This book has so much heart, and plenty of its aspect had me absolutely captivated. Yami was so easy to love and root for. Yes, she’s not perfect—she messes up, misunderstands things, creates misunderstandings, and doesn’t always react to life rationally. But she’s so authentic in her narration, even when she withholds truth about herself from other characters, and the reasons for her choices are always understandable. Her experience of feeling othered because of who she is and trying to protect herself by blending in was written in such a relatable way. There were so many lines that had me choked up. I also loved her relationship with Bo, its whole progression from tentative friendship to a closer connection to romance with all the hiccups and stumbles in between. A really well done slow burn there.

Speaking of Bo, she was such a great example of how being brave about who you are helps other people. She’s so real and flawed, and I really liked her as a character in her own right, as well as Yami’s love interest. I also enjoyed all the comparing and contrasting between them, especially the part of the book where Yami spends the holidays with Bo’s family. I felt like both girls helped each other grow and lifted each other up. I do wish there was a bigger, more consistent focus on other members of their friend circle, though, and on the school in general. I felt a little let down by how little Catholic school there was in a book that literally has Catholic School in the title. There was a bit here and there, but overall it felt more like a regular school in a conservative society. The religious aspect of it ended up playing a far bigger part in Cesar’s arc then Yami’s, and Yami’s story was far more about family than school, so in that way, I felt the title was misleading. 

Expectations aside, the family struggles story pulled me in. I hesitate to say I enjoyed it because it deals in such heavy, sad matters. No kid should spend months and months saving money and making contingency plans for when they feel they will be inevitably disowned. Even though it does all work out well in the end, I was left feeling sad for Yami and Cesar and everything they went through. (Spoilers come next, TW: homophobia and its impact)

Yeah, sure, their mom comes around and becomes “all Pride and rainbows,” and at the end of the book Yami is in that euphoric relief stage over it, but I don’t feel like the damage their mom did was properly addressed. Yes, she comes around; that happens after her homophobic behavior has driven one of her children to be suicidal and put the other in a position where she was basically convinced she’s not loved and should just focus on ensuring she has enough money to not end up in the street. Not to mention the rest of the pressure she put on her children, and how it’s a miracle they didn’t end up hating each other with how she kept creating that divide between them.

I wish there was more done to make it clear the family will be working on healing their relationships, but instead all the pain felt almost dismissed in the end. Like, a “things have changed now, happy end, let’s not dwell” kind of vibe.

Something else I'd like to note: Cesar is a great example of a secondary character’s arc unfolding in plain sight without the POV character fully understanding what’s going on. To me, an adult with a bunch of relevant life experiences, it was very clear the guy wasn’t okay; I guessed at the specific brand of not-okay-ness he was dealing with early on, and I drew the correct conclusions from all the moments Yami looked back at late in the story going, “I should have known then.” But she did *not* know then—not because she’s a bad person or didn’t love her brother enough, but because she’s a teenager already struggling with so much, and sometimes she gets self-absorbed the way teenagers do, and she just lacks experience and information (especially since Cesar deliberately withholds quite a lot from her). So it makes sense why she misses the signs of trouble, but they still remain obvious for the reader equipped to catch them, even though it’s a first person POV novel where we never leave Yami’s headspace. And we get to witness Cesar’s entire journey without most of its beat being clearly explained and called for what they are—a great exercise in showing vs telling.

Overall, while this book inspired a lot of less than enjoyable emotions in me, it portrays a bunch of difficult subjects in a relatable, genuine manner, and the character arcs at the heart of the story are pretty well-crafted. The plot, on the other hand, meandered a lot, especially in the first half of the book. It became more focused as it progressed, but for a big part of the story, I wasn’t sure where it was going and which aspects I was meant to focus on more. I’m not 100% sure all the questions the plot was asking at the start matched the answers we were given at the end, so to speak. This book is already great in so many ways, but I think an extra editing pass with a focus on structure could have made it shine even brighter.