unfortunately i did not enjoy this.

so this is marketed as in the vein of the seven husbands of evelyn hugo. now i'm not gonna lie that book was formative for young gay gracie. i actually cried when i read it, so i had my hopes high for this, and this book just did not meet them at all.

this book follows cate kay, a famous novelist who has never revealed her identity and decides to write a memoir detailing her entire life out. her chapters are interspersed with chapters written by people close to her. we see how cate's life has unfolded, from her growing up in a small town with her best friend, to her running away and becoming a writer.

let's start with what i liked: the multiple pov's were a good choice; they allowed us to understand more of cate's character and why people were so drawn to her. i also thought fagan's writing was good; for a debut novel, i was satisfied with the writing. i also thought cate and amanda's relationship was well-done. i was rooting for them in the beginning. 

my main issues are that:
a. the relationships in this, apart from cate and amanda's relationship, seemed very superficial and not fleshed out. i have a hard time believing that ry and cate fell in love in a month. same with sidney and cate. it's also hard for me to believe that cate retained sidney as her lawyer for all those years following their breakup?? very strange stuff.

b. the huge mystery of amanda being dead. one google search and cate probably would have found out the truth so i don't really understand why this is the titular mystery like it's not that big of an issue 

c. cate is not that interesting of a main character. if you're gonna be an enigmatic novelist and nobody knows anything about you, you better be the most interesting person alive and she was not to me. i feel like the cultivated air of mystery around her made her seem like a more interesting character than she actually was. 

d. the ending pissed me off so bad because the ending isn't very satisfactory! all the buildup between cate/annie and amanda and it ends there?? i'started hitting my pillow i was so annoyed. and also lowkey i feel like the timeline of the books becoming a film feels unrealistic af how does a book get published and get a movie adaptation 1 YEAR AFTER??? i'm sorry i'm not in show business but surely that's too quick of a turnaround?

this book was disappointing to me. i couldn't fully get into it and connect with the characters. however, i think fagan is a good writer, and this being her debut novel is a good sign, because the writing was satisfactory. i'll keep an eye out for fagan in the future; hopefully i'll be able to read more of her writing. i would recommend this to anyone who enjoys literary fiction and women's fiction.