Has this author ever met a middle grader?? 

Why do these children speak like geriatric millennials or young gen x-er's?? 

Very hard to get into when a bunch of middle schoolers are speaking like slightly out of touch 30 year olds. Yikes.  

Also, the dialogue, the plot, the situations, everything feels like a very badly written Nickelodeon children's show episode. 

I love middle grade novels, this is one is not it, do not recommend.