This was a surprising 5-star book for me. Going into it, I wasn't sure what I was going to think. Normally this kind of story wouldn't necessarily appeal to me, but I kept seeing rave reviews and decided to check it out.

Even while I was in the middle of the book, I never thought I would end up giving it 5 stars. It's told in two different timelines (the first is a specific day in time, the other is directly after that day and for the next six years) and while I do tend to enjoy those stories, knowing that the one timeline was headed for this catastrophic event and the fact that it kept switching from one POV to another made me feel a little disconnected from those characters. We don't ever really get to know any of them, with the exception of Edward and perhaps his family.

So imagine my surprise when we finally get to the point of the book where the crash is detailed, and I realized I was crying. I'm not someone who generally cries while reading. Movies and television? Yes, I'm a crybaby, especially if the score is well-done. But even when I feel sad or moved by a book, I don't usually cry. And I think that if the book had simply focused on Edward and his family, I still would've been moved, but I don't know that I would've felt the heartbreak that I did after learning bits and pieces about these other characters and their stories. Also, being introduced to these people in this way gives the letters Edward receives more impact than if we just focus on him and his grief.

I always find it interesting when movies or television shows kill off characters with no resolution to their arcs, but then I try to remember that that's life.. I would imagine very few of us actually get a fully-resolved story, and this book explores that in a way that I wasn't expecting to have as big an impact as it did. As we got closer and closer to the climax, I kept hoping that what I knew was going to happen wasn't actually going to happen. Perhaps we would realize it was all a terrible dream, or that the crash only existed in the script Edward's mother was writing. Maybe there's another version of our universe where the plane landed safely and everyone was able to go on with their day-to-day lives.

As far as the other timeline goes, I felt like the author did a fantastic job weaving this story about grief and trauma with a really authentic coming-of-age story. He goes through all of the ups and downs that all adolescents face through their pre-teen and early-adult years, while also having to deal with the deaths of his family and being thrown into the public eye and all that would entail. I loved his relationship with Shay and her mom, and the way he's ultimately able to connect to his aunt and uncle. There is a moment where his aunt decides to wear one of his mom's shirts to an interview because it made her feel powerful and he realizes that just as he lost a brother, his aunt lost a sister. It's a terrible thing to offer common ground, but his ability to make connections to the people around him is what helps him through his grief and trauma.

I don't usually talk about books in relation to book clubs, but I feel like this would be a great one to sit down and dissect with a group of people. There are so many interesting themes running through that were so well-crafted.

I also thought it was evident that the author did a great deal of research when writing this book, and learned in the author's note that she actually used black box transcripts to recreate the dialogue between the pilot and co-pilot in the second half of the story. The great thing is that it doesn't feel like the information is shoved in there. It all feels very organic in the way it was woven into the book.

I think this is going to be a book I'm going to think about for a long time.

This book will definitely not appeal to everyone.