Its never ideal when you go into a book with incredibly high expectations. Every part me wishes that this was a five-star read. It should be based purely on the countless moments that I cried; on the many nights I have stayed up thinking about the circumstances of the characters. Sobbing for the pure fact that the words written are all but too true and a daily reality for so many people in our world, still to this day over a decade on. 

I have read a few reviews and noted that a fair few people have written that they wished Rasheed had changed his ways or that his story finished differently, as cruelly as the life he enforced for example. Or that the book was just a constant continuation of one horrible situation after the other. That the brutality towards the women wasn’t necessary in such detail… But is that not the reality for so many people? None of these aspects of the book bothered me – made me cry yes, but I don’t feel like they negatively impacted the story at all. In fact, I didn’t expect the ending of this book to finish as it had, at no point did I ever expect a ‘positive’ ending. I was both pleased and disappointed by it, in some ways it didn’t feel believable, in others it’s a notion to keep on fighting and never giving up. A beautiful and positive message in world surrounded by cruelty. Not that the entirety of the ending was positive but for the most part it was hopeful and love prevailed, albeit heartbreaking. 

A lot of reviews also have also mentioned the lack of political siding by the characters Mariam & Laila. And the next to no insight except that of those that surround them. Even then it doesn’t go too deep into it. I was not off put by this, also I cannot have much of opinion without reading other non-fiction text. Nor after that would I have a right to form much of an option on their situation or political sidings, and why or why not Mariam & Laila did or did not have strong opinions. This was a novel about two women and how their lives entwined, yes, the political and social forces around them controlled their lives but the novel was an insight into how they lived, fought, loved and kept on going despite the world around them.  

Without breaking down the entirety of the novel I am not sure why I am so reluctant to give this five-stars. Perhaps it just wasn’t as powerful as I was expecting. Or perhaps on a different day it would be five stars. It may just be that I wished it was twice as longer and explored their lives on an even deeper level. Today however it is 4.5 stars, raw emotional, gut wrenching, triggering and a piece of literature that makes you question, think and seek more information. And that’s exactly when I plan to do.