I'll Be Gone in the Dark: One Woman's Obsessive Search for the Golden State Killer by Michelle McNamara is an incredible book about a chilling case that will have you triple checking your doors and windows at night.

I first heard about the case of the Golden State Killer on the podcast My Favorite Murder. Alex and I listened to that episode while driving up north to spend the long weekend in the mountains. The case made us both incredibly uncomfortable and it really suck with us.

When I first heard about Michelle McNamara's book, I was hesitant to pick it up simply because of how unsettled details about the case left me. However, when I heard the news that the GSK was caught, I went out and picked up the book the next day.

Now that I've finally gotten the chance to read Michelle's book... I'm just blown away.

I have to admit that I was a bit worried that this book would be too dry, since it was labeled "True Crime." But oh my goodness... That was not the case at all!

First of all, I have to say that I absolutely adore Michelle's writing style! She shared the dark details of the case in such an unflinching manner, while also seamlessly adding in bits and pieces about her own life that really took the book to a whole other level. In fact, a big part of this story is about how Michelle obsessed over this case, and she certainly didn't make an attempt to gloss over how much it affected her life. It was so raw, and so unfiltered.

Michelle really had a way with writing these sequences that totally captivated me. More than just a few times, I found myself holding my breath. One perfect example of a scene that had me literally one the edge of my seat and holding my breath as my eyes flew over the pages is below (don't worry, I'll just include a very small part in the midst of a larger story):

The baby-faced man turned slightly, sneakily, and drew a gun from his coat pocket, promptly firing it at McGowen. McGowen fell backward and things suddenly went dark. The bullet had struck the officer's flashlight.

Every now and again, Michelle would drop in quotes that victims of the crimes reported the GSK saying to them, which petrified me. The case itself is such a horrifying tale, but I really enjoyed learning more about it in such a well-researched and wonderfully organized way.

Bravo, Michelle!

My favorite passages:
Looking back now, it feels as though I was born into a party that had started to wind down.

I had no particular interest in crime aside from reading the occasional Nancy Drew book growing up. Yet two days after the killing, without telling anyone, I walked to the spot near our house where Kathleen had been attacked. On the ground I saw pieces of her shattered Walkman. I picked them up. I felt no fear, just an electric curiosity, a current of such unexpected, searching force that I can recall every detail about the moment- the smell of newly cut grass, the chipped brown paint on the garage door. What gripped me was the specter of that question mark where the killer's face should be. The hollow gap of his identity seemed violently powerful to me.

I need to see his face.
He loses his power when we know his face.

The baby-faced man turned slightly, sneakily, and drew a gun from his coat pocket, promptly firing it at McGowen. McGowen fell backward and things suddenly went dark. The bullet had struck the officer's flashlight.

There were often signs of his presence in a neighborhood before he struck, small, disquieting details only understood in retrospect.

It would become like a game of hangman he refused to lose, all the guesses wrong, the stick figure nearly fatally hung; Crompton kept the last move open, staving off defeat by waiting until he, or one of his successors, could reverse the momentum and fill in the blanks. Only then, the final letter correct, would the long, bruising chase in the dark end in the simplest but long-sought-after prize: a man's name.


My final thoughts:
A must-read for any true crime fan. This case will give you the chills and keep you up at night, but you will absolutely love the way that Michelle laid it all out for us. But prepare yourself, this isn't a typical true crime novel; this one will hook you from the start and not let you go.