I reserve 1 star for books I can't even fathom other people liking and I wouldn't recommend anyone spend their time reading it. At first, this seemed like it jsut wasn't my taste and I could maybe see why other's would like it. I never went into this with high hopes, but the further I got the more I read this the more I wondered if the author ever talked to anyone. It sounds harsh, but this feels like every trope ever written by someone who has never talked to a real person before.

First of all the character was annoying. So annoying. And the reason she isn't girly is that she doesn't have a mom? That's it. Not that she likes it, not that she's trying to figure out who she is, just that she did not have a mom to teach her how to be girly. That's it.

This book plays into gender stereotypes with zero nuance. The main character isn't even caught in between. She goes from being the tomboyish tomboy who is apparently allowed to get off with bitting people Scott-free because she's a tomboy with a brother to a girly girl. It's all either-or and heavily implies that in order for the MC to be fulfilled, she has to not only embrace her feminine side but become feminine. There's no nuance, no maybe I can be both, or even maybe I don't have to wear dresses to be accepted and still get a boyfriend. It's a very bad message.

Now that's the MC, none of the side characters have any nuance either. They're all very gendered stereotypes. the weird shop lady, the girly girl, the overprotective, patronizing brothers who won't let their little sister date, anyone, to the point where she has little delf-confidence about it because they won't let anyone give her any attention (can this just die? Male siblings don't own their female siblings and should not intimidate all her friends). Not to mention there is a line in the book where Charlie thinks that being nice to someone and returning a compliment is "girl-stuff." Being nice is not girl stuff. it should be the bare minimum you expect from people.

As someone who went through phases of nothing but girly stuff and nothing that could be considered girly, I was eventually able to find a balance I liked. I was also between the ages of six and twelve and did not understand nuance yet. Charlie fits in this category. She's sixteen. If this book was about Charlie finding and understanding this nuance it would already be so much better. Or realizing she just does not want to have anything to do with traditional "girly" stuff and that people will still love her if she rejects these. That would have been great too.

Also, was this supposed to be romance? I wouldn't even call this a slow burn, just constant Charlie trying to be a girl. There wasn't any plot at all.

This book also has a lot of issues with how it portrayed mental illness and alcoholism in the character's parents and where the blame was placed. It was very victim-blaming. It's was the wife of the alcoholic's fault that he was allowed to live that way and selfish of the woman with depression to [TW]

Spoiler

commit suicide

. When the MC finally found that out about her mom, she was mad that her mother wasn't there to teach her how to be a girl.

And I'm also just surprised that a girl whose father is in the police force just gets away with almost anything. Her reaction to being told to get a job was laughable. Then when she got one, it's one with a sketchy woman, no contract, and no mention of a minimum wage. I have no idea where this takes place or what the minimum wage there was in 2014 but I'm pretty sure this was below it. Also, who makes you buy clothes from their store to wear to work. Whatever happened to uniforms?

Then there's the modelling gig. they actually just photographed a completely different girl than the one who had signed all the consent forms just because she was filling in for her sick?

There are so many elements in this book that are just infuriating and illogical, completely contrived to make Charlie the perfect "girly girl" in the end.

Finally, I just want to add that Charlie's dad is a pretty bad dad if every time Charlie has a problem her first thought is she can't go to him because he's male. Sure, maybe he didn't nurture Charlie's girly side and Charlie makes it sound like she never had a girly side until she started working, but that doesn't excuse not being able to or willing to try and help her sort stuff out just because she has "girl problems."