How freeing would it be to simply … lean into monstrosity? To make that dangerous bargain? To unapologetically and unwaveringly hunger for power? 

I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast Is Me is a wonderfully fanged & clawed & bloodthirsty villain origin story. And you won’t ever stop rooting for her.

Laure Mesny is a brilliant ballerina. But despite being top of her class and as talented as the rest of the dancers, she’s overlooked time and time again. Parisian ballet just isn’t willing to let a Black girl shine.

When Laure discovers a powerful entity in a river of blood beneath the city, she strikes a deal. She’ll get godlike powers and become undeniable … but power always comes with a cost. And her violent ambition makes her a target to everyone.

Laure agonizes over her need for art and a cutthroat world that pushes her down again and again. She’s had to work twice as hard as any of her peers, has to be perfect just to be seen. And she’s furious about it.

I was viciously hooked from the start. The prose is rich and relatable, and while the dance world isn’t always portrayed completely accurately, the themes of sacrifice for success and destroying yourself for your art will ring true for any creative. 

Laure faces prejudice - both racist and classist - from her peers and from the oppressive institution itself. They’re always demanding more. More loyalty, more sacrifice, more unpeeling yourself. And when she starts to bite back, it’s so satisfying. (Let her do it all!!)

I did think that sometimes we got lost in the richness of the writing, and I wanted a bit more information and context, specifically around the gods and powers and bargains. The vibes were consistently delicious, but I wish there was a bit more to solidly place us in this reality. But the atmospheric horror of the violence and the rivers Acheron and Leche were so, so good. The QUOTES I could pull from this!

The ballerinas were (mostly) rancid and the eclectic group of fellow bargainers who become a bit of a found family were all fleshed out well and quite unique. I lowkey felt like this could have been SO much more sapphic and I thought we were heading in one direction (Laure is bi), but we mostly left that energy on the table. 

Overall, I loved this and really want to dive into the sequel! If you’re into “good for her” rage and girls becoming monstrous gods to find their freedom, please pick this one up. 

CW: murder, death, blood, body horror, racism, toxic friendship, gore, classism, body shaming, bullying, injury, self harm, abandonment, fatphobia, misogyny, fire, gaslighting, grief, vomit

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