This is a really interesting novel following a young genderqueer person coming into her own identity while looking for connection in the past.
Dawn is a book conservator, who feels unable to express her identity fully anywhere. At work her boss makes snide comments and harasses her anytime she dares to dress more masculine, at home her genderqueer partner does not seem attracted to her if she embraces the feminine side of herself and neither her parents nor her other friends truly understand her. Unable to deal with this she throws herself into researching the life of a german woman named Gertrude whose message she found in a lesbian pulp novel she was restoring.
Besides being an interesting look at nonbinary/genderqueer/genderfluid identity in a time where there wasn’t a fixed term for these identities yet, this novel also beautifully examines the way in which prejudice and hatred particularly in times of social changes (such as post 9/11 new york and pre-nazis rise to power in germany) target and damage especially those of us who are visible different and stand out. It also explores the way art can be healing and help us form connections, that we might otherwise miss.
The writing style was also something I enjoyed, especially the short chapters, as it simply dragged me along on the journey. I especially enjoyed the discussion of art and especially the big artpiece Dawn planes at the end.
TW for graphic physical violence, hatecrimes, homophobia, transphobia and racism.