I don't know how to feel about this book. I've been so hyped to read it for so long that it feels like kind of a let down, but I didn't dislike it. I'm not sure how much I liked it either, though. I have very mixed feelings.

On the one hand, I loved the main character's perspective. David is a twisted individual who sees only what he wants in the world. He's violent, he's abusive, he burns down people's houses and physically assaults his mother. He stalks his exgirlfriend. Like the dude is wild. And I loved his perspective because of how absolutely horrid he is. That was by far my favorite part of the book.

But everything else kind of missed for me. I loved his perspective, but the book felt so purposeless. Yeah the dude is awful. Why, though? What's the point? What is the story? It didn't feel like the book did anything with either his relationships or his character development or any overall themes. All I got out of this was the perspective, which just wasn't enough for me.

And then we had the sex scenes. There were so many. Like oh so many and they were so long and so graphic. They just went on and on forever. I'm not the biggest fan of graphic sex scenes in general, but these were actively disgusting. Like purposefully disgusting, I'm not just complaining because they were graphic. Dude sucked a blood clot out of his girlfriend's vagina at one point. And that was just one paragraph of an incredibly lengthy sex scene where they both had like fifteen orgasms. I don't mind reading something that's intentionally disgusting. That for sure has its place in literature. But again, it felt pointless.

Mostly I left this book asking why. I like horrible characters. I like gross stuff. This book made me gag at one point and I love a book that makes me feel something so negative. But like, why? Apart from some cool elements, there just wasn't anything here. A cool perspective alone doesn't make a great story for me, and it felt like that was all this book had.