I have a LOT of emotions about this book and my brain is not properly functioning at the moment. This review is going to be all over the place and will probably not mention a majority of things. But, my word, did I love this book! And to think this is a debut!

This book goes from dark to horribly dark and brutal. It is definitely not for younger readers or people who don't like graphic descriptions of war, among other things.

trigger warnings:
- mistreatment of orphan
- colourism
- self harm (burning skin to improve concentration and focus)
- W A R
- bullying (both physical and emotional)
- graphic details of torture and rape
- graphic details of corpses
- infanticide
- murder
- human experimentation
- chemical warfare
- mutilation
- torture
- drug addiction and withdrawal
- W A R

I don't know how you did it, Ms Kuang, but I hate and love the main characters so much. At the same time. They do horrible things, they are irritating and exasperating, but still, sort of lovable. I am still not sure where I stand with regard to the protagonist, Rin. Do I like her? Do I despise her? I loved her in the first part but in parts two and three, she just became so whiny and so unlike her former self. I am not sure she had a single discussion where she was not arguing or being disrespectful. I hope she undergoes some character development in the next book.

Can we take a moment to appreciate the honest transformation of Nezha from a bully to a friend? The scene where Rin and Nezha are fighting with their backs to each other has my whole heart.

Also this book has no romance! I mean, yes, attraction is hinted at. But it doesn't develop. And I love that! It's wartime. Romance should be the last thing on the minds of these characters.

The side characters. I just loved each and every one of them. All the Cike soilders, oof. So well-written and so complex. And Kitay! That boy needs to be protected at all costs! The absolute best friend anyone could ever ask for. Now Altan. Just like Rin, I don't know whether I truly love him. He did hit her and was incredibly rude to her. But he's so lovable. AH I don't know. But that scene made me cry so hard. The fact that Chagnan did not feel it gives me some hope. So I'll keep my fingers crossed for a miracle in The Dragon Republic.

All in all, if you love fantasy and are not put off by that long list of trigger/content warnings, do give this book a try. You might not like it, you might even end up hating it, but it is one of the most popular fantasy by an author of colour at the moment. Don't miss out.