Jonathan and Aaron Hernandez were subjected to constant fighting, yelling, and physical violence in their home as children. They were also not in a financially stable home. Their father was known to use and abuse drugs and alcohol, which probably contributed a great deal to the problems that Aaron had with drugs and alcohol later in life. There was also blatant homophobia directed at Aaron from his father, which was probably very traumatic for him after being sexually assaulted by an older kid and struggling with his sexuality. The death of their father was traumatic for both boys, but Aaron seemed to take that particularly hard. There was also an estrangement with his mother after his disapproval of her new romantic partner. There is no doubt that Aaron Hernandez was a talented football player, which I can even say, and I am not interested in football in the slightest. It is unfortunate that he squandered his talent on criminal activity.

Aaron Hernandez was involved with drugs and drug dealers. He was exhibiting paranoia in social settings, which could have been drug related, mental health issues, or a combination of both. He was easily offended and felt that he had to prove himself in all situations. Aaron found himself having several run-ins with the law and getting in trouble with his team for his behavior. Aaron was charged with first degree murder in the shooting death of Odin Lloyd and was almost immediately released from the New England Patriots and had all of his merchandise removed from the stores. Aaron was convicted of this murder, but died by suicide before his appeal was completed, therefore his conviction was vacated. (Something I did not know until I read this book.)

Aaron Hernandez had all of the ingredients for trouble. An abusive childhood, poverty, coming into money, drug and alcohol addiction, and possible mental illness. Jonathan was later diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and Aaron certainly exhibited some bizarre behaviors. Another major issue Aaron was faced with was Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE). Unfortunately, this can only be confirmed during autopsy, which Aaron's was. CTE is a serious issue in contact sports, and is a degenerative issue that affects behavior, judgment, memory, and impulse control. It has been said that the case of CTE that Aaron had was one of the worst seen in someone that young. His brain was labeled a stage 3 out of 4 for CTE. All of these things had to have contributed a lot to the mess that Aaron got himself into. Aaron always maintained that he was innocent and did not murder Odin Lloyd. If he did kill him, these factors do not excuse that, but do explain how he arrived at that point. If he was innocent, these factors explain how he arrived at the point where he was found to be a good suspect in this murder.

Regardless of the guilt or innocence of Aaron Hernandez, the fact is that someone is murdered. Someone's family member and friend is gone. Nothing is bringing them back, and they have to live with this loss and as victims of a crime. The family of Aaron Hernandez are also victims. They are victims of their circumstances and victims of the actions of Aaron. They are also victims of suicide. Suicide is a subject that I have strong feelings about for a host of personal reasons, and the abs cense of someone you love who took their life is just staggering. Aaron Hernandez was a victim of himself. The entire thing has left a wake of victims, and that is something to keep in mind when you read books like this.

I hope that this book helped Aaron's brother find some measure of peace. I appreciated the raw look into their lives, and I do genuinely believe this explains a lot of Aaron's behavior. I would like to read another book that presents evidence in this murder case, as that was not really discussed in this book.