An incredibly realistic look into messy queer love, sometimes aggravatingly so, that still manages to avoid falling into the trappings of toxic sapphic archetypes. I would include Mitra’s queer longing into that sentence of praise, too, but there’s very little of it because the book is structured around her actual romantic relationship with Bea, not pining. Like some of the other reviewers, I wasn’t expecting that, and it was probably a result of the marketing.

The poetry in this is some of the strongest I’ve read in a YA novel(I’ve read quite a few in-verse, too), but it really shines when Mitra gets to yearn. In the beginning, when she’s analyzing her friendship with Bea, and if it could ever be something other than platonic. In the middle, when she wants to have her mother back in her life, and is struggling to come to terms with that. Those moments were when the featured bits of verse were more than just well-written metaphors. They were believable bits of emotion and internal conflict. (but if you were wondering, yeah…I thought the several poems about Bea and Mitra talking about how layered their love was could get a little repetitive. The only one of those that stuck with me was when Bea was dealing with her Catholic parents and she both used their relationship as defiance, and clung onto it for hope. I’m sure that one will resonate with a lot of people.)

Speaking of the poetry, I loved the actual class journal segments! Mrs Acosta’s notes reminded me of a couple of my highschool language arts teachers. Most accurate teacher feedback I’ve read in a book(probably also comes from the author working with kids/teens), and she as a character was a highlight. I loved how generally sweet and supportive she was, but also that she was able to have so much personality because she existed outside of the other strict and pious personality types seen in Mitra’s school. 

And this was already obvious, but Mitra’s family dynamic, especially her complicated relationship with her mother, was written with so much care and complexity. I loved the constant back-and-forth in how she addresses and thinks of her mom, too. There were so many layers, and it felt accurate for a teenager’s thoughts and trauma responses. 

But some minor critiques I have: 1) There were two or three parts where I think the author’s therapist background really showed, but not in a fully positive way. It didn’t make the dialogue feel stiff, thank god(..ha), but it did make certain revelations or themes feel on-the-nose. I doubt some teens on the middle/slightly younger side(like..14-16?) will notice it as much, though? 2) I’d like to have seen more of the actual friendship/pining stage!! The longing was spectacular. I’m not even asking for a ton, just 15 pages or so. If not for the pining, I would’ve liked to see a bit of Mitra and Bea’s friendship before the “will they won’t they” or the actual romance.