have ever doubted themselves. We'll get through this.