This review was originally published on the book review blog: justonemorepaige.wordpress.com.

This was my first book by Colleen Hoover. I've seen her name around, but before this book it was just in passing. And then, essentially, this book blew up bookstagram. So I naturally had to see what everyone was talking about. Based on her other books and the description of this one, I was expecting a basic, if slightly more compelling than normal (based on the rave reviews) love story. And while there were definitely some elements of that, this was also much more.

To start, the romance elements. There were many things about this book that really made me want to give it 3 stars. They are the types of things that are often part of romance novels that I respect are part of the genre for a reason, but are partially why I don't read it widely, as a rule. Primarily, things are just too easy: Lily (the girl) meets homeless guy that actually turns out to be amazing and in the end (no spoilers) very successful/conveniently there when he's needed, girl meets gorgeous/rich/talented random guy, girl ends up magically (in a city as big as Boston) "hiring" his sister and they all become best friends (like convenient and, potentially to an unrealistic extreme, supportive friends), SO many rich people (and successful people - even Lily herself) that it pushes the imagination that it all happened organically. Just, those pieces of the plot, the first section of the book, are predictable and too easy. Also, the writing itself nothing special. There are parts where the dialogue falls flat and the inner thoughts Lily has are a too easy way to "tell" instead of "show," used to the extent that it's a bit of a crutch. Similarly, the "diary" entries to Ellen Degeneres become a story telling crutch as well. However, there are some cute elements from them, related to Ellen, like Dory and "just keep swimming," that make it a bit easier to swallow. And in general, throughout the book, after their first interactions (which, in my opinion, are still not necessarily realistic) I think the entire story line between Lily and Atlas is a bit overdone, a too happy counteraction to the tougher parts. But even though it's not all that realistic, I think I'm happy it was there because this isn't real life, it's a book, and I'm glad I had access to those positives in the end. Overall, the first parts were pretty normal and while it was a fast paced read and I was interested in seeing where it went (and I went in thinking it was mostly a love story, so I was expecting that and more or less ok with it - I needed a "lighter"/"quicker" read in my life right now), I wasn't overly impressed by anything.

Then the second section hit and things got real. I mean, the writing stayed meh, so things that may have actually been nearly impossible to read in other literary circumstances were only pretty difficult, if that makes sense. I feel like I was separated a little bit from what was happening by the less than perfect wordsmith-ing. However, the topics still hit like a ton of bricks. The trauma that Lily had experienced as a child was now coming back again, in full force, but this time (in the circular fashion that life follows) against her instead of her mother. And this part is what the description on the back totally doesn't hint at, which I find to be both sneaky and well done. The book hits harder because you don't know it's coming. Not to give too much away (since the author clearly didn't want that), but as vaguely as possible I'd like to commend the author for the way she handles writing about relationship abuse. Honestly, that part is gorgeously done, and it's what jumped this book to a 4 star read for me. It came on slowly, subtly, and you can see (just as Lily's mom describes to her) how with each little event, your limits are pushed just a little farther and a little farther, until you get to a place where you don't understand how you let it get so far. That conversation was a beautiful moment of understanding and bonding for the relationship between Lily and her mom, even in the midst of everything else. (In fact, that's the one time I cried.) In any case, the limits pushed happened to me, to us as readers, that same way. And that's the beauty, because it makes you re-think and better empathize with those for whom it happens to in real life. As Lily thinks/writes her justification, you find yourself kind of agreeing with her. What's she's saying does make sense. You, like her, have fallen in love with Ryle and just want to give him another chance. And these people aren't even real, they are characters, so it really makes you think how much harder this is in real life. How do you separate who/what you love from the parts that are getting out of control and starting to scare you? When do you become too afraid to be alone with someone, but at the same time not want to live your life without them? How do you make the decision to break everyone's heart, including your own? Where has person who always thought that "there's never a justification for that kind of behavior" gone? So many people struggle with this, and reasonably so. And so many others judge them for that. But putting myself in those shoes, imagining it's me and my partner, thinking about what I would forgive because I love him, it's definitely not as black and white as outsiders think. And the author did a beautiful job recreating that pain and indecision and justification and heartbreak for the reader to experience with Lily.

I read the afterward by the author: what this book meant to her personally, who she honored by writing it, the message she wanted to send. And I am impressed. She did exactly what she set out to do. And she created the right set of circumstances to do it in. She said at times she had trouble writing Ryle's reactions, that she had fallen in love with him, just like Lily, and wanted to rewrite everything. And that's the crux of it I think - that's what we all want. And Hoover wrote it well enough to make us all want that. But we all needed to go through the pain to see that's sometimes it's better after that pain. I'm so glad she didn't change anything, that she powered through and wrote what she did. And I'm grateful to the author and her parents, all of them, for allowing her to write and share this story. The title is perfect - it only takes one person with the courage to break the cycle, one person to say "it ends with us" - to make the future better for everyone that follows.