content warnings: war-related PTSD, fatphobia, online harassment, devastating cyclone, mentions of death
representation: fat main character, mlm main character with PTSD, depression & anxiety, mlm main character, f/m/m relationship

“I think about that for a moment. Think about how electric it felt last night to be between the two of them, because it was electric and somehow also comforting―like nothing I’ve ever felt before in bed. As if between the three of us we could handle anything, we could explore everywhere, our shared strength and energy creating a web of safety and affection all around us.”

Y'all mind if I just go scream for a minute??

This! Was! So! Good! I somehow have never read anything from Sierra Simone before but I'm definitely going to be reading everything else she writes now because this was so unbelievably fantastic.

Ireland is a fat woman who has decided to start wearing the clothes she wants to wear, stop going on useless diets, and just generally be happy with her body. She's also a photographer who has been sent on assignment to a country town where she meets two hunky farm boys, Caleb and Ben, and they want to jump each others' bones almost immediately. So they do. Many times.

I don't expect much from erotica, if I'm being honest. All I really want is basic entertainment, to read something steamy that would make me feel ashamed for reading it in public. I certainly don't expect characters that I care about or to nearly cry over how hard something hit me, but Sierra Simone is a goddess among erotica writers and she really delivered on all fronts.

But let's get it out of the way, I know you're waiting for it: the sex is incredible. There are many sex scenes throughout the book and they're all fantastic. The main characters are perpetually horny and rarely restrain themselves, something which I appreciated. There are some scenes that are just Ireland with one of the boys (this is usually just oral), but most of them are her with both of them and they are some of the hottest shit I've ever read. I did read some of this in public and I turned my phone brightness all the way down while angling myself away from everyone because things were getting hot.

Aside from how steamy the scenes were, I also did fall head over heels in love with Ireland, Caleb and Ben. We get the book from all three of their perspectives, and while all of them easily fall into some familiar archetypes Simone makes them just unique and endearing enough that by the time the book ended I was left wishing it was double the length. If she ever writes more with these characters I will be first in line.

Whenever the book isn't just about sex, it's mostly about the characters working through their issues, specially Ireland with her body and Ben with his PTSD. Ben is a veteran who has been seeing a therapist and psychiatrist for five years which helps but he still has difficulty sleeping through the night, and every time they have sex he leaves once Ireland and Caleb are asleep to sleep in his bedroom so he doesn't disturb them. In the grand scheme of this book it's obviously a pretty minor thing, but I thought it was handled really realistically, and I liked how it was shown to effect his relationship with Ireland and Caleb but was never presented as a negative thing they needed to get over in order to be happy.

Seeing a fat girl being worshiped really unlocked some floodgates tbh. Caleb is very unapologetic in admitting that he likes fat girls, and this is shown to us several times throughout the book from both him and Ben in ways that never felt gross or leery like these things often can. There's also some really great discussions in here about how body positivity isn't something you can just decide to do; even though Ireland has been learning to love her body, there are still times when she hates it and wishes she was thin. Your insecurities, especially ones drilled into you by society from birth, don't just disappear because you've decided to love yourself; they tend to linger, and the second someone says something that confirms that insecurity it becomes all-consuming. Even when you have people telling you that it's not true, there's a part of you that thinks they're lying.

Woof, this got very serious all of a sudden. In conclusion, this is fantastic steamy romance that every erotica reader should pick up, it's a blast!