Rating: 4.5/5 stars

WOW, this book took me on a roller-coaster of emotions that I was not prepared for.

I don't know where to start, except to say that this was a really sad, but super powerful read, and I'm glad I got to this book now of all times.

Frances reminded me a lot of myself, especially when I was in high school. Just like Frances, I had a "school" personality and a "home" personality. I spent my time studying because that was what I was good at. Getting good grades so I could get into university was my only goal. Because that's what successful people did. Or so I thought. While Frances comes to some realizations by the end of this book, before she makes it to university, it took me a few years.

So, in a way. My story begins with Frances and ends with Aled. I didn't realize that studying science at university wasn't for me until my second year. And watching Aled go through what he was going through made me remember all those moments in my second year where I was just so tired, all the fricking time. It was absolutely awful, but I had no way out. So, I made myself an "out", but minoring in something I enjoyed. It made the last couple years somewhat more bearable.

What I really loved about this book, is the underlying themes of "success and university". It's such a horrible thing that is pushed down students' throats these days. It's like university is the only option if you want to be recognized as a successful and driven individual. Going to community college, or getting an apprenticeship, or just working is seen as "stupid, useless or a waste of time". I hate how people are judged based on grades and it's difficult to change that mindset even for me now. When I don't get the marks I want, I feel horrible, like I've failed. Even though I know that getting a bad mark (or a mark that isn't up to par with what I want), isn't the end of the world.

I wanted to talk a bit about Aled's mother. She's like up there with Umbridge as one of the most horrible people I've ever read about. I did feel like her obsession with her kids' grades was a bit too much, but then again, there are people like that out there who emotionally manipulate their kids into getting them to do what they want. Seeing Aled's struggle between doing what he wanted vs. doing what his mother wanted because he felt so helpless, felt way too real. It honestly got me thinking a lot about my own life. Actually...

This whole book had me constantly thinking and comparing stuff to my own life. And I really like it when books do that, even if it means staying up late at night thinking and worrying and stressing out. It's good sometimes to see other people/characters going through something similar. You don't feel as alone, even if these characters aren't real people.

I also wanted to talk a bit about the diversity in this book. I really wanted to read this book because I had heard there's demisexual rep, and even though it wasn't really mentioned till the end, it was really nice to read about. Frances is mixed race, which I loved too. Also her mother is literally awesome and I wish I could hang out with her irl. Everything else was just heart wrenching and sad – which is half the reason why I don't read contemporary books lol. They feel so real, compared to fantasy. But I also think this book was really important to read, even though it was hard at times.

Highly, highly recommend!