5.0

This book is exceptionally quotable:

"Don't worry, Snickers McMuffin (cat) hasn't been biding his time, glaring at you from behind the couch, waiting for you to take your last breath to be all, "Spartans! Tonight we dine in hell!"

"For many years, a wartime funeral procession ended not at the grave, but at the dead house. Normally the mourners would head straight to the burial site, but if the ground was frozen the body had to wait for the spring thaw in the afterlife equivalent of the DMV."