TW - Rape, bulimia, anorexia, fat phobia.

I read this memoir in bits and pieces because the weight of it was too much to carry at once. After I finished reading, I smoothened the last page and tried to imagine the kind of courage that must have taken Roxane Gay to write this book. The enormity of her past, the one that she sewed on to her body for years must have felt like a burning scar. Most of us have struggled with our bodies, finding ways to punish it for the traumas of our past. Hunger too is one such memoir, of the body.

Roxane Gay’s memoir starts off with her sitting in a hospital with her considering Gastric Bypass surgery. She describes her body, the way she sees it and how others judge it. She carries her weight with the shame that comes with taking up large spaces. But as we slowly dive into the depths of the book, she reveals a haunting incident that occurred when she was a teenager that forever changed her world. It’s not easy to sit and read about a young girl being violated and abused by men. What happened then left a lasting impact on Roxane and she turned her attention to food. She didn’t enjoy what she ate but merely did so because she wanted to protect her body from the eyes of predators. She wanted to grow and expand, become untouchable so that she could always feel safe.

This wasn’t hunger for food but hunger to eat the pain.

Hunger is one of its kind memoir. It’s all gory, truth that feels like acid, anger that threatens to erupt like a volcano and pain that is on the verge of exploding like a dam.

Writing too much about it would be giving the entire book away so I’ll stop. But if you’re planning to read one more nonfiction before the year ends, please read this one.

Highly recommended.