This book took me on a roller coaster of emotions, most of them negative unfortunately.

I was drawn to this book because as a female black gamer, albeit mixed black, I was so interested to read a book about not only a female black gamer, but game developer too! I was so excited diving in, to have a book that represented us, until within the first few chapters, I realised I wasn't counted among 'us'. For context I am a light skinned black person, and the ever present 'am I black enough' question runs through my mind almost daily. Am I enough of anything, to be someone. To be who I identify as. Now there is an undercurrent of inclusivity, one of the main characters is also mixed and she raises that question, however, it is overshadowed by comparative terms such as implying that both Zendaya and Rihanna are light skinned black people. They are, in my opinion, not. Making Zendaya an example of the lightest skin tone a black person can have, is so hurtful to those of us who are lighter skinned. It says that we do not count, that we are, outcasts. Belonging nowhere. And it's hurtful. When I read that sentence, I had to sit the book down and take a second or two. I am a shade lighter than Zendaya, implying she is the comparison for lighter skinned black people just invalidated my, and so many other's, existences. So if this is something that could potentially trigger you, then I would not recommend reading this book. I persevered because I really hoped it would get better, but I have never had to put down a book so frequently because of how bad it made me feel about myself before.

There is also the brief inclusion of a trans black person, who is honestly just mentioned as perhaps a token point in the story, and I was greatly disappointed that their character didn't appear anything more than that. Throwing in the inclusion of a black trans person without further developing their character and their contribution to the story, feels unnecessary. We hate the inclusion of 'token black people' in stories to make them look more inclusive and the same should be for trans folk. Including domestic abuse, or at least the threat of domestic abuse against this character, and then nothing else about them. Which disappointed me greatly, I wanted to know that they would be ok, I wanted to know that there was light for this character. And their online username was brought up twice more afterward, in passing, and nothing else.

And Malcolm, toxic Malcolm. If I hadn't persevered and stuck this story out to the end, I would never have seen the point of this character. He was just awful. Don't get me wrong, I'm a sucker for a villain, but there wasn't anything about him to like. He just screamed red flags from start to finish.

Having said all this there are some really important narratives throughout the story that need to be out in the world. Police brutality, the unfair justice system in the US towards persons of colour, casual racism and cultural appropriation were all really important themes. So many nuances of being the 'token black person' in scenarios.I think the last quarter of the book was the most interesting, as it included the most of what I had picked this book up for - black gamer girl excellence in a virtual reality world. I really loved the world she had created, the cards with their history and meaning and the sense of community she had strived for. I appreciated as well that eventually Keira saw the light when it came to her boyfriends skewed ideology and actions. I'm sure that those who don't have issues with self identity will love this story, however for me whilst it seemed all inclusive on the surface, there was just too many off hand implications that really left me deflated.