There are so many things to say about this book. When I first finished it, I was disappointed and confused in the outcome, but then sat for over an hour picking the narrative apart and rethinking it in pieces until I began to see so much more. I am utterly overwhelmed. In fact, I have not stopped thinking about this novel since I finished it around twelve hours ago. It is sitting hard, like a lump in my chest. It is highly impactful, immobilizing, terrifying, and poignant. There is so much to consider and analyze.

In college, I read "The Yellow Wallpaper" by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. I was instantly transported to that experience upon reading Little Bandaged Days. The novel is a gripping account of postpartum depression and psychosis in the scope of modern day life. It is based lightly on the author's actual experience and it reads immensely authentically. I struggle to say everything I want to about this book without creating spoilers, so let me just say that this book could also be used as a college read for analysis. It is brilliantly crafted with a protagonist whose every action has meaning and even though you follow the read thinking you're understanding what is going on and all the pieces are falling together, you are left at the end questioning EVERYTHING you knew. It's an amazing read. But it is so incredibly painful.

The trauma gripped me hard. The pace moved from something I could handle and evaluate to something that tore the breath from me and left my heart beating anxiously with worry and concern. I am still not over that feeling.

I am a mother of two young children. I can identify with much of the early thoughts and feelings that the protagonist voices. (I don't recall her being named anywhere in the narrative, but the synopsis identifies her as Erika.) I know what it is like to become overwhelmed by the responsibilities of motherhood and the loss of self that comes along with that responsibility. I am all too keen on the feelings of absolute love and devotion for your children alongside an internal desire to have a moment of peace, a bit of time alone. Due to circumstances of my own life, I also understand her feelings of loneliness and solitude.

There are a lot of things to question about the construction of this novel and the individual characters within it, but I have to assert that I feel this is all purposeful. It makes sense looking backwards. It also does not make sense. Because that's how mental illness is.

I will need to read this again. I have no doubt. It bruised my motherly heart and tore me in pieces at times, but I need to relive it to see it deeper. Just writing through this has made me appreciate it even more.

* Disclaimer: I received a copy of this novel from the publisher, in exchange for an honest review. *