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leandrathetbrzero 's review for:
When the Moon Hatched
by Sarah A. Parker
DID NOT FINISH: 40%
If I were Dante, the reading of this book would be one of my circles of Hell. I suffered. And When the Moon Hatched might have convinced me to finally start rating DNFs. š¤£
Actual Rating: 0.25
DNF @ 40%
If you want my play by play thoughts, here they are but no promises that there arenāt spoilersā¦the plots pretty predictable though so š¤·š»āāļø
⢠The descriptions have no function beyond the author trying hard to sound lyrical and prove she knows what a simile is
⢠The gore is so overdone it begins to be comical. Charactersā deaths take full chapters and somehow they can still hold full conversations when they really should have died/passed out immediately
⢠The mentions of poop, shit, shat, turds. Advice: do not make it a drinking game.
⢠The love interests are classic: man in need of a good therapist that is 1 1/2 feet taller than our petite perky-boobed protagonist
⢠Female/male gives alpha male with a podcast energy ā¦ch 15 āif whipping a female makes you feel like a strong BOY.ā You have the word BOY in this male/female world? What?
⢠Raeve is a terrible assassin 𤣠no common sense or demonstration that she knows what sheās doing
⢠The language: ādaeā you mean DAY? āSkin suitā you mean clothes?
⢠One-folk showā and āslumber terrorā and āfull of dragon shitā š so you want them to speak like we do but make it sillier
⢠āCome forth to the lightā š What in the King Arthur? why are we weirdly old English randomly and speaking like they are from 2024 the rest of the time
⢠Him smelling her. I canāt š¤¢
⢠Her sass and tough mouth/snark is not earned at all; the incompetence
⢠The main character is a violent immature teen on an adult womanās body
⢠āWow these baby dragons and larger and stronger than I expectedā and it turns out itās the love interest š ālifts me like a sack of grainā š āhe looks down upon meā while she is on his lap? āStack of muscles that feel more like rocksā š āheās the biggest male Iāve seen, in more ways than oneā she aims to kick him in the nuts and things āconsidering the size of my target, I shouldnāt missā GOD SHUT UP.
⢠The number of times she threatens to kill the love interest is so numbing by the 100th time, especially bc all she does is moon over his body; and him āsay my nameā š and then he proceeds to not say her name but calls her moonbeam š¤¢š¤®
⢠Ew ew ew is this dragon ride the one horse trope?? 𤮠okay false alarm
⢠She speaks like a teenager and he speaks at times like heās from a different time. yuck.
⢠Why does he pick up and toss her around so much š
⢠Sticking their tongues out at each other. Are they children?? I swear this is so YA it pains me
⢠Why doesnāt she ask him why he randomly gives her the nickname moonbeam. Ugh Seven Year Slip flashbacks
⢠All she does is look at his body. His MANHOOD. WHY DO WE HAVE THE WORD MANHOOD BUT USE āFEMALEā and āMALEā??
⢠The predictability of this narrative, with who Raeve is, her history with Kaan
⢠Iām suffering.
⢠I love how she calls herself cursed when she has been the luckiest mf Iāve ever seen
⢠If she says ātha-dumpā one more time
ā¢She may actually be the dumbest protagonist Iāve ever encountered. Itās exhausting to follow her POV
⢠Iām already tired of him trying to get her to remember who she is and who he is š reminds me of that Sarah macadams and tanning chatum movie that I never watched
⢠āIm not usually so bad at slaughteringā LOL says the worst assassin in existence
⢠āShe snorts soup through her nose laughing at such a random moment and āit feels good. I never know it could feel so good.ā Dear god.
⢠āHe doesnāt want X Y or Z. He wants something worseā¦meā š and then he feeds her like a childā¦I mean, youngling š What.
Actual Rating: 0.25
DNF @ 40%
If you want my play by play thoughts, here they are but no promises that there arenāt spoilersā¦the plots pretty predictable though so š¤·š»āāļø
⢠The descriptions have no function beyond the author trying hard to sound lyrical and prove she knows what a simile is
⢠The gore is so overdone it begins to be comical. Charactersā deaths take full chapters and somehow they can still hold full conversations when they really should have died/passed out immediately
⢠The mentions of poop, shit, shat, turds. Advice: do not make it a drinking game.
⢠The love interests are classic: man in need of a good therapist that is 1 1/2 feet taller than our petite perky-boobed protagonist
⢠Female/male gives alpha male with a podcast energy ā¦ch 15 āif whipping a female makes you feel like a strong BOY.ā You have the word BOY in this male/female world? What?
⢠Raeve is a terrible assassin 𤣠no common sense or demonstration that she knows what sheās doing
⢠The language: ādaeā you mean DAY? āSkin suitā you mean clothes?
⢠One-folk showā and āslumber terrorā and āfull of dragon shitā š so you want them to speak like we do but make it sillier
⢠āCome forth to the lightā š What in the King Arthur? why are we weirdly old English randomly and speaking like they are from 2024 the rest of the time
⢠Him smelling her. I canāt š¤¢
⢠Her sass and tough mouth/snark is not earned at all; the incompetence
⢠The main character is a violent immature teen on an adult womanās body
⢠āWow these baby dragons and larger and stronger than I expectedā and it turns out itās the love interest š ālifts me like a sack of grainā š āhe looks down upon meā while she is on his lap? āStack of muscles that feel more like rocksā š āheās the biggest male Iāve seen, in more ways than oneā she aims to kick him in the nuts and things āconsidering the size of my target, I shouldnāt missā GOD SHUT UP.
⢠The number of times she threatens to kill the love interest is so numbing by the 100th time, especially bc all she does is moon over his body; and him āsay my nameā š and then he proceeds to not say her name but calls her moonbeam š¤¢š¤®
⢠Ew ew ew is this dragon ride the one horse trope?? 𤮠okay false alarm
⢠She speaks like a teenager and he speaks at times like heās from a different time. yuck.
⢠Why does he pick up and toss her around so much š
⢠Sticking their tongues out at each other. Are they children?? I swear this is so YA it pains me
⢠Why doesnāt she ask him why he randomly gives her the nickname moonbeam. Ugh Seven Year Slip flashbacks
⢠All she does is look at his body. His MANHOOD. WHY DO WE HAVE THE WORD MANHOOD BUT USE āFEMALEā and āMALEā??
⢠The predictability of this narrative, with who Raeve is, her history with Kaan
⢠Iām suffering.
⢠I love how she calls herself cursed when she has been the luckiest mf Iāve ever seen
⢠If she says ātha-dumpā one more time
ā¢She may actually be the dumbest protagonist Iāve ever encountered. Itās exhausting to follow her POV
⢠Iām already tired of him trying to get her to remember who she is and who he is š reminds me of that Sarah macadams and tanning chatum movie that I never watched
⢠āIm not usually so bad at slaughteringā LOL says the worst assassin in existence
⢠āShe snorts soup through her nose laughing at such a random moment and āit feels good. I never know it could feel so good.ā Dear god.
⢠āHe doesnāt want X Y or Z. He wants something worseā¦meā š and then he feeds her like a childā¦I mean, youngling š What.