Listen. I know that I ridicule Faker (Sarah Smith's debut novel) all the time. But what Faker lacked in organic romantic development, characterization, plot, and writing quality, it made up for with comedic gold like "He is the god of thunder dipped in a milk bath" and "I’d wager his genes have never been infiltrated by a person of color."

Faker was hilariously bad. But Simmer Down is just so bad it's not even funny.

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Initial thoughts: